365 days

Day 2

18/12/2010

It's Saturday. One of my favorite days of the week.

It's just a few days left until christmas.

My family is busy preparing the christmas tree and gifts for each other.

I still don't know what should I give to my parents and my sister.

I haven't mentioned my sister yet, considering I just started writing this yesterday. I have one sister, she's 3 years older than me.

That means, she's in college now. She goes to Winchester College which is 4 hours drive from my house. That's why she only comes home during holidays.

While I was busy thinking about what presents should I get for them, my mom called me and asked me if I wanted to decorate the christmas tree. I mean, I always love decorating but I'm not that good at decorating. Sucks, I know.

The truth is, I always feel like I'm not good enough. Not just at decorating, but at everything else.

I remember when I was in 5th grade, one of my teachers at school let us decorated the christmas tree, it was like a week before christmas holidays, and me being overly excited, decorated the tree just like how I always wanted it to be.

Then there was this girl, one of my classmates, pushed me out of nowhere, making me fall to the ground.

I asked her why did she do that, and she said that I was blocking her way to decorate the tree and that I made the tree looked ugly. Thinking about it now might sound so childish, but we were like 10 years old back then.

I know that I shouldn't have taken it to my heart, but even when I was a little girl, someone had made me feel like a shit.

I know that some people might say that it's not a big deal, it's just a tree, but it is kinda a big deal for me, because since then, I always thought that I'm not good enough, even when it comes to decorating, I'm just not good enough.

[A/N: hope you like this chapter. Don't forget to vote and comment. I love you.]