Substitute Soulmate

Jumping Hurdles

Instinctively pulling her hand away, Namjoo looked elsewhere. A cold sense of shock passed through her sharply. Simultaneously realizing she just rejected him but drowning into doubt, Namjoo stepped back.

"I need to go," she excused and quickly left.

Returning home with a blank mind Namjoo never minded Olly nor the mess he'd created. Cotton fluffs littered her home but Namjoo passed them. Throwing open her closet she pulled out one outfit after another mindlessly. Catching herself she sat down on her bed and stared down at her hands. She had once touched Yeol with them. Now she was touching someone else.

Marriage was a whole new level different from merely dating. Namjoo had just started walking a new path. She wasn't prepared to tread back down a familiarly walked road.

"I'm sorry," Sehun apologized at lunch. "I spoke too soon."

"Lets talk about it later," Namjoo interjected. She wasn't ready yet. She needed more time to think. To sort out her feelings. To know what she really felt and understand what she wanted to say to Sehun.

He left her alone after work. She didn't even promise she'd call. Quietly forfeiting to her new struggle, she went home and took Olly out for a walk. She had no appetite that evening, so she didn't eat. Sitting on the floor to pass time she watched Olly play with a new toy she got him. When her doorbell rang she expected it to be Sehun. She always expected the person on the other side of the door to be him now, so when she opened the door she was surprised it wasn't him.

Yeol's mother smiled up at her. She had a grocery bag with her. "I knew you'd be in."

Loss for words Namjoo let the woman in. Suddenly, it was painfully awkward for her. The last they'd seen each other was when Mina took the words out of Namjoo's mouth. She did regret that she'd been unable to be the bearer of the news.

"Well, hello there," Yeol's mother greeted Olly who'd trotted over happily. "It looks like you haven't had dinner yet."

"Mother..." the words quickly flew out and Namjoo bit her tongue. Was it even right of her to call the woman that anymore? "You don't...you don't have to be here."

"Let me cook for you first and we'll talk. All right?" her voice was so soft, so calm. It was soothing to hear, yet at the same time it broke Namjoo's heart somewhere. Unable to refute Namjoo let the woman do as she liked. When a bowl of warm food landed on the table, Namjoo obediently ate.

She was so sorry. To Yeol's parents. That she had to move on and couldn't always be with them. That she was starting to love someone else, but she wanted to say that it didn't mean she would forget Yeol. That she wasn't replacing Yeol.

Namjoo couldn't say those words. Her throat ached as she swallowed.

Halfway through the meal, Namjoo gave up and set her spoon down. Yeol's mother who had been watching carefully reached over to touch her hand.

"It's ok, child," she comforted. "I know."

Even if the earth went under, Namjoo swore she had loved Yeol's parents like her own. She had never abandoned them. She had kept her word to Yeol. She never broke her promise to him.

"I'm sorry," Namjoo cried and wiped her tear.

"Your father and I know your heart. We aren't angry, we aren't disappointed. I saw the way he looked at you and I can tell he's a very good man. I am happy for you, Namjoo." She soothingly rubbed the back of Namjoo's hand. Nodding her head, "Yeol wouldn't want you to be alone forever. Bring him over again. Your father would like to meet him again. This time, I'll cook for him."