Unconditionally

Chapter 0.36

  October 2018

|| Marabelle ||

I frowned at the doctor who stood in front of Freddie and I with a somber expression. Did I just hear right?

"W-what are you talking about?" I asked quietly.

"Miss Jaimeson, you suffered a miscarriage," She told me.

"What? No, that's impossible," I said. "I was never pregnant."

"You were," She said. "You were six weeks along."

"We...we were gonna have a baby?" Freddie asked quietly, his voice trembling.

"Like I said, I'm sorry for your loss," Dr Reynolds said.

"W-what happened?" I asked, feeling my eyes start to burn with tears.

"Your baby wasn't getting all of the nutrients it needed and we concluded that in the early hours of this morning the placenta was cut off from its air supply which in turn caused the umbilical chord to wrap around the fetus's neck," She told me.

"Oh my god," I gasped. "I did this. This is my fault..."

"Marabelle, don't say that!" Freddie said, sounding as heartbroken as I felt.

"Not, this is my fault," I said, finally allowing the tears to spill over. "I drank alcohol and coffee and I wasn't eating healthy and our baby paid the price for it."

"No, Belle. Please don't think like that," Freddie said as he pulled me into a hug and allowed me to cry into his chest. "You didn't know, baby."

"I should have figured it out, Freddie! I should know my own body by now!" I said as I continued to cry hysterically.

That's why I missed my period. That's why I've been eating the weirdest things. Mallory was right.

But how did this happen? I've been on the pill the whole time and most of the time Freddie and I use protection. So how?

"Miss Jaimeson, I know this is a lot to deal with right now but I need you to calm down. We can't have your blood pressure rising anymore," Dr Reynolds tried saying to me but I just couldn't listen.

Freddie and I created a life together and then I destroyed it before it even had a chance.

"I'm sorry," I said to Freddie through my tears. "I'm so, so sorry. I didn't mean to."

"Belle, please," He begged, "don't do this to yourself."

"Miss Jaimeson, I'm going to have to sedate you. Your blood pressure is rising at an alarming rate and I need to calm you down," Dr Reynolds said before I felt a prick in my arm.

"I'm sorry, Peaches," I murmured before my eyes felt heavy before they closed completely and an unwelcomed sleep consumed me.

A few hours later I groggily opened my eyes and focused on the unfriendly environment of a hospital room.

In the corner passed out on a chair with a blanket wrapped around him was Freddie and my heart constricted as I thought of what I had taken from him before he even had the chance to have it.

"Nugget, you're awake," I heard Mallory say quietly from beside me. I didn't even realise she was still here.

"You're here," I said through a trembling voice.

"They couldn't get me to leave," She said with a chuckle that was barley audible. "I had to know that you're okay."

"I'm not," I said before the tears started falling again.