Learn To Love.

Chapter 10

Red felt like there was cotton stuffed in his skull. He groaned and opened his eyes to bright white light- and he promptly closed them again. No fucking way was he putting up with that.

"Red?"

Against his better judgement, his eyes fluttered open and he saw Sans. The light made his head hurt more than it already did.

"Hey Blueberry," he said, mustering up as much volume as he could. He was sweating. He took in his surroundings- they were completely unfamiliar. He was on a sterile-looking bed, and Sans was sitting in a seat beside him. He looked at his wrist and saw an IV driven into his bone. He winced- that had to be bone deep to reach anything that mattered. Ouch.

"Where... are we?" he asked.

"A hospital in New Home," Sans said. His voice was subdued, and it looked like he was about to cry, but he just rubbed Red's arm and sighed. "You've been asleep for about a day."

"Oh..." He didn't remember what happened. He went to sit up only for his left leg to scream and protest. He hissed at the pain until he remembered.

Oh. Oh yeah.

"I... shit."

"It's okay. All that matter is that you're okay," Sans said, but he really was crying now. "How do you feel?"

"Like shit," Red responded, but his soul was sinking fast. It must have taken a lot of fucking magic to stop him from bleeding out. He'd done it a few times before- when the resets were happening back in his timeline- he would know.

"The doctor says you have to stay here for at least a week. I called off work for the next few days."

Red looked away. "I'm sorry. I... I didn't mean to cause this much trouble..."

"No- please don't apologize," Sans said, wiping away his tears. "It doesn't matter. I..." his voice broke and he looked away. "I-I thought I was going to lose you..."

Red's soul twisted. He reached out a hand and touched Blue's arm.

"I'm... I'm sorry. I'm really fuckin' sorry. I shouldn't... I shouldn't have done it. I didn't think... "

Sans sniffled before he seemed to steal himself. "It's okay. I love you- I really, really do. Please don't forget that... that you mean a lot to me. And to Papyrus- and your father. I don't know what I would do if... if you weren't here anymore."

Red stared down at his IV and the little hospital bracelet on his wrist. He didn't like seeing Sans cry. He hated it even more when it was all his fault.

"I... I need help," he said eventually. The words had to be forced out. "I-I know I already ask a lot of you guys, and I... I know I'm... I know it's hard to deal with me-"

"We love you," Sans said at once. "We love you, please don't say things like that." He touched Red's wrist before smiling at the injured monster through his tears. "Admitting you need help is the first step, right? The doctor says she wants to keep you here for another week, and then you can start therapy and some antidepressants- whatever it turns out you need. We're all here for you- it's gonna be okay."

Red nodded. He didn't have much to say- he heard the door click open before he could think of a response.

"Hey bro, I got you some f-" Papyrus said quietly as he stepped into the room, but as soon as he saw Red sitting there, his sockets went wide and he stopped.

Red's memories were starting to become less fuzzy. He stared up at Papyrus even as the bigger monster was rushing in- sitting on the edge of his bed and pulling him into a hug.

"You're awake- oh god-"

Papyrus hugged him for all he was worth. Red felt sharp, dizzying guilt coiled in his bones, but Papyrus was nuzzling him like he'd never see him again and he could only wrap his arms around the skeleton as he began to sob.

"H-H... hey Pap," Red said, surprised to find tears in his own voice.

Papyrus said nothing. He started crying, but soon he was all-out bawling and he had Red in a death grip.

"I-I thought I'd never see you again-" he whimpered. Red's breath hitched. "I thought- fuck- f-fuck Red- I fuckin- I-"

Papyrus just blubbered. Red looked to Blueberry, but he had his eyes down and his fists scrunched in the fabric of his pants as he cried, too.

"I'm sorry," Red managed to say, but Papyrus shook his head fiercely.

"No- no no no, please don't- it doesn't matter. Fuck. Fuckin' hell I... I..."

Gaster followed behind Papyrus. He stood beside Blueberry, but Red felt... numb. He looked up at his father and tried to apologize with his eyes, but it was hard. They were all crying. Papyrus was holding him like if he let go, Red would blow away into dust. He was the one who'd seen it... Red hadn't even considered who would find him. He just wanted the pain and the confusion to go away.

They... cared. They all really, honest to god cared about him. Red hugged Papyrus back. Before long the other two joined them on the bed. It was so hard to understand. He didn't understand. He wanted to.

Red started crying.