London Bridges

Chapter 19: Proposal

"Will you marry me?"

Liam's immediate response is to laugh. He thinks Louis is still half asleep and blissed out in the afterglow of last night, that he doesn't really mean it. Louis isn't laughing with him, though. He's pushing himself up into a sitting position and he's looking at Liam with a small, humorless smile tugging at his lips like he's waiting for it to click.

And it does click. Liam realizes that Louis is completely serious and he's suddenly thrown onto a rollercoaster of emotions and rationalizations.

Louis can see the inner turmoil going on behind Liam's eyes. It doesn't hurt him. He expected it, he knew Liam would have a million thoughts at once, that he'd run through every possible outcome and freak out over every potential obstacle before he could allow himself to think about whether he wants it or not. Its how Liam reacts to every big decision, and Louis loves him anyway. So he sits in silence, allows him to go nuclear, and waits for Liam to sort himself out.

When Liam goes still but makes no effort to speak, Louis makes his move. He takes Liam's hand in his and brings it to his mouth, brushing his lips against Liam's knuckles. Liam lets out a shaky exhalation of breath.

"I wish I could give you the world, Li," Louis says. "I wish I could take away all your fears and anxieties, all your bad memories. It kills me that I can't. But I can give you all of my love, I can give you my loyalty and my support. I can make you a part of my family, and we can build one of our own together. I was waiting, for the perfect time and the perfect ring, but none of that matters. You matter, Liam, you're the only thing that matters to me. I want to marry you, I want to have kids with you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. What I want more than anything, though, is for you to be happy and have the life you've always wanted. So, Liam James Payne, if you think you can have that life with me, forget about every reason you just came up with that has you thinking no, and just say yes."

Liam is crying. Like, full on ugly crying. He's always going to remember this moment full of snots, and messy hair, and morning breath. He'll also remember it as perfect, though. He'll remember the warmth, the overwhelming feeling of love, the unbridled happiness flowing over him.

"Yes," Liam finally chokes out. "Yes, I'll marry you. I can't think of anything I want more."

"Are you sure?" Louis asks.

The question makes Liam laugh as he crashes his lips against Louis'.

"Yes, I'm sure. I want to marry you and I want everything you want. Is that really so surprising?"

"No," Louis says. "I'm not surprised, just incredibly grateful. I had a good feeling you'd say yes, but actually hearing you say it, I wish I had recorded it."

Liam laughs again. "I can say it again if you'd like."

They stay in bed for another few hours. They use the proposal as an excuse to acquaint themselves with their newly engaged bodies. They talk about what they expect now that they're fiancees, that they don't want the word to bring any drastic changes or unnecessary pressure. Liam is worried about the reaction he'll get, but he tells Louis he wants a long engagement. Louis agrees whole heartedly, he wants Liam to be able to focus on school. He couldn't wait to propose anymore, but now that its settled that they're on the track to a proper marriage, he can find the patience.

Louis makes Liam say yes a few more times. Then they clean up Mark's house and they head out to Jay's where they promised they'd have dinner before heading back to London.

"Can't you guys stay a little longer?" Lottie asks as she walks the boys to their car.

"Sorry, Lots, I've gotta get back for class," Liam says, pressing a kiss into the girl's blonde hair.

"We'll be back soon, love," Louis adds. "Maybe you'll be back home living with Mum by then, yeah?"

Lottie rolls her eyes. "Subtle," she says, making Liam giggle.

"Subtlety has never been my most redeeming quality, but she wants you home. I told her to give you my room, theres no sense in keeping it a shrine to me, anyway."

"Its not about the room, Lou."

"You can't keep blaming her for everything, Lottie. Seriously, I was a mess and she did what had to be done. She was protecting all her kids."

"I know that," Lottie says. "I didn't get it then, but I do now. Dad needs me, Lou. Mum has Dan and the other girls, but Dad is all alone. Besides, I'm here practically all the time, and I stay here when Dad's away for work."

"It's not your job to take care of Mark. He's a grown man, you're still a kid."

"By that logic, its not my job to take care of Mum, either," Lottie points out, her tone hard in a way that reminds Louis of being scolded by their mother. "I'm happy living with Dad, Lou. Surely you can understand the attraction of having a place away from the chaos. Or has London turned you into a hypocrite?"

"Okay, point taken," Louis says, holding his hands up in surrender. "Bloody hell, you're most like Mum when you're pissed."

"Don't be cross with him, Lots," Liam tries to smooth things over. "He's just trying to look out for everyone. Anyway, if you're having a strop, he won't tell you our secret."

"What secret?" Lottie asks. Shes grinning now, and Liam rolls his eyes, completely endeared, because the two siblings don't see it but Lottie is most like Louis in the way their anger erupts and evaporates from one second to the next.

"Well I don't know if I want to tell you now," Louis teases.

"Fine, be a wanker," Lottie pouts, sticking her tongue out at him. "Liam, I've always liked you better, whats the news?"

Liam laughs. "You've always liked me better? Even though we've only known each other a year?"

"Are you guys are gonna tell me, or not?"

"I may have asked Liam to marry me this morning," Louis says nonchalantly.

"And I may have said yes."

Lottie squeals in delight, making both lads laugh. "You've been engaged the entire day and didn't say anything?"

"Yeah, well that's usually how secrets work," Liam says, still chuckling.

"Seriously, Lottie, keep it to yourself for now. I just want to enjoy the blissful happiness for a little while before we have to field the questions and judgments from our parents."

"They won't hear anything from me," Lottie promises. "But for what its worth, I think its fantastic. Congratulations, lads."

Louis drives them back to London, and as he steals glances at Liam asleep in the passenger seat, he's happier than he's ever been. When they get home Silver greets them excitedly. Louis's eyes are tired but his body is buzzing from the last five hours of sitting, so he takes the dog out for a night run. Liam is revising at the table when they get back in. Louis laughs fondly, prepares some tea for the two of them, and grabs the flash cards to quiz Liam.

"Li," Louis groans into his chest hours later. "Either you're sleeping past your alarm or news about our engagement leaked and we're getting a visit from your mother. Whatever it is, turn off your fucking phone, love."

"Its too early," Liam mumbles. "Its your phone."

Louis huffs grumpily as he searches around for the source of the noise, knowing that its most definitely Liam's ringtone going off and the other lad is being a lazy arse.

"Liam, wake up," Louis says, his body going cold when he finds the phone and sees the dozens of missed messages. "Its your dad."