After Pam and I got to their house with a million of bags. I put the bags on the table and ran upstairs to Jake's room. To see Jake, whom I haven't seen since last night. And since I'm really close to him I don't bother knocking on his door and walk in like if it was my own room. I instantly regret doing that when I see Jake on top of a girl kissing her and taking her close off. My heart drops, I think I was starting to catch feelings for him but I was afraid that I would ruin our friendship if I told him. I quickly run out the room hoping they didn't realize I was there. I needed to relax so I just ran home.
It's night time now. I'm currently doing my makeup before Jake comes in my room without knocking. "The door is there to knock then for you to come in after I allow you to come in" I tell him. "Oh really? Because I don't remember you knocking before you came into mine", He tells me while crossing his arms. "Whatever I don't care now bye" I yelled. "Nope" he says and I roll my eyes at him. "Where are you going to this pretty?!" he asks. "None of your business" I reply while putting on lipstick. "I'm your best friend which is why I need to know everything that happens in your life, And if not then there's no trust between us" he says then I turn my body and face him.
"Oh really? I have to tell you everything that happens in my life but you don't?, Do you really want to talk about trust Jake? Let's talk about trust, who is that girl that you were on top of this morning? What do you write in that journal that is so important and that no one can ever see!?" I yelled at him with frustration. When I see him looking down playing with his fingers. He didn't answer, "That's what I thought" I told him. So I walked out my room and called Chance to come and pick me up to go to the party. After 10 minutes I see them pull up on my drive way and I hop in the car. "What's up with you are you okay?" Logan asks me. "Yeah thanks for asking let's just get away from here" I tell him while sitting down next to him in the car and putting my head on his shoulder. So many questions going through my mind that only Jake could answer but he didn't seem willing to. All I could ask my self was who is that girl?, His girlfriend, A friend with benefits or what? And what is in that journal that no one can read?.
I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize how much time had passed and that we had arrived at our destination. Logan hops off the car, holds my hand helping me get out of the car. Then we all walked towards the big house by the lake. When we enter all I see are sweaty body dancing against each other. Everyone is drunk and some are high. It was really crowded so we tried to go somewhere where it's less crowded but I got lost in the process. I look around me and I couldn't spot my friends anywhere. I yelled their names but no one could hear me because of how loud the music was. I started getting anxiety as people start dancing around and on me. "Come on drink this and relax" I hear a random guy tell me. But I refused thinking he could have put something in it but he insisted. You know what, screw it. That way I can get Jake off my mind. I drink it and I feel my throat burning but I needed more so I filled my cup with more.
At this point, I'm drunk. I'm aware of what is going on around me though.
For example, I know I'm grinding on that guy who is shirt less and drunk as well. I also know that it's hella late and Pam will kill me if she sees me like that. And of course I know that Jake is with that girl again. Dammit! Why do I have to keep thinking about him. "Come on Tessa, this is your night you need to relax" I told my self. I take another shot and grab the guys arm leading him upstairs. At first he looks confused then he realizes what I'm about to do. I push him on the bed and lock the door. I got on him and started kissing him on his neck then down his abs. Damn he's hot. Then I started untieing his belt and look up to him smirking.
Then it hits me. What the hell am I doing!?. I was about to lose my virginity to a guy whose name I don't even know. "I'm sorry I can't do this". I say while getting off him but he grabs my arm and pulls me back on him. "I can" he says while flipping us over. He takes my shirt off and kisses my chest while I try to push him away from me. "Help!, Help!" I yell but no one could hear me because of the really loud music. The guy takes my short off and I beg him for mercy. But he doesn't listen to me. I hear a big bang on the door we turn around, and see Jake breaking the door and entering the room.
"Get away from her" Jake yells at the unknown guy. Here's the problem with Jake, he can't control his anger most of the time. When he gets mad it's like something is taking over his body. "Well what if I don't want to?" says the unknown guy and shoves his tongue into mouth. Then Jake pushes him to the ground and starts punching him harder on the face. "Jake enough already!" I yell and hold Jake's fist making him stop. Jake turns and looks at me and I tell him to let the guy go. As soon as Jake let's him go the guy started to run out the room."Get dressed", he orders me while throwing me my clothes. "I love it when your a tough guy", I tell him while bitting my lip. "I don't have time for games Tessa now let's go" he tells me.
I go closer to him and push him against the wall. I feel his breath getting slower as I slip my hand under his shirt touching his abs. My hand travels down his v line I grab his butt roughly and he slightly jumps. "I love you", I say. "that's not an a propriate way to say this" he replies. "JUST SAY YOU LOVE ME! SAY IT FOR ONCE PLEASE! I get you don't like to say it but I want to hear it. I need to hear it Jake please" I tell him. He looks at me in the eyes before speaking up. "You're really drunk" he tells me. I walked out the room really sad. So he really doesn't love me after all😢. How much of a fool could I be for believing he did. Even as a friend he never said he loved me. I was just assuming he did since I did. I couldn't spend a day without him and he...Ugh. all of these thoughts go around in my head until I bumped into someone.
I look up to see Logan and fall into his arms crying. He holds me tightly making me feel safe in his embrace. I ask him to drive me to my place and he agrees. When we get to my house, he helps me go upstairs and he puts me in my bed. "Good night princess" he says kissing my forehead. He turns his back at me about to leave but I grab his arm and he turns to look at me again. "Stay" is all I say he nods and takes his shoes off. I make some space for him and he lays next to me smiling. I take his arm and rap it around my waist before I cuddle into his chest feeling as safe as ever. I don't want this night to end. I want to have him by my side every night but I know I can't.
I wake up to Logan's face. He is so cute that I kiss him on the cheek making him wake up. "Sorry" I whisper "it's fine I liked it" he says in a sleepy voice and we both laugh. "Do you wanna talk about... Last night?" he asked "Umm... something happened and... Jake and I had an argument", "Oh, that was it? And I got worried you should of told me earlier" he says and I look at him confused. "What do you mean 'that was it'? Isn't that an important issue" I asked him. Honestly I'm getting a little mad because I feel awful thanks to what happened with Jake and I and he pretends like it's nothing. "Nope, I know that y'all can't stand a day without each other so it should be fine" he tells me. "Not this time Logan he doesn't love me" I say and Logan laughs. Ugh dose he really want me to kill him or what (she thinks that in a playful way). "He loves you so much but he just can't say it, you know how shy Jake is, He always talks about you Tessa, And about what you do together, Don't doubt his love Tessa" I look straight into Logan's eyes and hug him tightly. "Thank you" I whispered. What he said had made me feel much better so I decided to text Jake.
