Smile Flower ❀ Soonhoon

7 | Heaven

-7 ♡ Heaven

I smile for you every day,
I pray for you
With thoughts of you, I fall asleep,
I open my eyes as I call for you
You protect me by my side,
and you embrace me
You are my heaven

╟ ♥ ╢

If you asked Jihoon what being around Soonyoung felt like, you can guarantee that his answer would be laced with lies and denial. The boy may say that he wanted to go to heaven, considering his suicide attempt, as harsh as it may sound, but truly, he knows he's in heaven when he's with Soonyoung.

Of course, it's the same from Soonyoung himself, yet he's a lot worse at denying his own feelings, and only does it because if he's honest with himself, he's afraid. All through his life, he's been in control of his feelings and choices, so when Jihoon broke all that he knew, instead of picking up the pieces, they formed a beautiful pattern in their shards on the ground and Soonyoung left them there.

Shards of broken dreams, Soonyoung found, were not sharp and dangerous like shards of glass. When you stepped on them to reach the goal on the other side, it didn't sting or make you bleed, it actually felt like treading on the soft white clouds of heaven. After a while, the shards went away, but they always seemed to return when Jihoon was around.

It was the touch that did it, though. When Jihoon touched Soonyoung, or Soonyoung touched Jihoon, the shards came back faster than ever before. For that reason, Soonyoung resolved to be as touchy and cuddly with Jihoon as he could.

Deep down, he knew that their friendship would end. All things come to and we , whether in death or other circumstances. Hopefully, it would end, but be replaced with a romantic relationship. Yet, Soonyoung had his doubts. Jihoon never spoke about love, he never seemed to react to the return of his shards (If they existed of course) and most of all, he rarely talked about their friendship.

"Pretty," Soonyoung breathed out, watching Jihoon sleep on the couch. He looked gentle and calm, like a cat. The younger did speak about sleeping though. Sometimes, Soonyoung would see him pacing the sitting room in the early hours of the morning, exhausted yet unable to sleep because of the demons in his head. And, if he was lucky, he'd get the touch he loved so much and Jihoon would just start crying into his chest, wanting out of this horrible cycle of pain and suffering.

"Confess to him," Jeonghan said suddenly, carelessly stirring his coffee. A hoodie was flung over his shoulders, and his gaze at Soonyoung was firm. "You love him, it's clear to me that he's head over heels for you, so you'd both benefit."

"I don't think he loves me," Soonyoung replied. He couldn't remember a time when Jihoon had reacted to his affection. In truth, he couldn't remember a time when his best friend wasn't closed off and quiet about his life.

"Well you're stupid then," Jeonghan laughed, lifting up his mug to take a sip. "He's obsessed with you."

Soonyoung shook his head. There had been times when he though Jihoon did feel the same. When they acted like a couple, going on coffee dates, holding hands, the affectionate way Jihoon would stroke hair from Soonyoung's face, the pet names only they knew. But then, something would happen to shatter that illusion.

"I don't think so," Soonyoung assured, watching Jihoon move in his sleep. "He's just an affectionate person, though it's in different ways from other people."

Jeonghan scoffed. "Kwon Soonyoung, I have never seen a man so blatantly in love with you in my life. Besides, if he says no, you'll probably just become closer than you already are." He shrugged. "If that's even possible, of course."

"Whatever," Soonyoung groaned, turning back around to look at Jeonghan. "It's not the right time anyway."

"Is it ever the right time to confess to someone?" Jeonghan laughed, shaking his head as he spoke. His blonde hair was shorter now, and Jihoon had freaked out when he saw it. "Seungcheol confessed to me when-"

"When he accidentally broke your finger in his locker door," Soonyoung smiled. Jeonghan liked talking about his boyfriend, in fact, it was possibly his favorite thing to do. Apart from taking care of his son, of course.

"We've heard that story a million times," Jihoon said, looking over the back of the couch. Soonyoung froze. "What time is it?"

Jeonghan laughed at Jihoon's disheveled state, smiling at his younger friend who replied with a scowl.

"Two pm," Jeonghan giggled, lifting up his mug again. His eyes shone while he drank, and Soonyoung couldn't tell whether it was the caffeine or the fact that maybe, just maybe, Jihoon had been awake the entire time and had heard everything.

"We should talk," Soonyoung demands, reaching forwards to make his hand meet with Jihoon's. The latter accepts, a small smile stretching across his face when their palms meet gently. "Alone." He adds, gesturing to their shared study, which is just off of the kitchen.

Jihoon lets himself be lead into the room, a small blush on his face the whole time. It's too perfect, he thinks, somehow, something will go horribly wrong and everything will fall apart just like last time.

"So, I'm just going to say it," Soonyoung whispers, casting his eyes downwards. "I like you, a lot. I think I love you, to be honest."

Jihoon wasn't ready. Instead, he just nods, and steps closer to Soonyoung to press a sweet kiss to the corner of his mouth. Soonyoung swears there's a fire glowing behind the pupils of Jihoon's eyes, getting brighter and brighter every second and making heat rush through their bodies.

"You make me blush." Jihoon concludes, leaning into Soonyoung's chest. "I like it."

╟ ♥ ╢
A/N: Next chapter is the final one, and the epilogue.
Added 24/7/17: How would you feel about Chan being soonhoon's son? Just an idea.