"Mister Perfect" (EDITING)

"I...I'm..."

What does Mizuka mean by that? He's that annoying journalist!? How? Why? how would he do that to me...? Why didn't he tell me about this earlier! I'm really confused right now. Please let this all be a joke, please...it has to be a joke...right?

"Yo-You're joking...right?"

The teal haired male stood silent as his gaze was constantly at the ground.

"Mizuka...Please tell me that you are joking..." I feel pain, I don't know what kind of pain it is...but I don't like it, not even one bit. This pain, it's different from the other types of pains I have felt, this pain...it hurts my chest, it hurts my head, it hurts to just simply breathe, it hurts...my heart.

Again, Mizuka stood silent like he was a T.V that was placed on 'mute'. I don't know why, but his silence makes this pain more agonizing and harder to bear.

"Mizuka...so, you are Iroha?" I speak out as I feel anger and sadness swell up inside me.

"...I..."

"Tell me! are you Iroha!" The same wet things from earlier begin to fall from my eyes. This I can't take this pain, I don't want this pain.

"...I..."

"Mizuka, How could you do this to me! how can you keep such a thing away from me! how...can you lie to me...I thought we were friends!" My eyes began to grow more with these wet things.

"Shinji...I..."

"Say something!" I shout at Mizuka as he doesn't say anything about this.

"Shinji...I...I'm sorry..."

"What? Sorry? Sorry for what!? That you lied to me? That you told me your real identity!? That you befriended me knowing you was creating false things about me!?" My voice became more painful to use as I pour my feelings to Mizuka

"Shinji...we are friends...is that I--"

"You what! No, you aren't my friend! Friends wouldn't do such things! Why, Mizuka! Why would you do such a thing? Why Would a friends, as you so say, do such a thing!"

"Shinji...I --"

"No, you did nothing! nothing at all! Was our friendship all just a lie!? Was...that confession from earlier...a lie?" I balled my fists tightly as my mind and mouth keeps on shouting at Mizuka, also, that only causes more and more tears to fall.

"I thought I could trust you! I thought I finally had someone that would care for me, someone...that I could share the same feelings for...someone...I could love...--"

"Enough! let me speak Shinji! all you did this time is let out all your words out! But...did it ever cross your mind how I felt!? Did you even think of the guilt that I had!? Did you even try to open your mind and think of why I didn't tell you!? Did you even listen to what I had to say!?"

Mizuka's words kept me and made me into that muted T.V. I didn't know what to say...what do I say? Mizuka is right, during all this time, I never gave him a chance to explain himself. What have I done? I humiliated myself...but, what if his reason isn't a good one? His words brought me to shame as my gaze lowers to the floor.

"No...I..."

"You what!?.. Assume that everyone is trying to cause you sadness..? Assume that someone that has been trying to gain your trust for moths now and just recently gained it would betray you like that...!? Shinji, I am not like them..! Don't you see..? I even risked being expelled for you..! I risked my identity for you..! I risked everything for you..! All this time, I was trying to protect you..! Yet, you don't see it..! You only see your anger...you only see your pain..! Not everything is going to be given to you on a silver platter..! Not everything revolves around you..! Heck, you say you want to love...you say you want to have feelings for someone...I call that I filthy lie..! You're lying..! Liar..! I'm not the false one here, you are..! You are the one that has been lying...and...what's worse is...you've been lying to yourself...to me...that's the worst kind of lie there is!"

"I am not a liar! You're the one that--"

"That what? Tell me? The one that has been protecting you this whole time? The one that still is your friend after this dilemma! The one that is still with you right now! The one that still and always will have feelings for you whether you accept them or not. Shinji...I am not trying to be against you...I never was and I never will..." his shouting turned into a soft and gentle tone.

"I...just don't know what to believe right now..." I mumble as my tears begin to dry, I no longer feel that horrible pain...I now feel an immense sadness.

"No one is saying that you have to believe me...no one is saying anything....what I am trying to tell you is that I love you...and no one else...Shinji, I did this all out of love for you.." his soft an gentle tone is like I was cuddling a teddy bear.

What? What was I thinking...how come I didn't consider his feelings this whole time...I only spoke out of anger and my sudden feelings. Mizuka is right, how was I so stupid? How can I forget about his say in this friendship? How can I love someone if...I am so self centered...I'm such an idiot. I just made a big commotion about my own blindness and I was too blind to even notice it.

I feel those wet things grow in my eyes again, this time, it wasn't pain that caused them to fall, it was my errors that made them fall like a river.

"Mi-Mizuka...I...I'm so sorry, You're right...I--"

"I don't want to be right...I have always been right...but...this time...I want to be wrong for once...Shinji, tell me that I'm wrong, tell me that I am selfish for doing such things for love...tell me...please.."

"No...Mizuka, You're right..." I shake my head as my gaze rises and looks directly into Mizuka's perfect eyes, he has been right all this time. I still don't understand why he wants to be wrong.

"Please don't say that..." I feel his hand reach over and land on my shoulder, his eyes look apologetic, yet miserable. My eyes widened as I look into his flaxen eyes. This...has made me realize something. Something that I don't know quite yet, but later on I want to know like if I'm reading a book. That thing I am talking about...is affection.

Mizuka gave so much of it to me, so much of his time he used to write those things, so much effort he has done to get where he is right now and life. So much patience he has had with all of my nonsense and my antisocial acts.

I don't know what this feel like, but I know what it looks like. Love, and Mizuka has shown me more than enough of it to prove himself. To prove that he really loves me.

"Mizuka...You really do love me..." again, my tears fall from my eyes as my hand reaches over to my mouth, "You really do..." I say in small sobs as my mouth is covered. I don't know this feeling like the other ones, but I kind of like this feeling.

"Yes, Shinji...I have...and I always will" His tone was still soft and gentle, I still cannot believe how calm he is about all if this right now. Even at times like this, he is expressing his love for me.

"Mizuka...I am so sorry...I didn't mean to yell at you...I was just blinded by anger-- I am really sorry...can you forgive me...?" My loud sobs calm down as my ruby eyes look directly at the male, as my eyes are drenched with tears.

"Shinji...there is no need for apologies. In fact...I owe you one, I am very sorry that I didn't tell you sooner...I was afraid of this same thing that is happening right now..." I feel his hand touch my cheek as he began to wipe my tears away.

Again, his words have me silent as my eyes stare into Mizuka's eyes. I feel so sorry...yet, I feel so loved. I don't know how to handle my feelings...but... That's why I have Mizuka, for he can show me how to handle them.

I want to have feelings for him...and I think I already have. "Shinji? Are you going to talk or stare into my eyes?" I hear his voice dance in my ears as my body began to act on it's own.

I lean over, silently, and seal my lips with the man I want to learn how to love.

__________________

Sooooo...

WHO'S HAPPY? BECAUSE I AM!

I AM REALLY SATISFIED WITH THIS CHAPTER...ALSO...CAN YOU TELL THAT I'M EXCITED SINCE I GOT THIS DONE IN 12 HOURS!!

Anyways! I just love this chapter!!

See you next chapter baii baii!

-Twilasky