Fallen Lights

Prologue 🚩

I sat in the dark and placed the joint in between ma lips. I took in a mid-range puff before letting the smoke ripped out of my nose. After a few more puffs, I dashed the rest of substance into the ashtray.

No television. No lights. Just pure silence besides the music blaring from my speaker. I figured that'll eased the pain but I was sadly mistaken.

🎶While all the time that I was loving you
You were busy loving yourself
I would stop breathing if you told me to
Now you're busy loving someone else🎶

I'm wasn't perfect, but I'd follow her into hell if that's what it took to keep her safe. She was my protector as I was hers, one to shield the other. She was supposed to stay with me as I had did the same for her, trust in me as I trusted in her, and together we was suppose to ride through every storm, awaited to see what the new dawn must had to bring.

🎶Eleven years out of my life
Besides the kids I have nothing to show
Wasted my years, a fool of a wife
I should have left your ass a long time ago🎶

"This is wrong, can't you see!? What will they think of us!?" I didn't give a damn about acceptance but obviously she did. I wasn't like HER instead, I care bout commitment, respect & value rather then money & greed.

I can't even bring myself to answer the question; "what did I do wrong!?" Thats a question, I'm unable to answer. I cooked, clean, didn't ask for a DAMM thing besides loyalty n' communication.

So if I did everything right how come I'm the one thats left dry!? The way she looks at her, she'll neva once lit up for me when she saw except when it was time for sex!? How come I'm the one coping with the loss our relationship while she dancing around time as if there wasn't a "us" !?

🎶Well, I'm not gon' cry
I'm not gon' cry
I'm not gon' shed no tears
No, I'm not gon' cry
It's not the time
'Cause you're not worth my tears ...🎶

My phone lit up like a light switch, vibrating on the wooden table. I knew it was her or that snake ass bitch that was my so-called "bestfriend". My phone cooled down then vibrated again.

"Voicemail from Asshole" siri spoke ..

"Baby come on! I love you more than anything Cynthia, come on!? How can you just throw us away .. babe plese pick up"

"Siri delete voicemail"

"Voicemail delete, would you like to listen to the other voicem-

"Siri delete all voicemails"

"Voicemails deleted"

I tild my head back into the upper cushions of the couch. My eyes were shut as tears began to damp my pale cheeks. My head was killing me, probably from all the overthinking .. I was inches away from dozing off, listening to the sad-songs that continued to play off of my playlist ..

🎶Time on my hands
Since you been away boy
I ain't got no plans
No no no no
And the sound of the rain
Against my windowpane
Is slowly, is slowly drivin' me insane, boy