Scars||Ed Sheeran

01

"it's just a phase" she said.

At first I wanted to think I was thinking about it too much and that it would go away because they were just your typical teenagers right?

It didn't go away.

The constant bullying just wouldn't stop. I feared going to school or going out on the weekends because what if they see me in public and humiliate me just like they do at school?

Usually I'd stand up for myself to show them I won't let them get the best of me. But it became tiring. Even a few reports to the guidance counselor I thought would help but it didn't.

My parents started to notice a change in my attitude towards school and my mood swings but I convinced them I was fine and just told them:

"It's just a phase!" Like my mom said.

My dad wanted to let me do therapy but my mother didn't want to accept the fact that something was going on and I wasn't happy at school.

Something was going on of course. I was being pushed around by a few girls at my school for God knows what. When I'd try to make myself​ unknown they'd do some dumb shit to make me the center of attention.

Like that one time I had a crush on this really cute guy in my biology class he came up to and they just​ popped into our conversation telling him I was a lesbian. Which I wasn't.

It was that day I decided I was sick of their bullshit. I went home and told my parents about but my mom being herself said they were just messing around. My dad tried to comfort me about but it wasn't enough I needed my mom too.

I needed her to see what was happening to just show me an ounce of attention instead of giving it all to younger sister. That night I locked myself in my bathroom and did the dumbest thing ever.

Cutting.

I never thought I'd resort to something like that. But I felt like I deserved the pain. It's like they drove me to my limit and I no longer wanted to live in this world.

Five painkillers later that night made me feel like I was high, my eyes were heavy and my hands were shaking but it didn't stop me from swallowing almost half of the bottle.

I woke up the next day in the hospital to find my mom beside me crying while my dad comforted her. From that day on she never took her eyes off me.

••

"Riley are you listening?" The sound of my mom's voice took my attention away from my biology notes. I wasn't actually reading them I just wanted to give her the impression that I didn't want to talk.

"No not really," I truthfully replied. I could feel her glaring at me but I could careless​.

"I was asking if you want me to take you to therapy or your dad?"

She always ask this question on a Monday which is when I have my therapy session. And I always give her the same answer.

"No thanks I'll let dad take me," I grip my school bag in my hand as I get out the car shutting the door. I waved to my mom then head onto the compound of Ridgewood high school.

I sat in the empty class which I was half an hour early for. These quite times I take myself to listen some good music by Onerepublic and Bastille.

I felt a light tap on my shoulder and pulled out one of earphones to see a ginger haired kid looking at me with his ocean blue eyes.

I've never seen him before he's probably new?

"Is this seat taken?" His strong British accent washing over me.

I shook my head seeing as I'm not the type to talk to others. Call me antisocial.

He sits in the seat before me then turn around a few seconds.

"You don't seem to talk much but can I ask you question?"

I nod.

"Is the teacher nice?" He asked referring to the social studies teacher who should be here in any minute.

"Yeah just don't forget to do your homework though," I inform him.

"That's fair enough," he smiles lightly.

So yeah I'm rewriting this because I have some new ideas for it.

I like to recommend songs to others so I'll do that in every chapter 😀

Song: Afraid by The Neighborhood

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