conversations with

twenty-five

i don't know what I like about you.
But I do knew that you make my heart go a little crazy.
I remember when our eyes meet that makes me wonder if you were looking at me.
Missing our late text and how you make me speechless become you said something sweet.
The first time when we went out, I jokingly said " Come in 30, otherwise I'll leave. "
Found me in 15 sleeping in the room.
You got me ice-cream and brought me happiness.
I remember you being awkward and so was I
asking you to shut up each time you speak.
Four days later, I look your first kiss.
Leaving you wondering who was my first.
You still think I have been in a relationship before
but little do you know
and all I could do is laugh it off
Promised you I'll tell you someday
One day when you ask me " Will you be mine ? "
I miss those days when I get all your attention
Day by day you got used to my presence,
leaving me behind, and that's alright.
I'll try to help more understanding, I promise you.
I don't want to be known as clingy
Although I thank you for giving me excitement.
But overtime you'll get bored of my attention..
Maybe its my fault for rushing things
mine for expecting
mine for being needy,
the one who needs love and attention.
I'm sorry for being ALL OF THE ABOVE
But let me know?
And yes I am thankful
No matter what happens, I guarantee you
I'll stick with you,
I promise
I won't give up on you
I hereby say,
I am thankful.

But what if you left?
What if I'm here so you could just use me?
I'm afraid of being ten times broken, already crying at 2 a.m. because I over think or maybe just facing facts.
I remember us sharing songs at 3 a.m. and how many said it's impossible to get you out of that shell. I did it.
But I'm afraid my effort would go to waste. I'm scared me effort of caring for you will go down the drain.
All my amounts when my heart was racing.
But now, it's all gone.

gone.