Far Gone

chapter 9: Fresh

Darkness. The partial or total absence of light. Emptiness fills the dark corners i cant reach. Just laying here in the absence of company fills my lungs with emptiness. Waiting not wanting to move a muscle, unable to move a bone. Hope is a light at the end of my tunnel that slowly becomes dimmer by the day. Everytime i flew to the door in hopes that the knocks would be him. Harry. I was only met with a package or mail thats now become meaningless.

Its been a week of constant tapping and waiting. A week of no letters and no light. No calls. No Harry. As I lay on the couch still unmoving i think of all the possibilities of what could be the reason ,any reason of why he would do this. Nothing. No thoughts will form in my mind and im sure thats for the best. Suddenly I get this putrid scent that hits me smack in the face. Looking away from the ceiling for once I try and identify the smell of rotten fish and disappointment. As I look from side to side seaeching for the source I realize the smell is going up into my nose and its none other than me. Whens the last time i showered. Whens the last time I moved from this couch. Groggy and tired from tears that stain my face i get up. The sudden movement make my head spin for a bit feeling like i might black out; but my vision clears and I stand. As im walking to my stairs i can see a bit of light from the blazing sun coming through my curtains. Maybe i should let some light in to this dark place. I prepare my eyes as I snatch back the curtains as the warm outside light hits me in the face. It takes a bit for my eyes to focus but when it does I can see the outside world going about their day. No one noticing my house or the darkness inside it. Everything just goes on normally as if nothing ever happened. I'm scanning the roads and the sidewalk when of all the people I see jogging up my street is Eric. Hes wearing blue shorts with a tight fitting white tank top that shows of his muscles. Why am i staring. He has white running shoes on, black sunglasses and his earphones in stepping to the sound of his own beat. The wind is blowing through his straight golden hair as he chugs along. He must live close by to be going down the one way street. Suddenly he stops on the corner right before my house and takes out his phone, maybe to change the music. He takes off his sunglasses and starts tapping a bit on his phone then slips it back into his pocket. What i didnt expect was to see his forest green eyes to shoot up right at my curtains. It felt like he saw right through me staring straight at my window. I flew back from the window not wanting to be recognized by him. not wanting him to know I was staring. I stood there pressed against the wall for a while and certainly didnt want to peak back out the window. I decide to just head up to the shower and wash away the feeling of eyes on me.

After my long shower of just half standing there and half washing, I finally step out and get dressed. I just slide a plain white t-shirt and some black pants. The reflection of my mirror on my bathroom wall doesnt lie to me and tells me no matter how much I wash im still a mess. Then i hear three hard knocks come from door downstairs. I so desperately wanted it to be Harry as I fly down the stairs waiting for his warm arms to be open and waiting for me to jump into them with tears of joy and relief. Sadly its all just a hope when i snatch open the door only to see Eric. Hes in completely diffrent clothes now. Hes got blue jeans with a black top and his earlier messy hair is now swept up into slanted bun. I just glare with my mouth open not knowing what to say. "Im sorry did I catch you at a bad time?" Eric askes sounding concerned. Finding ny thoughts and words I say " um not really i guess." "well i never got your number back there at the coffee shop because you were in such a rush and i didnt want to press. I was jogging earlier and recognized your car sitting in the drive way and thought I'd drop by." " oh. Yeah sorry it was nothing but some burning toast." There was an akward moment of him just studying my face and then he just blurted out "Are you ok? You seem... down." Was it that obvious? "I...I just.." is all i could muster before tears just started to stream and I could feel the pain of Harry being not home flip in my stomach. Eric put a firm hand on my shoulder and started to whisper what sounded like a poem. "You must do the thing that you think you cannot do..." letting myself feel the words and the the pain come wash over me "Doubt kills more dreams then failure ever will. Louis you are strong and I may not know whats going on but I know that its gonna be ok just hold on." Finally after being a blubbery mess in my door way the tears start to stop and I feel Eric pat on my shoulder. Then when my words come back I finally speak " Thank you Eric, I really needed that cry." " Well i wont ask you to talk about whatever is going on but can you at least walk with me through the park and maybe make a leaf pile?" I thought about his offer not wanting to leave the house just in case harry or any letters came back, but then i thought of just sitting in the house trapped in this dark house with nothing happening. I finally met his gaze those dark green but bright happy eyes and said " yeah I could use some air." His eyebrows jumped up in suprises as if he weren't expecting for me to agree and a slight smirk showed off his pearly whites a bit making ne grin too. I finally slipped away from the doorway to grab my keys from the counter in the kitchen. "wow you have a nice house from what i can see" I completely forgot my manners "oh sorry you can come in if you'd like" He glanced around contemplating stepping in " I think I'll save my grand tour for another time" he said with a smirk. Who said there would be another time I thought to myself. I snatch the keys from the counter and head back to the door locking it behind me as i slip out. But then unlock it in hopes that harry might be back sitting on the couch when i return. Then I turn to Eric "alright lead the way sir."

