Unexpected

| xxiii | the dark i know well

xxiii~ i don't scream though i know it's wrong

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Jason feels lucky as he holds Erin's hand. They stand in front of a Catholic priest and listen to his old, droning voice. She is beautiful in a white dress that is only a few shades lighter than her skin. The silken fabric clings to her in the most lovely, innocent way. Her dark hair is curled to fall around her face, and minimal make-up has been done to simply highlight the slant of her eyes and the shape of her lips.

Jason has studied his family history. He knows that his obsession has occasionally annoyed Erin, but she allows him anyway. She even got curious when he was researching his Uncle Grayson.

He knows that he is the first one in his family to have a happy life. Even with a rocky start (being born as an unnamed child in the same motel room where his mother later committed suicide is not the most ideal birth situation), he has emerged victorious. He is here; getting married to the girl he loves after maintaining a healthy relationship that lasted through high school and college. The rest of his family has not been so lucky.

His grandparents lost both their children before they themselves died at a fairly young age. His grandmother was lost in a car accident, and a few days later his grandfather committed suicide. He simply could not handle being completely and utterly alone. Their shared funeral ended with their caskets being buried in the same graveyard as their children. Jason does not remember them at all, though there are photos of him with them.

His mother suffered from untreated depression and anxiety most of her life. A teen pregnancy sent her running away from home, leaving behind a confused boyfriend and worrying parents. She wandered around Seattle for months before finally settling down in a motel room to give birth alone. She maintained enough common sense to feed Jason once and clean him and set him away from her. Shortly after she slit her wrists with motel-issued razors. She returned home in a casket.

His uncle was a unique case. Jason learned from his father that his mother never knew that she had a brother. The name Grayson was foreign to Stephanie until she and Duke rummaged through the things in the attic. Jason knows the tragedy of his uncle; a perfect life other than having two distant parents. And then his eighteenth birthday happened, and everything changed for the worst.

The story of his uncle ends gruesomely no matter how delicately it is told.

Jason has succeeded where the rest of them have failed. He will be the first one in a long time to get a happy ending. He will make it happen. Erin squeezes his hand and he smiles at her. As if in another room, the priest says, "You may now kiss the bride,"

Ah, Jason thinks, I have kissed her before and I will kiss her many times more.

And he does.

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Erin knows that she cannot hide the truth from Grayson for much longer. She practices how she will tell him and how to put it delicately enough that it will not invoke his anger. Her biggest fear is that Grayson will be revealed to have as bad of reactions as Phil does.

She is wearing an old t-shirt with holes in the elbows. Grayson's letterman is sitting beside her, but since her room is strangely warm she does not feel the need to wear it. Her socked feet rub against the floor, and in the darkness she can see the little sparks of static that she elicits from the floor.

Grayson should be here soon, she thinks. Her nerves cause her heart to flutter. Something twitches in her face. She cannot stay still.

To her relief, a knock comes soon at her window. Erin stands quickly and hurries to where Grayson sits in the snowy tree. He is holding out a slightly brown banana as if it is a peace offering. She smiles nervously. Grayson seems to understand because he comes in quietly. She sets the banana aside, although it looks awfully good after not having anything but the pop-tarts for two days.