Under the Sunlight

Chapter 12

It was a couple of weeks after Max's tantrum. Max was happy enough seeing Cassandra but he sometimes looked a little confused when he went off alone with her every time. He'd been used to the three of them spending time together. So one afternoon after Cassandra had dropped Max off at the door, with a hug for Max and barely a look at his father, Max finally asked.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah, cowboy?"

"Are you and Andra not friends no more?"

Jacob sighed. He'd been waiting for the question. And he knew he couldn't lie to his son any more. He sat down on the sofa and pulled the boy onto his lap.

"Cassandra and I . . . ." This was like explaining the divorce all over again. Though Max had been so little then. "We . . . ." He bit his lip, his son's confused and concerned eyes staring at him. "It's hard to explain because it's a grown up thing. But I guess you can say we aren't friends anymore."

Max whimpered. "I know, buddy. Believe me, we both are sad about it. But it's nothing to do with you. Both of us love you, okay? She's still your friend and I want her to be. But it's gonna be a lot like me and your mama, okay? You spend time with her and I won't be able to come along. It'll be okay, though, alright?" He kissed his son's cheek and hoped another tantrum wasn't going to start.

But instead of anger, Max looked sad. And Jacob was pretty sure he looked sad too because the next thing out of Max's mouth was, "you miss her, Daddy?"

"Yeah, I do. But it is what it is, okay?"

Max's lip quivered but he just threw his arms around his father's neck and hugged him. And Jacob hugged back, taking the comfort. Maybe Max could tell how much he missed Cassandra. But he didn't need to know it was like a physical ache and sometimes it was hard not to chase her down the hallway and pin her against a wall and kiss her senseless before dropping to his knees and begging for her forgiveness.

"She's sad too, Daddy," Max whispered. "But I'll just have to hug her more then, huh?"

"Yeah," Jacob said. "It always worked before. Now come on, tell me about what you did today."

He listened to Max's animated account of what he and Cassandra did while trying and probably failing to not miss her.

He really wished Baird was around. He could use someone to talk to. Ezekiel would not do. Jenkins, he could tell, did not wish to discuss his personal life. Flynn was well Flynn. But Baird, he could count on her. He missed her too.

--

A week later, he stumbled through the Back Door to find Baird seated at her desk, reading a file.

"Well, ain't you a sight for sore eyes," he grinned at her. "Where's Flynn?"

"I finally got him to come home and rest. Course I say rest and he decides to sleep for a week." She rolled her eyes, "I got antsy and decided to come in and check on you. But Jenkins said you were all on separate cases?"

"Yeah, it just worked out that way this week," Stone told a bit of a fib, he didn't want Baird worried about them when he really needed to talk to her.

She nodded, they did all have different clippings books for a reason. "So what's your case?"

"Oh," he rummaged through his bag, pulling out a document. "All wrapped up actually. Just need to give this to Jenkins. Hey, would you be up for a cup of coffee? I kinda need an ear. If you'll let me go get this secured and take a shower."

She smiled kindly. "Parenting again?"

"Among other things."

"Yeah, sure, I've got nowhere to be."