It's Complicated // H.S & L.P

Chapter 8

WARNING: CONTAINS SOME SELFHARM IN FIRST HALF AND I DONT RECOMMEND READING IT, MAY TRIGGER MEMORIES...

Harry and I discussed a lot of things when something bothered us but it seemed hard this time, I knew deep inside the rumours weren't the main problem but I couldn't decide what it was. When the driver dropped me off at the front gate I said thanks and took a deep breath as I walked up the driveway and to the front door. Turning the key and walking into the quiet house. I put down my bag and kept walking. From the lounge room to the kitchen and past the study there was no sign of Harry. When I walked into the bedroom I heard soft muffled sound coming from the bathroom and I started to worry. As I opened the door I saw Harry sitting on the floor then I saw blood coming from his left arm.

"Oh my, Harry what have you done?" I asked quickly grabbing a towel trying to stop the bleeding.

"This is what you do to me" he answered looking at me with tearful eyes.

"Me, how did I do this? Harry this is stupid" I said now feeling my eyes water. I kneeled down beside him and he adjusted himself.

"I'm sorry I just didn't feel up to going to the gym to release my emotions so I just thought"

"Don't ever do this again, this is ridiculous... are you trying to kill yourself"

"If you're not with me, what's the point of living?"

"Because you have a career and people depend on you, you're fans depend on you"

"But you are everything to me, please don't leave me" he said as I stood up.

"I don't have a choice, if you going to be stupid I can't be the one to blame" I said as I turned the shower on. Harry stood up and without being asked he striped and hopped into the shower. Going through the draws and the cupboard I grabbed all the razors and threw them in the bin. I didn't want to leave Harry alone but I took then chance and went to the kitchen. Pulling out chicken and pasta I put them on to cook and went back to check on Harry. As I walked back into the bedroom I found him putting his underwear on.

"When you're done come into the kitchen so I can patch you up" I said before returning to cooking dinner.

When Harry came out I turned the stove down and pulled out the first aid kit. Considering it was only a small but deep cut, I grab two strips and a bandage out and tried to put Harry back together.

"I'm sorry" He said.

"I know you are, but please don't do this again" I said now putting the bandage on. Harry nodded agreeing with me.

"Thanks for not leaving me"

"I don't have a choice, but since I'm still here I don't want to hear about those rumours" I said before he said anything more. 

"I promise" He said give me a small kiss on the cheek. I watched him walk into the lounge room after I fixed him up then packed the kit away. I mixed the pasta and chicken and added some sauce and let it simmer. I leaned against the bench watching Harry on the couch. I didn't understand why he was acting like this. I know it was upset about the rumours but I felt there was more to it. I was then distracted by my phone.

RE: Liam.

How are things going? Did you work it out?

Another message from Liam; I looked at the message then back at Harry. I was unsure about what I would text back, I didn't know whether to let the guys know about Harry or not. Biting my lip I texted Liam back.

RE: Leigh-Anne.

Things are fine, we have worked it out. Talk to you later.

Simple but effective; was my best move. Dinner smelt good so I dished it up and putting leftovers in a small freezer container the put it in the freezer. I set the table up and called Harry. As he walked over I placed his food on the table then took a place next to him.

"Smells good babe" Harry said as he pushed himself closer to the table. I gave a small smile and slowly started to eat.

After dinner Harry put the dishes in the dishwasher and joined me on the couch. Harry layed his head on my lap and I massaged his head as we watched the news. We didn't talk much which in some ways was a good thing but I wanted to ask if there was something else on his mind. It hadn't been my day, week or even my month so I asked him.

"Harry, babe, is there something other than what's happen with us bothering you?"

"No why" He answered.

"I'm just worried about you" I said but he just shrugged it off, so I left it alone. There was nothing interesting on the news so I scrolled through my twitter feed on my phone. To my surprise there was talk about Liam and I and fans were asking whether I broke up with Harry. Liam had posted but it was about the tour starting on Monday. Going onto Harry's page I noticed he hadn't tweeted anything for a few days. 

"What time do you need to be at the studio tomorrow?" I asked him. Yet again he shrugged me off. I wasn't going to bug him so I decided to send a quick text to Liam.

RE: Leigh-Anne

Hey just wondering what time Harry needs to be at studio tomorrow?

RE: Liam

About 11

Is everything ok?

RE: Leigh-Anne

Thanks

I can't say but maybe you can tomorrow when you see him

RE: Liam

One quick question, are you coming on tour?

RE: Leigh-Anne

One question too many, I will be but not the whole time

Goodbye Liam x

RE: Liam

Bye beautiful x

After texting Liam I got up leaving Harry on the couch and went to the bathroom. Looking at my reflection I thought back on what happened today. I felt stupid for letting this silence come between Harry and I, but he wasn't helping the issue. Taking a few deep breaths I climbed into the shower, washed my hair and let the hot water run along my back. How my life did suddenly became so dark, I don't know. Right now I want to scream for help, tell someone about Harry but something inside was telling me not to.