Hermione Granger is scared. The nightmares are frequent and sleep is rare. Her relationship with Ron is not what she thought it was. Stuck in a circle of despair she is trying hard to regain the famed Gryffindor courage while maintaining appearance...
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~ Hermione granger
Breakfast had been an awkward affair. Harry had been quiet, Ron had noticed her absence in the morning. He questioned her immediately, frown deeply etched into his face , touching his ginger hair.
He was agitated, she hadn't told him that she would be taking an early bath, which had resulted in the trio unable to head off to breakfast together. She had apologized immediately, not wanting to cause a scene in the Great hall. Not having enough energy right from the beginning of the day to argue.
After all Ronald barely heard her anymore. She quickly settled next to him, as he pulled her next to himself, his hand a painful hold on her thigh. She winced, choosing to let his anger simmer down, while nibbling on her toast. His hold gradually decreased in intensity , now stroking her thigh through her robe . She felt the now familiar acidic feeling bubbling, but swallowed it along with the pumpkin juice. Quickly getting up she explained to Ron that she needed to go to Ancient Runes , and scurried from the Great Hall.
A pair of silver eyes watched her depart...
Transfiguration had been next. Reunited with Harry and Ron. She however had reached the class earlier which meant that her place was closer to the Slytherin's tables. Ron walked in late, Harry a ghost that followed. She had been relieved. At least this was a class she could work in. Aside from the taunts thrown at her from the Slytherins, she had space from Ronald, a rare occurrence and one she would utilize well. Owing to her increased stress and exhaustion her usually sharp analytical mind had failed to notice that the usually loud taunts and hurtful comments from a certain platinum haired Slytherin were missing.
Lunch followed. She was in his grip once more, feeling like the poor Welsh Frostkillers they were studying, trapped in the hutch Hagrid had built. He pulled out her potions homework and read though the scroll, while he chewed on a chicken leg.
She was tired. She would have stopped him.
She used too, but she was tired ....
Potions followed Lunch. She used a cleaning charm on her parchment to get rid of the curry stains Ronald had left. She chose to sit next to Harry, on the edge of the bench earning her a stare from Ronald. He didn't say anything however, Snape had entered the classroom. He would find time to later anyway, he always did.
As the evening approached, the boys had headed off to practice and she had pleaded homework to get Ron to let her be in the common room. He insisted on her attendance of Quidditch practice. He liked her watching, he said.
She supposed a lot of it had to do with how his childhood had been. She understood. She wished she didn't have to be the one that alleviated his worry or helped his ego. But she was his friend.
And then she felt it again. Guilt.
Overpoweringly strong, that threatened to steal her breath. She had to stop thinking, now.
She decided that a late walk before Ron returned would do the trick...
x ~ x
Hermione is back and her days are shit. Hope this was a good chapter :)
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Thank you for reading my work I am extremely happy you do :) even if its like one person....
Quick note - I know I switch between Ron and Ronald and that's intentional. When it's a direct referenceto Hermione'sthoughts it's Ronald because that's what she calls himin her head. It's to signify a sense of detachment that she feels towards him now .... Xx
