He Told Me To Walk This Way

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

Two hours later we were in the parking lot of the arena. There was an astronomical amount of people there which was understandable considering how undeniably talented Aerosmith was.  We tried to pass everyone and finally we got in.

The crowd was going crazy with anticipation, screaming and shouting, as we all waited for Aerosmith to come onstage.

“Oh my gosh Ginger, I can’t believe were actually here!”

“I know, I know” I said. Trying to keep up any kind of conversation would have been futile because it was so loud. I don’t think Angie even understood what I said because she just nodded, smiling.

All of the sudden the lights dimmed pitch black and then a couple of multicolored spotlights streamed onto the stage. This was it. Here they come, I thought.

I saw Steven immediately. He was so gorgeous…everything about him was perfect.  I couldn’t look at anyone else. I couldn’t make myself stop looking at him all through the entire show. I watched every move he made and listened to every breath he took from the first song, Let the Music Do the Talking to the last, Darkness. I felt something very unsettling while I watched him dancing around on stage. It made me angry and I almost wanted to cry.

I felt like I still loved him.

This wasn’t like I’d imagined. I couldn’t be here just as a fan! What we had at one time could never be erased no matter how much I wanted to act like it could. This was just reopening the wounds that I had tried close throughout these past eleven years.

“Ginger…Gin, what’s wrong?”

Angela nudged my shoulder, regaining my attention.

“Oh…nothing” I lied.

“You’re crying though…”

“Am I?” I said, wiping away a single tear.

After the set list was finished, the guys went backstage and Angela and I, along with other lucky fans who’d gotten backstage passes, waited to meet and greet.

Luckily we were relatively close to the front of the line.

As we were being led backstage I saw the band pass us. More like, I saw Steven pass me. I wasn’t paying attention to anything else.

At that moment I hoped he wouldn’t recognize me. I didn’t want to set myself up for the ultimate disappointment. He turned toward me and then our eyes met. My heart pounded against my chest. He was just standing there looking at me. He started walking toward me, closer and closer, until he was only inches from me. That was when he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the line and away from Angela. I couldn’t ask questions and I couldn’t stop him from taking me. I heard Angie yell my name and a security guard stopping her from following Steven and me. He led me down a dimly lit cinderblock hallway lined with a couple of doors that I guessed were dressing rooms. My suspicions were confirmed when Steven opened of them and took me inside.

Clothes were everywhere, along with makeup and feathery, glittery things.

He sat down in a chair that matched a vanity that was in the room. He sat there for a minute, just looking down. I sort of awkwardly stood there in front of him, waiting.

Then he looked up.

And that was when I realized he was crying.  

He stood up slowly and said, “G-Ginger?”

I just nodded, watching his every move.

His hands went up and he covered his face, probably tryin to hide the fact that he was crying, like, really crying.