We start up the street to the park which is only a few block up from where i live. Eric cracks cheesy jokes all the way there making me chuckle at first but then I start to just flat out crack up. "So two potatoes are standing on a corner right? How do you know which one is the prostitute?" "how?" I say preparing. "One of them has a sticker on them saying Idaho!!" I started cracking up laughing at how stupid it is that the joke is even funny. Halfway to the park Eric points out an all blue and white flat and says " I stay there with a roommate " " ahh i thought you lived close" " how did you think that?" " well I saw you walking down my one way street and thought..." I trailed off realizing how creepy i sounded " so that was YOU!! I saw you in your window staring" " I WASNT STARING" I said a bit too loud. " whatever you say" he said smiling to himself. Finally we reach the park with the beautiful tall trees. Orange and red leaves fall scattering the ground making every step crunchy. We head behind the swings and start scooping up piles of fallen leaves and dumping them together until there was huge pile. Eric throws a pine cone at my head and laughs while i turn and stare at him with an open mouth. I grab the nearest stick and run at him. He takes off look back at me smiling. I catch up easy and start jabbing his back. He must me ticklish because he fell after the third jab and started laughing with tears in his eyes. " Ha no one pine cones louis and gets way with it" He reaches up a hand asking for help up. I grab it and snatch him up. " nice grip" he says and I smile feeling good about myself. That is until he picks me clear off my feet and starts marching back to the pile we made. " NOOO" I scream and squirm but he giggles and keeps walking. I try to jab at his back again but before I can reach down I feel the force of my body go down into the crunchy pile and I cant help but laugh because of how much fun it was to sink to the bottom of the pile. He stands back with a hand over his mouth smiling as I get up covered in from hair to foot with the leaves. He chuckles and pulls out his phone snapping a picture. He helps me sweep off the mess but lingers his hand a while too long. I brush off the feeling not wanting to make it too weird. Finally after jumping around in the pile like a bunch of little school girls we finally head back to my house. We stop by Erics flat first " I had a great time with you today. Heres my number so if you ever need anything, anything at all just let me know" I thank him for his kindness and turn to walk away. As i looked back though I never saw him go inside he just kind if stood on the step without moving staring at me. A few blocks later I my house come into view and my heart practically falls to my feet. All traces of happiness from earlier are gone. I see one man and a women standing on my porch with army camouflage uniforms and tan boots knocking on my door looking stern. I hurry up the pathway " im sorry can i help you" I say my voice shaking. " Hello, my name is Dan and this is my partner Susan we are here from the U.S army forces looking for the owner Louis Styles, do you know him?" My heart starts going a million miles and I just want to run inside and pretend they never came. " I'm Louis Tomlinson" "Sir can we come in please we have a few things to discuss" I nod and walk to the door with shaking knees. Pushing the door open I invite the two in. They stay standing but I have a seat. " we have come to find out that Harry went on a recent mission. For confidential reason I cant state his business there but there seemed to have been an attack on his troop and taken hostage" my head starts swimming at the words coming out of his mouth the woman trys to lay a hand on my shoulder for comfort but its like I cant feel anything. Please say they found him. Please say he's safe. "... Weve been searching for a very long time..." no. No. No please. "...they've found two of his troop memebers bodies dead and hes been missing for a month now..." stop please stop. "... Theyve marked him as presumably dead mr Styles... Im sorry." my heart stops and everything goes dark. This time I let it consume me and I slip away.

HEY GUYS IM SOOOO SORRY SCHOOL AND FINALS AND MUSICALS HAVE REALLY HAD MY HANDS TIED ON CONTINUING THIS STORY. BUT NOW ITS SUMMER AND I CAN FINNALY HAVE THE FREE TIME TO UPDATE. YAAY. SOME PRETTY EXCITING STUFF HAS BEEN HAPPENING RIGHT. WELL STAY TUNED IT'LL ONLY GET MORE INTENSE. THANKS FOR MAKING IT THIS FAR. LOVE YOU GUYS. THANK YOU