A Hint of Color (boyxboy)

Chapter 15

Jude and I walk home together after school. I have no idea how I'll tell him what happened, but I want to. He'll keep on asking about it, worrying like Taylor does, but I truly do need someone right now. A friend.

"Ross, do you want to come over?" he asks as we walk.

"Sure."

Jude's apartment is quiet when we get there. I guess his dad is at work.

"Do you want anything to eat?" he asks.

"No thanks. I'm not really hungry."

We sit on the couch and he watches me, waiting.

"I'm sorry I made you worry," I say, sinking back into the cushions.

"What happened?"

Do I really want to tell him? What if he gets scared, or upset? Jude will definitely get upset. He knows there are people who mess with me, and he knows Taylor is mad about something. I sigh and then hesitantly lift the side of my shirt to show the area where a large bruise has formed.

He looks at me in alarm, his round, brown eyes fearful. The look on his face makes me wonder if I should've kept it hidden. I drop the fabric of my shirt. "Yeah, I got punched. Not gonna make up another excuse," I say, shrugging.

"When did that happen?" he asks.

"Today. Taylor doesn't know about it though." I point to the bandaid on my cheek. "He yelled at me because of this."

"Because you tripped and fell at the party?" Jude shakes his head. "That was a lie, wasn't it? Why would he yell at you though?"

"Because I shouldn't have put myself in that situation," I tell him. I sigh, remembering how he begged me not to go into Jake's house. "You didn't want me going into that party, and I probably should've listened to you." His expression makes me feel guilty. "It's just a little cut though..."

His eyes start to narrow and he suddenly looks angry. "It's not just a little cut. You got hit today, too. Who did it?" he asks me, his voice shaking. "Who hit you?" Jude touches my arm.

"It doesn't matter." I'd rather he just let it go.

"Yes, it does!"

I sigh. Seems like he's not going to give up. "Jake," I admit. "You know, Clara's brother."

Jude stares at me for a moment and then stands up. He looks away, and I can tell he's starting to breathe more quickly.

"Jude..." My eyes widen as I realize he's starting to panic, and I stand up. "Hey, calm down. I'm okay."

"You're not!" he snaps. "None of this is okay!" He takes a deep breath and I try to reach out towards him, but he moves away and walks quickly past me.

I follow him to his room, where he sits on his bed and covers his eyes.

I carefully sit down next to him, unsure of what to do. I knew he'd be upset that I got hurt, but I never expected him to freak out about it like this. "Hey, come here." I pull him towards me with one arm and he eventually leans against me. He's still covering his eyes. "Are you crying?" I ask.

He shakes his head, but I continue to hold him so he calms down. A minute later looks up at me. "This is my fault."

I shake my head quickly. "Absolutely not. Why would you think that?"

He doesn't answer me. I don't understand why he'd say something like that. A few tears slip from his eyes and my heart breaks.

I reach towards his cheek and brush them away with my fingertips.

"Sorry," he says.

"It's okay," I assure him. "I'm just surprised you cried about this."

"Well, I'm upset that you got hurt."

My heart starts pounding for some reason. Taylor gets mad at me when I get hurt. He gets upset and scolds me. Jude, however, cried. Somehow, it makes my heart ache. How could someone cry over me getting hurt? It's my own fault that I get into these messes. How could he cry? I just don't get it. Jude hasn't even known me very long. Why would he care so much? Why isn't he scared of all my drama?

I realize we've been staring at each other for a while and his cheeks turn red. Suddenly, he moves away from me and stands.

"Are you okay now?" I ask.

He nods and sighs, turning around.

I'm glad he's calm now, even though he seems a little embarrassed. I still can't believe he got so upset about it, but it makes me smile because I know he cares about me. He really does. "Thanks for caring so much," I say, and he glances at me.

"Of course." Jude bites his lip and starts to leave the room, so I follow him back into the living room. "Shouldn't you see a doctor?" he asks me.

"It's not that bad. Nothing is broken."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Don't worry, I'd go if I needed to."

Jude sighs again and pulls out his phone to text someone. "Can you stay for dinner?" he asks.

"Probably." I smile.

"What do you like?"

"Anything, really."

"That doesn't help," he says, finally smiling back at me. He pulls open the curtains and squints as sunlight floods the room.

His blue hair seems to glow in the light, and I walk over to him. "That blue is so nice in the sun," I tell him, running my hand over his hair without thinking. It's beautiful. "Oh, sorry." I chuckle and lower my hand.

"It's fine," says Jude, turning slightly and meeting my eyes. His eyes are so round and innocent, the color of milk chocolate, and they always look at me like I'm worth something. No one looks at me like that.

I'd rather be with someone like Jude than anyone else. Someone kind and gentle who truly cares about me. I lean forward but stop myself as I return to my senses. "Sorry," I say, moving away. What was I even doing? Jude's my friend, not someone who I can just make a move on.

"It's okay," he says, but his voice shakes and that makes me feel worse. He sits down on the arm of the couch and clasps his hands together. "Really."

I sigh. Why would I do that? The room is silent for a moment. "I made you uncomfortable."

He looks up and smiles. "You didn't. I'm always like this, remember?"

I'm not convinced. He still seems nervous. "I wasn't trying to, like, come onto you... I just..." I start to panic. The last thing I want to do is ruin this friendship. "You know, you're great.. and we're friends... and I... I don't know..." Jude stares at me and I have no idea what I'm saying.

He takes a deep breath. "So why did you... Uh..."

I look away and feel my cheeks burning. "Don't worry about it."

"That's not an answer."

I cross my arms and look at him again. "I'm sorry, it won't happen again." Feeling awkward, retrieve my jacket from the cushion next to him.

"Are you leaving?" he asks hesitantly.

I smile softly, trying to lighten the mood, and I shrug. "I think I should get started on my homework."

"Okay." He follows me to the door. "Be careful."

I smile again. He still seems worried, but I think things will be okay between us. At least, I hope they will be.

"See you tomorrow."