That smile

A permanent solution to a temporary problem

December 29th is finally here. The last week has been a living H. E. Double hockey sticks. It seems like everyone in town knows about that text now. People are constantly harassing me and some actually threatened me. One actually beat me. I try to cover up my black eye as much as I can. My heart aches.
"Good luck on your show tonight honey." My mom says in a calm voice. I didn't tell her about the bullying. I don't want to tell her anything.
"You're not coming?" I ask.
"I... Can't." She says slowly.
"It's fine." She didn't even apologize because she couldn't go. I grab my guitar and head towards the concert hall.
I get there and the heavy rock music fills the air. This feels like home to me.
My mind goes blank as I'm waiting for my name to be called. I think about what just happened this past week. My life was ruined just because of one message. Because of Ethan, the guy I found myself falling for.
"Penelope." I jump when my name is said. I grab my guitar and head onto the stage. I feel like I'm going to throw up.
There is so many people in the crowd. I take a deep breath. I try to forget all that happened. And I focus on my music. I begin to strum my guitar. Soon I start to sing.
After my performance, I get almost everyone cheering for me, even the judges. I won't know if I won until they call me after the new year, but I feel pretty confident. If I win I could live my dream. I can make CDs, go on tours, start a legit band...
"Penny?"
Well...
Poop...
I turn around and meet Ethans eyes. I go up into his face.
"You have a lot of nerve showing up here." I said.
"I... I wanted to see you perform. You killed it out there." He said.
I scoff. "Hmph. That probably means I sounded like a dying cat knowing your logic..." I glare at him.
"Penelope, please believe me when I tell you it wasn't my fault." He said.
"Then who's fault was it?" I put my hands on my hips.
"James and two other girls." He said. "They hacked into my phone and messed everything up making it look like I was the one who sent that message. James felt guilty and told me this morning. Although I have no idea how he got information about Blake and your dad. I can play you the voicemails if you want more proof."
I shake my head. "I don't know if I should believe you or not." I said.
He grabs my shoulders. "I would never hurt you. I care about you way to much. You're so important to me and it killed me when we didn't talk at all this week. Please, I'm begging you to believe me." He says never leaving my gaze.
Darn it! I hate him!
I grab his face and kiss him for a few seconds. My heart was beating rapidly.
"Does that mean you believe me?" He asks.
I slap my hand across his face. "I'm still mad at you." I say and walk away.

I open the door to my house.
"Mom, I'm back." I said. But I get greeted by silence. She should be home from work by now. "Mom?" I go to her room and flip the light switch on. My jaw almost drops. Her room is empty except for the mattress on her bed.
"Mom?!" I tell. Panic begins to take over. I go to my room and search for my phone that I threw the other day. If had one small crack on the screen. I contact her boss.
"Hello?" They say when they pick up the phone.
"Hi, this is Penelope. Tracy's daughter, is she there?" I ask.
"No, she isn't. I was about to call and ask the same thing." He said.
"What do you mean?" I ask. "She was at work today, right?"
"She hasn't been at work for the last few days."
Shock stricken upon me so bad, I dropped the phone.
"Hello? Are you still there miss?" I hear the man through the speaker.
"I'll have to call you back..." My hand was shaking as I pressed the end call button. I contact pastor Daniel.
"Hello?" I hear him.
I start crying. "Pastor Daniel, is my mom there?" I ask.
"No, she isn't. Is everything okay Penelope?" He says.
"No, my mom hasn't been at work and she's not here. Her room is completely empty. I haven't found a note or anything, I hope she's okay." I cry.
"Penelope, take a deep breath. I will call the police and I'll be over in a minute, okay? Just stay calm." He hangs up.
A few minutes later, I see blue and red lights out the window. I then hear a knock on the door. Daniel stands outside with a few police officers behind him. I let them in.
"Are you Tracy's daughter?" One of them asks me. I nod. "Okay. We're going to ask you a few questions." He both sit down across from each other. "When was the last time you saw your mom?" he says holding a notebook and a pen.
"This morning. I saw her before the music competition. I thought she was going to work but I called her boss and he said she hasn't been there for a few days." I said holding tears back.
"Did your parents have a fight?" He said.
"It's just me and my mom, sir." I say.
"Did you two have a argument or did you do something to offend her?" He continued.
"I... I told her I got saved. She got upset, but I don't think that would've caused her to leave." I said.
"Is she against your religion?" He rubs his stubble on his chin.
"Yes."
"Does she take any medication or drugs or anything else that could cause addiction?" He says.
"She was an alcoholic, but she stopped a few months ago." I said.
He writes down everything i said in his notebook.
"It seems like she ran away from all the stress. Depending on how long the victim is an alcoholic, it takes time to recover and they could have some stress from that. Maybe even depression without rehab." He said. "Plus if she's against your religion, and you told her you converted to Christianity, that added a load. Has she talked about running away in the past?" He asked.
"No, sir." I say quietly I suddenly feel depressed.
"Okay. Thank you for your time. We will contact you if we find her." The police officers leave.
I'm the reason she left?
"I wouldn't feel comfortable if you stayed here by yourself." Pastor Daniel said.
"It's okay. I'm going to a friends house."
That was a lie.
"Okay. I'm so sorry. I hope they find her soon." He gives me a hug and leaves.
When I see his car drive away from the house, I sprint out the door and towards the bridge.
I'm going to end this. Life is getting to hard. I can't be a Christian, I can't stand being bullied anymore, I can't stand the guilt I have, I can't live anymore.

By the time I reach the bridge, my cheeks are soaked with tears. The cold winter air stings my eyes. I hop on the railing of the bridge and look down. My heart beats with fear. This will definitely end me. I hold on with one hand. I think about my life, how everything I done had been a waste.
I notice head lights out of the corner of my eye. A navy blue truck skids to a stop and a familiar figure steps out in a hurry.
"Penelope!" Ethan yells. "What the heck are you doing?" His eyes were full of fear and worry. He steps closer to me.
"Step one foot closer and I'll jump!" I hiss.
"Please, do not do this Penelope." I see a tear fall on his cheek.
He's crying?
"Why not? What do I have to live for? My mom is missing, everyone at school despises me, I'm not even a good Christian. My life is a waist!" I say.
"That's not true. Stop telling yourself lies. None of that is your fault. You are worth so much. Life won't always be fair, but I promise I will be by your side through all of it. Ups and downs. Thick and thin." He stops to wipe his eyes. "You're important to me! I don't know if this will matter to you, but I will tell you the truth." He pauses. "Penelope, I am madly in love with you."
I feel like I'm going to throw up. I look down at the water for a brief time. Suddenly, arms wrap around my waist and lift me off the rail onto the ground.
"No! Let me go!" I cry. Ethan sits down with me in his arms. I try to fight to get away from him.
"I love you Penelope. Please, please don't do this." He cries.
Soon I realize I'm not going to win this. His embrace is to strong for me to break. He carries me back to his truck, buckles me in and locks the door. I feel so weak and helpless. He gets in and starts the engine.
"Where are you taking me?" I ask refusing to make eye contact with him.
"To the hospital." He replied.
"Why?"
"I'm not going to let a person that almost killed themselves go home. You need help." He said.
"I don't need help." I say.
"That's funny. That's exactly what my older sister said."
Older sister?
"She said those same exact words and no one did a thing about it." He pauses. "She killed herself." He was hurt. "I'm not going to let the love of my life die the same way."
I didn't know he had an older sister.
"How did you find me?" I asked.
"You're probably not going to believe me. But God told me to drive across that bridge."