You broke me ( matt espinosa fanfic)

1:30 am, I'm sitting here alone in the dark. My mind is full of thoughts that won't shut up. I haven't been sleeping very well since the last time that I spoke to him, maybe it's because I just really miss him or just because....... There's no reason at all, maybe it's just some weird fucked up shit because I haven't even gone out with this guy, he was juste some kid that hit on me and made me laugh , but I guess somewhere between all stupid lame jokes, I fell in love. But when he left? It was hell, it still is! It's been a 1 year and 3 months since I last saw him for a full week. The last time I saw him he was back at my school, (some say he's coming back) he walked in to my English class and I was just like WTF but ever since then I've been having trouble sleeping which brings us to tonight. It's Monday morning, I have have to get up in 6 hours but I event even gone to bed yet. I don't understand how a single soul could have so much impact on me, is it even humanly possible for this to happen to somebody?

It's now 3:45 and I've been staring at a wall for about 30 minutes now and I find it so interesting that a wall just sits there for its hole life and observes everybody's mental breakdowns or everybody's happy moment, it just observes everything that happens in ones life, does it wish that it could have a life or is it happy with being a wall? It doesn't even need to be insecure because it's a wall, to most, the bigger the wall the better! Does it give petty on people like me, that are up late at night or does it just laugh at your problem or- " Time to get up Rose!!"

"I'm up mom" did a just really stair at a wall for 3 bourse contemplating its life? Wow I need help...

As I walk to my closet a happen to glance outside its was pretty gloomy out witch is weird since I live in California but hey.

Considering the weather I decided to wear a grey sweater and some black leggings with combat boots. After changing a looked myself in the mirror noticing that I had bags under my eyes due to lack of sleep and my eyes looked broken, I just looked broken, I was paler then usual. Applying so liquid consiler under my eyes and then applying some eye liner and mascara. I decided to straiten my long brown air. After about 20 minutes I was done and had no other time to 'fix' my appearance if needed so I just walked past the mirror and grabbed my back and phone and went downs stairs.

I don't usually eat in the morning so I said bye to my mom and walked to school.

-------- AT SCHOOL--------

" hey Rose!!!!" My best friend Ally said.... More like screamed to me " hey" I said "what's wrong is everything ok??" I couldn't tell her about what's happening, ya she was my best friend but she would never look at me the same way if she ever found out, I couldn't tell anybody for that matter..... I was alone... " ya everything is fine! Just don't really feel like going to history ya know??" " ya.. I don't want to go.... But hey I heard that there's going to be a new kid today!" In that moment my heart stopped betting, like everything around me was in slow mo, my breathing became rapid, my vision gone blurry a bit, I was lost. Part of me wanted it to be him because I missed him so much but the other part didn't want it to be him because if I wanted any chance to get better I knew that he would have to be far far away from me. " Rose? Rose? Rose!" " So-orry I spaced out there for a moment" " it's ok let's get to class before Madam bitch gives us detention for being late! Hahah" " nice new name for her by the way" I said with a wink.

--------IN CLASSE----------

I've been sitting here 'listening' the Madame bitch( as Ally now calls her) talk about I don't even know what but I do know that's it's boring as fuck. She finally stopped talking when there was I knock on the door, Ally gave me a knowing look and I was having trouble breathing this was the moment, the moment I may or may not come face to face with the boy who destroyed my life.everything was in slow mo. Everybody was talking about everything and anything because the teacher was out right? Who doesn't talk when the teacher is gone? But I wasn't talking, I was waiting, I don't exactly know what for but- my thoughts were interrupted by the door opening and when I made eye contacted with the person coming through the door it's was like it was only me and him, all the noise disappeared it was me and him. Me and Matthew Lee Espinosa. It took just one look to make me fall in his trap again. He made my life hell when he left but nobody could ever replace the feeling he gives me. I'm i really letting myself fall in love with him again?

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(A/N)

So what do you think about my first chapter I know its long in the beginning but the next chapter is going to be more about Rose and Matt so please comment what you think so that I can continue with this 👍