Society and Politics

Relationships (rant/why they fail)

Ok so last chapter was basically like the happy, "peace, land, and bread", holding hands as we advance toward the future part of the revolution.

This one is the molotov throwing, kulak ice picking, Nazi shooting, bourgeois purging, flag burning part that actually gets all the work done. (prove me wrong liberals, prove me wrong.)

Since last chapter was the 3 things that make relationships strong and rewarding, I'll put what I think hinders you from actually maintaining those 3 things easily (not that it is ever easy, it just helps to not have to deal with spillover from work, school, or family when you're trying to have a relationship)

1. Greed
If understanding provides the foundation for a relationship then throwing greed into the mix is like adding water to the concrete, not a bit deal in small amounts, but the more you have the less of a platform and more of a swamp you'll end up building your relationship over.

Now ignoring any arguments as to whether people are naturally selfish or altruistic (it mostly depends on what kind of environment they're in), understanding often requires effort to piece together what all the behavioral cues and conversations show about the person and you can't really learn anything about someone if you're too busy boasting about your latest achievement of complaining about how hard you have it. While it's natural for people to want to share their thoughts and feelings with others (especially significant others), you have to remember that the other person wants to do the same. If you want someone to listen to you then you'll have to be willing to listen to them. I'm sure you all have either been guilty of or seen someone else do this, and it makes everyone other than that person feel stifled, which makes them get annoyed, angry, or frustrated with you which as you can imagine is not what you want in a relationship.

Now onto how this relates to our society. We'll first off, the current Capitalist system rewards greed, and children are taught from a very young age to be greedy. You never hear a parent wanting their kid to become a sanitation worker, construction worker, public defendant, or teacher- even though they all agree that they're jobs that we need to fill, No children are encouraged to pursue careers in Law, Science, Medicine, and Technology- all the jobs with sizeable paychecks and even in school teachers often threaten kids that they'll "end up at McDonald's if they don't apply themselves". Our current culture while it claims to profess teaching tolerance, fairness, and virtue to kids end up teaching them that in order to succeed in life one must be viscous, cunning, and greedy to succeed (how often do you see celebrities or b/millionaires portrayed as generous, kind, and good natured people) kids learn from a very young age that those at the top of the pyramid didn't get there by playing nice and helping others, thus that in order to be successful like them they must do the same thing. And this bleeds into relationships as well, that is why there are so many shallow, jealous, or manipulative people in relationships, because if being a selfish SOB is how you get money and power, why shouldn't the same apply to a romantic partner? Relationships are seen as a symbol of status, why do you think people obsess over "hot chicks" or what their Bf is going to give them, or society turns love into a matter of profit and when people think of their partner as their property, it leads to manipulative and abusive relationships, it leads to them worrying about having them 'stolen", and it makes them think that their partner owes them for being in the relationship. Alternatively it makes people believe that they do owe their partner, that they are justified in being kept only for one person, and that even if it is a bad one, that any relationship is better than none (a logic which parallels wage slavery)

Greed blinds people to the needs of others and dehumanizes them as well, and that can easily turn a romantic relationship into a glorified form of slavery.
The fact that our current economic system and societal values encourage this is a telltale sign that something is wrong with it at a fundamental level.

2. Status Quo
The main tenet for conservatism and most used excuse for unwillingness to change, the reason that it kills learning is that supporting it actively discourages doing anything other than what "must" be done. Any system supporting a status quo is detrimental to learning because higher levels of education often both unnecessary for said status quo and cause people to want to look further than it, it makes them ask more questions and a conservative system simply doesn't tolerate itself being questioned.
Applied to relationships this causes the problem of traditional gender roles which while to some might sound ideal, is quickly becoming irrelevant in modern society. Most women have to work and indeed are just as qualified as men, and with the state of the economy and inflation increasing it is almost impossible to economically sustain the nuclear family, socially it is even worse. As many women will rightly point out, traditional gender roles are very sexist and they wouldn't be willing to enter a relationship with those expectations. Now most people aren't that conservative but the while the system presses the conservative idea, pop culture presses the liberal one of a couple (M/F, M/M, F/F, etc.) where both work and support each other financially and emotionally, all this does is give people another dillusion as to what a good relationship looks like. The truth is that there is no ideal relationship type for everyone, each person is unique and their relationships should be based on them and their partner's needs, preferences, etc. The idea that everyone should live a certain lifestyle or behave a certain way in a relationship (forcing men to become accepting is still forcing something, they should do it voluntarily) is almost certain to cause strife as people try to achieve unrealistic goals and constantly compare themselves to the "ideal"
I shouldn't even have to say this but, if you compare anything to perfection it'll seem like shit. It's simply unrealistic to expect anything to be perfect

3. Money

You didn't even have to be Leftist to see this one coming, Money is one of the main things that kills the passion in a relationship
Whether it be by not being able to afford things or just the stress associated with finances, money is a huge turn off in most relationships. Now the issue with money is that in many relationships it becomes a central point of conflict, especially in those where they do not earn the same amount of money (which is to say most)
Although most issues that relationships face with money are due to the system itself and the commoditizement of workers, one of the more serious ones is the usage of romance as a tool for business. Historically marriage has been used as a political tool, and as a business one to expand ones power or wealth by strategically marrying into wealthy or powerful families
Sadly this is still seen in modern times as there is a different tax rate for married people as well as several laws regarding property and married couples.
Money still is the root of all evil, the fact that it's an issue in romance as well doesn't reflect well on our society either.

Thus from these reasons we can easily deduce the reasons for many relationships failing and while some relationships are doomed right from the start, that should be determined by the people in them and not society. Honestly speaking, how often do you see relationships fail for these reason, whether they be friendly or romantic?