Blood Moon

Chapter 6 - Acceptance

Jasper's POV

Bella's acceptance of my past was soothing to my soul. I shouldn't have been surprised, she's always been accepting of us.

She brought me out of my reverie by asking, "Jasper, you have a lot of experience with newborns right? Am I acting different? I don't feel like a crazed newborn; I feel like myself."

"Like I said before, one newborn is more rational than 10 newborns who are slaves to their instincts. Plus, you were better prepared. You already knew about us, and had an idea of what to expect so that could be the reason why you are so controlled. Do you have any questions about what you are experiencing?" I asked her trying to get her to open up now that she was talking about herself.

"Not really. I'm still getting used to being able to think about so many things at once. I don't feel driven by my thirst like I was expecting. I mean, there was that one time I smelled a human when I was hunting with Edward," she looked down ashamed.

I pulled her into my arms saying, "I'm sorry, Bella. I had hoped to protect you so you wouldn't have to feel the guilt of taking a human life."

She looked up at me and said "I didn't kill anyone! I gave chase, completely driven by my instincts but I stopped when I noticed Edward behind me. I ... I growled at him. That cleared my head so I forced myself to run in the opposite direction," she said looking down again.

I was in complete shock. A day old newborn actually managed to run away with the smell of human blood in the air. I felt her shame and remorse intensify and I realized that she must have misunderstood my shock, so I pushed the same feelings of awe, affection and pride to her that she gave me after I told her my story. "Bella, why are you ashamed? You managed to regain your senses mid hunt."

"I'm a freak! I mean, I've always felt like I didn't really fit in when I was human. And I had thought I found my place when I met the Cullen's. Now it turns out I'm not good at being a vampire either," she explained hurriedly.

"You're right. You are a freak!" Bella gasped before I continued, "You'll fit right in. To the rest of the vampire world, all the Cullen's are freaks," I explained. "But, among the Cullen's, I'm afraid the title of freak falls to me. You fit in better here after only a few days, then I do after several decades." I looked down before continuing, "I was considering leaving the family for awhile." I stopped when I felt a blast of anger hit me and looked up to see Bella glaring at me.

"Jasper Hale, you put that thought out of your mind straight away. If you leave, I will hunt you down and bring you back home kicking and screaming." she yelled at me.

What she doesn't know is that the Cullen's never felt like a home to me until recently. I tried to push calm her way and it seemed to be working ... at first. Then I got another blast of anger.

"Don't use your power on me mister," she huffed.

I couldn't help it but I started laughing. Bella when she is angry is like an angry kitten. She glared at me again before turning around and taking off.

"Damn!" I cursed before I took off after her. Luckily she wasn't running as fast as she could otherwise I wouldn't have caught up to her. I tackled her from behind taking her by surprise. I rolled her onto her back and held her arms above her head, forming manacles around her wrists. "I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't mean to laugh. And I promise not to alter your emotions ... unless it's to save you from yourself." I assured her.

She seemed like she was going to argue with me but after thinking about it for a second she agreed.

She stopped struggling and I started to realize the position we were in. Her chest heaving though she didn't need to breathe; her lips slightly parted. I had a sudden urge to kiss her. She is so beautiful and enticing and she doesn't even know it. All of a sudden, the country song "She Don't Know She's Beautiful" by Sammy Kershaw popped into my mind. That song definitely describes Bella, she doesn't see herself clearly at all. I constantly feel unworthiness coming from her. Especially when Edward is around. If I didn't know better I would think Edward was abusing her.