stopping fate

part 6: April and confessions?

I waited for him that noon. After the meet in the park, I wanted to see him more, wanted to chat with him, smile at him and maybe share his combo burgers again. But, his shadow doesn't even meet the pillars of the cafe back then. All I know is, his name is Raymond. Raymond. To keep me busy, I spent extra time for my shift, read magazines in the counter if there's no costumer, even made a double-check(and multiple checks) at the glass windows. That maybe he is out there somewhere ready to enter the proximity. Yet, he didn't arrive. Ben was totally worried that time even if he kept to himself, I keep silent taking my long strides wanting to go home as soon as possible.

Now, as much as I wanted to think about him and where is he and what is he doing and all other things, I must go to school and actually study. It's what life is all about, even if you've got a lot of problems, it all goes down to school. As if, the emotional problems doesn't affect a person's learning. 

"Llana!", Ben shouted. He is in his t-shirt--I am happy that he's not wearing the Metallica one- and jeans with his backpack slings to both arms. Yesterday was all about me thinking about Mr. Tulips and didn't accompany Ben to his biking practice.

"What's that?" I noticed I horizontal bandage over his forehead as if he had a biking accident bumping his head. Observing the cut of the bandage, it's pretty long. I reaches out a hand to examine the damage. He slightly flinched but didn't back off. I notice a blush at his white cheeks.

"Ahm, it's not that bad. I got this yesterday while practicing. I think it's healing now. No need to worry." He waves his hand erasing the worries and the hurt somehow.

"I'm sorry, Ben, I didn't go with you yesterday and.."

"It's okay, Avellana, I wouldn't even concentrate when you shouts so loud I can't even hear myself breathing." He chuckles. Of course, I am worried, I thought. Every time he launches the ramp, my heart launches also. I am not in any way into outrageous sports because I am afraid of taking a risk and falling down, and all I receive are bruises and body aches. That is why, I keep on thinking until now to give up not into something, but into someone. Someone who I know is never be seen again, or at least constantly seen.

"Avellana.." I flinch at the sound. Last time I heard my name, I was blushing.

"That's my best friend!", Ben said. He hugs me, giving my shoulder a squeeze and together we starts to go inside the hallway. 

"Can you just stick to LLana? Benny!", I call him his hated nickname. 

"Only if you remove the 'ny' in my name." I nodded. "And ah-- Llana.. can you wait for me later, I've got to tell you something." He suddenly turned serious.

"Ok, Ben." I just said.

The whole day drags me from Anatomy to Lunch to Photography class-that I don't even have any interest into. Ben is surprisingly excited about something and always smiles at me when he sees me watching him-wondering. I give back smiles but it creeps me somehow. I don't know what's he going to tell me later but her  palpable happiness tells me it should be very good. I don't want to make him sad so I prayed for the best later. 

At lunch, April is with me and Ben is busy buying some cafeteria snacks. 

"Llana, you wanna check library, I have this project about Hemingway and I want some help, please?" April asks me with those puppy eyes I have to compose myself to answer.

"Okay, Apes, but not today, let's go tomorrow. Ben is with me, I think we'll go somewhere."

"Thanks, you know, Ben is kinda happy today, you know why?" April have this sensitive radar  over her few true friends that she can sense their problems, emotions and every time when something is wrong. Or at least, to Ben. She's a shy girl and a bit secretive too. But.. we can play both her game.