That Secret (Louis Tomlinson)

Chapter seventy three

Stacey's POV

It's been two days since I saw Louis at the shopping centre and has it been a hard two days without him. I miss him I really do but harry has been there for me during my bad times of missing Louis deeply.

"Stacey!" harry called.

"Yeah" I shouted back as we were in separate rooms.

"A parcel is here for you" he said which made my jump out of bed, I was wondering what it was and eager to see what was in there.

"Well are you going to open it or just stare?" Harry said inturuping my thoughts.

I ripped the package open and inside where loads of little blue items, baby clothes and inside was a letter with my name on it. I opened it and read what it said.

Dear stace,

Now I know I'm meant to be giving you some space to think and not have me bugging you but I saw these items for our little boys and had to get them as I thought of how much you would love them you know, I hope you do because I'm not a good shopper but I tried thinking what you would like so I got these, wait have you even looked or gone straight here, to the letter?

Well I don't mind either way, at the moment Niall is at my case making sure your okay and the baby which I hope you both are. I haven't heard from you since the day at the shopping mall and ever since then that is all I have been thinking of.

I just wanted to tell you some stuff in this letter while I can, I think it's best to put it into a letter.

Well to start you know I've had a bad past of course but I haven't let you in properly for my liking so that's what I'm going to do in this letter, before I met you I was a mess, a complete, utter mess and I liked it that way then but know I think back I fucking hated it, I was in too many fights and would usally end up in hospital the next day due to blood loss or a broken arm but I would heal quickly but then do it all over again, eventually people made me stop fighting as it was taking such a bad toll on me which some of my 'friends' didn't like, instead they would get me pissed out of my brain and leave me wondering in the streets late at night to get into another fight. I eventually left them friends but stuck with Niall considering he hadn't been involved in anything.. anyway as time went on I found a few jobs, my first one being with weapons, it was a pretty cool job until it got found out so I got the sack. Then I found my old job (the drugs and illegal one) which I kept for some years earning so much money then I could handle, I still have it all, for our future stace.

I know this is such a shit and random letter but now I'm gonna tell you something really important!

The night it all happened I don't even know what did happen to be honest, I don't know what occurred that night which I'm most scared of, she said we didn't but I'm not sure if she's telling the truth. I actually cannot figure out one tiny detail of that night. but all I do know if I was sober I would never of done anything that night, I would've come back home with you and cuddled with you with kisses and everything. I just wish I stayed in with you that day and we would be probley cuddled on the couch or bed watching one of them love films you adore or eating like we usally do but I had to fuck that up didn't I. I'm such a fool it's untrue, I've never regretted anything before but I do with this because I have lost you, the best thing I've ever had in my life.

Stacey, you don't know how much I fucking love you. If we don't get back together I think I couldn't live anymore as your the one who makes it complete. I have nothing left without you and our little boy, I'm not trying to make you feel bad but I don't think I could really live with myself if we wern't together.

Just know baby, I love you so fucking much! And I know this isn't going to make you forgive me but if you can please call me baby, I need to hear your voice but only if that's okay with you, okay? so take care of yourself darling, that's one thing you have to promise!

So baby just remember I love you and I'm only a call away.

Love you with all my heart,

Louis. xx

My heart swelled with love reading his letter, he had explained so much in that letter even though he talked about some random parts in his life but that's what made it special to me.

"Soooo.." harry said

"From Lou, put everything a letter" I smiled.

"Well what did he say" he asked and I passed him the letter.

"Read it" I smiled. I knew I should forgive Louis so easily but I can't stay away from him this long, I'm so used to being with him and his the same with me.

"Well do you think he's done it" he asked.

"Done what"

"Earned your forigiveness" he smirked.

"That's one thing I'm certain of, he has harry" I whispered.

"That quick"

"Yeah, that letter said everything" I said taking the letter back.

"So your going to forgive him?" harry said with confusion.

"Yes I am"