Feeling Like Nothing (Sasunaru Fanfic)

Part 1- Feelings

  Hello welcome to this Sasunaru fanfic! This is literally my first fanfiction, so sorry if it's bad, but I'll try to make it good. This also takes place after The Land of Waves battle (against Zabuza and Haku). *Disclaimer I do NOT own any characters, places, pictures, or storyline related to Naruto.* Enjoy!

Naruto's pov-

    I looked out of the window of my home. The sky melting with shades of blue, pink, and orange. I watched the sunset, trying to put together my thoughts and hopefully understand what I was feeling, but somehow I couldn't. My feelings for Sakura I believed were genuine, and yet here I am questioning them. There's no doubt in my mind that she is beautiful, of course I love her, but maybe I only love her for her looks. Or maybe I don't really love her and it's only just a silly crush.

    Even when I do try to ask her out or something, her mind runs to Sasuke instead of me. Hmm...Sasuke. Lately, it has been quite hard to think about him. If I thought my feelings towards Sakura are hard to figure out then my feelings towards Sasuke are ten times worse. There are many times where I definitely hated him, but that hate seemed to form more into jealousy, and the jealousy into something...well something...different?

I know that  I don't like when he saves me because I want to be the one who saves him. I mean how can I become Hokage when I can't even save myself. But yet I feel so conflicted, knowing that I don't want to be saved by him, but when he does save me I can't help but be a tiny bit relieved. And I hate to say it, but when he's around, somehow, for some reason I feel a sense of security, a sense of comfort, knowing that he is there to protect me if I really need it.

And sometimes I feel so alone. One of the worst feelings for me. Knowing everyone hates you can sometimes really get to you, and I try my hardest not to cry because it won't solve a thing, but that feeling deep inside me, feels like it might always have a place there. But I will change it, I have to change it. I want to become strong, very strong, stronger than Sasuke, and even stronger than the current Hokage because I want people to accept me, to care about me, to understand me, and mostly to believe in what I can do and what I can become. Maybe the Demon Nine-Tailed Fox is inside me, but that doesn't mean I am it. I don't want to be the monster they think I am.

So no matter what I'm going to make everyone, even Sasuke, see the real me, the hero me.

I pushed the deep thoughts back into the depths of my mind, and got up, heading towards my bed. Tomorrow was a new day, and probably a boring one, judging by hearing earlier that Kakashi accepted another D-Rank mission. I closed my eyes and soon enough I slipped away into a dream filled with instant ramen. Yum.

*Time Skip to the morning*

I woke up to my stomach aching with hunger. Ramen dreams always get to me. I sighed and got off my bed and went to the kitchen to get breakfast not bothering to check the time. I quickly ate because I was starving and I then lazily dragged my feet to go get dressed. I looked at my clock. My eyes widened and I screamed.

"I'm going to be late!"

We were going to meet at the start of the woods at exactly 9 o'clock. My clock read 9:36. I ran out the door after getting dressed and hurried to the meeting place. And no doubt Sasuke and Sakura stood there waiting.

Sasuke with his cold and distant glare as always and Sakura looked angrily at me, probably about to yell at me for being late.

"Where were you?! You know the meeting time was at 9 right!," Sakura yelled.

Knew it. She did yell at me.

"I'm sorry! I slept in, besides it doesn't matter because Kakashi is always late and he's not here now so it's fine.," I yelled back.

She just gave me a glare and resumed standing angrily. Sasuke still stood with the same look. Wow...distant as always. Isn't there a soul in the world that can break his facade? We all waited for Kakashi, of course he didn't show up till 11.

"YOU'RE LATE!,"Sakura and I yell at the same time.

"Oh really, I didn't realize, I was too busy with reading 'Make Out Paradise'," Kakashi replied with a calm expression. I made sure to glare daggers at him. However, we decided to ignore our problems with each other and peacefully, Sasuke, Sakura, and I, followed Kakashi.

"What is this D-Rank mission anyways?," Sasuke asked Kakashi. I was also curious of this, focusing my attention on their conversation.

"We're painting a fence.," Kakashi said. We all groaned at hearing that.

"Don't worry, it will be over faster than you think.," Kakashi said at hearing us all groan.

We got to the woman's house and told her that we were here to paint her fence like she had asked in the request. We all went to her backyard, the fence around it. We started on the painting. I dipped my paintbrush into the paint and made a white streak on the fence. I looked over at Sasuke, my thoughts of last night resurfacing.

'How do I feel about you, Sasuke!?," I mentally yelled at myself.

I looked at the fence shocked.

"Could it be....love?" No way! I mean...Sasuke. I guess he is good-looking, and he's good at a lot of things. Oh no! What am I saying! He's my rival, not someone I should feel that way about.

"Could what be love?," Someone said behind me. I let out a girly shriek...I mean I let out a manly shriek and dropped my paintbrush. I had accidentally said that out loud! I looked behind me to see Sasuke with a confused look on his face.

"Uhh...what?," I asked, trying to think of something to make up because I am definitely not saying that I was saying that I could love him. I shivered. Oh Naruto, why do you think these things?

"You are an idiot, you just said 'Could it be love?'," Sasuke exclaimed.

"Uhh..." Shoot what do I say!

"Well you see..." I could say I was thinking of a love between two other people, but that would just make him ask questions I couldn't answer and then that would raise his suspicion of me hiding something.

So I blurted out something random.

"I was...uh...thinking of umm...a word to a song..yea..and the word was love.," I said nervously. He sighed.

"You really are an idiot, it took you that long to answer me. Sometimes I wonder how your brain works or even if you have a brain at all. Anyways, you got me sidetracked, I wanted to get a bigger paintbrush. This one's so small, I can't get any painting done.," Sasuke reached for the case of paintbrushes beside me, grabbing a bigger paintbrush than the one he had. He walked back over to his spot and continued painting, not looking back at me at all.

  That was close. I let out a sigh and let my head fall to the fence. Right away I took my head off it, realizing I just painted that part. I wiped my head with my hand and looked at it to see white paint. Maybe Sasuke was right, sometimes I am an idiot and to that I smiled a little, thinking of other times I've been an idiot around him, which seemed like every time I was around him. Then a shock of worry and anxiousness ran through me as I thought of one thing.

'Sasuke, maybe I do...love you..'

That was the first part, I'm sorry if it was bad or boring, but I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading!