Adrift: A Little Mermaid Retelling

28: Daniel

It was five years before I came back to Annisport for good. I had docked there many times on the Summerwave, and each time I had tried to find the courage to stop. I wanted to go to Agnes, to tell her what I had learned about her mother.

I had never been brave enough. The thought of what Wyll might do if he saw me again had always been enough to keep me where I was. Now, though, I knew that if I didn't force myself to face her family now, I never would.

Standing there on the dock, I realized that time had flown by, although it had crawled as I was living it day-to-day. Here I stood, fully a man, with muscles from hard work, a tan from the sun over the sea, and a scar or two from the journey. I was not sure I had my fill of wandering, but now I would take the wages I had saved up and do a bit of it on land. I could always sign on again with Captain Baron, if he came back this way; otherwise, there was no shortage of ships passing through the colonies. There was only one to avoid.

I left the docks and found myself lodging in the town for a night. I had a good washing-up, a shave, and a haircut, and I had my clothes laundered properly for the first time in months. Men make do, but it was pleasant the next morning to put on a pressed shirt that still smelled of the freshness of the clothesline.

I paid passage on an ox-cart heading east and sat in the back, looking out at the summer countryside and enjoying the sun on my face. When we passed the Allore manor, I hopped off the cart with my satchel on my back and looked up at the high window, half expecting to see her standing there as she had when I'd left—as she told me she had the first day I had come. But there was no one.

A stranger opened to my knock. When I looked again, I realized it was old Sybill. I laughed with my joy and opened my arms to her. "Sybill!"

Her face had changed in the few years I'd been gone; her hair was all snow-white, and thin, tied up in a tiny knot at the back of her head. At first she did not recognize me, either; then she smiled and embraced me. "Daniel! Lad, I did not know you at first—my, how you've grown!"

"I took up work as a sailor. That'll age a man, if nothing else," I said, touching her cheek with my calloused palm. "Lord, but it's good to see you, ma'am."

"And you," Sybill replied. Her eyes looked wet. Her grin was nearly toothless; she now walked with a cane. She had been inches away from needing one when I left, but it was still a prick to the heart to see her leaning on it. "A sailor, eh? Did you keep out of trouble, lad?"

"Mostly." I winked at her. "I'll probably go back, in fact. Not a comfortable life, but one does what one knows, and I had time to learn well these few years past. They aren't miserly with teaching on the sea—and even less stingy with a cuff for failure."

Sybill laughed and patted my arm. "It must have made you miss me, then," she said.

"Oh, sorely, ma'am." I paused to draw a breath for courage. "I had hoped to see Miss Allore."

Sybill hesitated, then stepped out onto the porch, closing the door behind her. "Ah, lad, she's not Miss Allore anymore. She is no longer here, and she has not been back, not once these few years past. Her brothers have visited her a few times, but I myself have not seen her since her wedding."

I had expected it—hadn't I told myself a hundred times, a thousand, that she would be wed? But still, the news fell upon me like a blow. "Married."

I think Sybill saw my heart, for she rested her hand on my arm. "I wish I could invite you in, my dearest boy, but I cannot. Wait just a moment here, and I'll bring you something to lighten your journey."

Before I could protest, she had shuffled back into the house. My mind was still reeling from the news.

I knew Sybill would be in trouble if I was spotted, so I stood back against the wall, hoping neither Wylliam nor Cuthbert would venture out onto the porch; luckily, they did not, and Sybill returned a moment later with a little bundle tied up in a linen napkin.

"Please, Sybill," I protested. "I should not take anything from this place."

"You will," she insisted, pressing the bundle into my hands. "I won't have it any other way. There's an apple, and some bread and jerky. Also, one of Sorla's jam tarts. You're a bigger man now than you were when you left, and it does not look like you have much lunch in that bag you carry, Daniel. I am sorry you did not find her here."

"Who is she now, then? Where does she live?"

Sybill patted my cheek. "She married the captain over at Annisport. Mistress Dremmer, she is."

She was still speaking—something about missing Agnes, hoping she had children, hoping I wouldn't go calling, as it would only bring trouble. I barely heard it. My stomach had dropped. Dremmer? Of all the people for her to have wed—Dremmer?

Did she love him?

Had she loved him even then? When she and I had been together, had she—?

Sybill touched my arm. "Daniel. Daniel? You could stir up trouble, poking around. You won't, will you, lad?"

"No, of course not. I'll leave her to her life," I said. My voice sounded like it came from far away.

As soon as Sybill and I had parted ways with warm good-byes, I set off walking back toward Annisport. Back the way I'd come.

***

Sybill was right—I had not brought any food with me. I ate as I walked, but I didn't taste a crumb.

It was coming on night again by the time I got back. I was not sure where to go to find Captain and Mistress Dremmer, but I knew I wouldn't be welcomed at night, even if I did.

I found a bed at the King's Harbor inn. Before I went to my rest, I stopped in the common room to buy a pint of ale. At one table I saw a pair of soldiers, deep in their cups by the look of them, and I approached them.

"Good evening," I said.

"Ah, and what's good," said one of the soldiers, shaking his head.

His fellow clapped him on the shoulder with a laugh. "You'll get over it, mate."

"Did something happen?" I asked.

"Nothin' hurt but his pride. Made a fool of himself in a drill today, and the captain gave him a right proper tongue-lashing." He guffawed. "Ah! If only I were there to see it!"

I began to doubt whether I'd get any useful information out of either of these men. "I wonder if you might help me."

"Aye, and?"

"I'm looking to join on as a soldier. I'm new to the city—fresh in from the docks. A sailor. D'you know where I can go to speak to Captain Dremmer?"

The tall soldier cocked his head, surveying me now with a gleaming, drunken eye. I could feel him weighing up my tanned face, the corded muscles in my arms beneath my rolled-up sleeves. "Best be up at the dawn. He leaves home not long after, and keeps a tight schedule through the day."

My heart leapt in my chest. "I can meet him at his home, you say? Where's that?"

"If you catch him there. He lives just off the barracks. Do not expect to be entertained." The soldier laughed, as if this were a joke. Even the other soldier—the one who'd been chastised on the field—smiled.

"Aye—I'll be ready. Thank you kindly for the guidance, sir." I had thought I might buy each of them a drink, but from the looks of them, they had no need of more. I bid them good night and went on up to my bed. I fell onto the hard straw pallet in a room where three other people already snored.

I closed my eyes, hoping my internal timepiece would rouse me early enough—if not to catch the captain, then to catch a glimpse of his wife. It was difficult to sleep. My mind was in too much of a turmoil. I lay there unhappily until dawn.