Depressed Love (SLOWLY UPDATING)

Chapter Ten: We Need to Talk..

My face immediately lights up when I see who walks in. Chase. Chase actually came to see me. I mean, I wanted to get up and hug him, but my leg was hurting so bad. I sat up and opened my arms to him. He came and hugged me tightly. Oh god he smelled so good. I kinda guessed it was his Abercrombie & Fitch cologne. I seriously wish I had his hoodie to keep so I could smell a piece of him everyday, but then I realized that he and I are just friends. I don't think he will every feel the same about me. 

"Alex, I'm glad you're okay. But, we need to talk about something."

Oh great. He's gonna say he doesn't want to be friends with me anymore. Was it because of what happened on our "date"? Wait maybe I said something that offended him. 

"Okay so the other day when you were asleep, I decided to go for a walk around town. I grabbed a coffee from Starbucks and walked around at the park. I took in all the scenery but it was something that spotted my eye. There was a red balloon stuck in the tree. And, I mean, at first I thought it was just a random balloon that some kid lost when they were going for a stroll too. But I got closer and saw a note attached to the end. Then it hit me. This was the balloon that we wrote are secrets in. In my head I just thought, well is it yours or mine."

Oh no. What if it was mine. He knows my secret. He knows that I love him. This could go really really wrong or so so right. Wait a minute. Oh god. I also put my deepest childhood secret. I should've known better than to but that secret. Damn it I'm a dumbass. 

"I opened it, and well, it wasn't my secret Alex."

I thought I was going to cry. My eyes watered a little bit but I held it in. My head fell into my hands and I just- well I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do.

'Oh god oh god oh god. Chase...I- I-"

"Alex its okay. I came here to tell you my secret. I'm in love with my best friend too. I love you Alex."

Inside, my stomach just filled with butterflies. I just, I-I. I just feel so asdfghjkl. I can't. I smiled but then it changed instantly once I realized that he knows my other secret.

"Chase this means you know that -."

"Alex I know. It's oka-"

"No Chase this isn't okay. Listen to me. My dad raped me. Okay. Get that in your head. I've been emotional wreck ever since this when I was 13. I've been cutting myself since I was 13. I've been thinking about killing myself since I was 13. Look at my wrists Chase. Look at my thighs. They are covered in scars. This is all because of my dad. Every night I think about this. Every night that passes by I think this could've been my chance to end the pain. So no it is not okay. I just can't stand it anymore."

At the point I started bawling my eyes out. I was happy that Chase loved me, but devastated that he knew my deepest darkest secret that's been affecting my for 3 years. 

Chase came over and held my arm. He bent over and kissed all the scars. Then he hugged me. 

"Alex I love you. I am here to protect you. I want to make you feel safe. Next time you think of harming yourself, call me and I will be on my way." Chase whispered in my ear. 

"Chase I love you too."

"Now, once you get out of this cast, we are going on a date. A real date. Because officially, we are now boyfriend and girlfriend. For now, I guess we are just going to have movie night dates at your house. Okay?"

"Okay." I smiled.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N omGG THE FEELS IN THIS CHAPTER MAKE ME WANT TO CRYYY I WANT A CHASE SANDERS IN MY LIFE THEY ARE SO CUTE TOGETHERR. im so lonely i want a boyfriend. okay so i saw divergent and four is like so hawwtttttt. but anyways, this chapter has been the most intense chapter in a long time. i can't. um so that's all i gotta say for now. ill just go cry in the corner because i don't have a boyfriend and im forever alone. VOTE COMMENT AND SHARE k byee see ya next weekend.