London Bridges

Chapter 17: Ziall Revisited

"Hey, Nialler, what do you want me to order for dinner?" Zayn calls from the kitchen.

Louis and Liam are away in Doncaster, so its up to him to ensure that the Irish lad subsists on more than crisps and soda.

"Actually, I was thinking we could go out to eat," Niall says.

"Out? Like to Nandos or something?"

"Yeah," Naill says. "Wait, no."

"Ookayy, wanna help me out here a bit, Niall?"

Niall mentally kicks himself in the arse, because this is definitely not how he wanted this conversation to go. He takes a deep breath and steadies himself to try again.

"Doyouwannagoonadatewithmetonight?" Niall rushes out.

Zayn blinks back in confusion. He's almost positive he heard correctly, but the words came out of Niall so fast and jumbled.

"A date?" Zayn asks.

"Yeah," Niall confirms. "I just thought, with Lou and Liam out of town, it would be a good time to give this a proper shot. No pressure coming back home, you know?"

"Right," Zayn says, his lips pulling into a smile. "That sounds brilliant, actually."

Niall lets out a relieved breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

They go to a local Italian place they had ordered takeaway from a half dozen times but had never been in to sit down properly.

"I didn't think you'd come back," Zayn says halfway through dinner.

Niall pauses before answering, allowing the waiter to refill their glasses.

"I was only home for a week," Niall finally admits. "It wasn't the same."

Zayn nods in understanding. "Yeah, Bradford was great when you were there with me, but then you left and it just didn't feel right anymore."

"Don't you think its weird?" Niall asks. "We were so eager to get out and be home with our families, and now its like we're completely out of place there."

"It makes sense, I guess," Zayn says, shrugging his shoulders. "We're not the same kids we were when we left. The five of us are more of a family to each other than we are to anyone back home. I reckon Louis and Liam have the right idea, starting over someplace new."

Niall saddens at the inclusion of Harry. They all still feel his absence whenever they're together. It's rare for Louis's eyes not to go dark in the middle of a laugh at least once when they're all hanging out in the loving room. Liam is always able to silently soothe him, brushing his hair out of his eyes or nuzzling his neck never fails to get the sparkle back, even if he's a bit sadder after. They notice it, though, and it makes them pause. They have to remind themselves to keep living.

"I wish Hazza held on long enough to figure that out," Niall says, reaching across the table to brush his fingers against the back of Zayn's knuckles.

Zayn laces their hands together, staring at their intertwined fingers in curiosity. Its heavy conversation for a first date, but this is Niall and they've always been able to talk about anything.

"Everything changed for us after Harry," he muses. "I didn't think I'd ever be on a date with a bloke, holding his hand."

Niall grins, his ears pinking up in a blush. "Neither did I," he admits.

"I actually quite like it."

Niall's smile widens.