A Hint of Color (boyxboy)

Chapter 16

A few days later, I hear a knock on the door and pause the movie I'm watching.

When I answer the door, I immediately frown. "Uh, Jake?"

He flips his brown hair casually. "Can I come in?"

"I don't feel like talking to you."

"Come on, Ross. Let me apologize."

I roll my eyes. "Okay, apologize."

Jake sighs and crosses his arms. "Yeah, so... I'm sorry I hurt you. I didn't mean to hit you so hard, I just had to stop Will from thinking--"

"You didn't have to hit me at all," I say, opening the door wider and letting him inside. "Except maybe at your party when I was drunk and being stupid. That was my fault. But at school? Why would you think that hitting me like that is okay?"

Coming inside, Jake frowns at me. "Don't be like that. I didn't have a choice."

"Yeah, you did. You could've just let his comment go or made a joke... if you were that scared of Will getting suspicious. You know he was just messing with you, right?"

He glares at me for a moment, and then his expression softens. "You're right... I'm sorry. I said I wouldn't treat you like that anymore, didn't I?"

"Yeah, Jake." I run my hand through my hair and sigh. "What are we even doing? Do you want something to happen between us or not?"

"Yes." His gaze is intense.

I chew my lip and think. I think of how Jude freaked out after Jake hurt me. I think of Taylor and the girls judging me for wanting him despite all our past drama.

But this is my business. This is between me and Jake. They don't know how things really are between us, they just see their perspective.

I can't feel guilty if they don't approve. This is my decision.

"You want it, too," he says, as if reading my mind. "Why don't we just do it?" Jake steps towards me and I breathe in.

"I don't know. You're just using me," I mutter.

Jake rolls his eyes. "You're using me, too."

I frown, but he's right. It's not like I actually have any feelings for him. He's just attractive and... to be honest, gives me an adrenaline rush. Gives me what I crave and can't get anywhere else.

"Just don't be a jerk at school anymore, okay? And tell Will to lay off." That's the only way this'll work.

He sighs, but nods. "Fine, fine." He slowly winds an arm around my waist. "Let's just do this. After graduation, we'll go our separate ways... and you can do whatever. Let's just have some fun until then and enjoy our youth."

I chuckle lightly and lean in towards him. I can't resist this anymore. "You're so complicated, Jake."

"We're two of a kind, Ross." He kisses me softly and pulls me closer. We sink back onto the couch, open-mouthed and wild.

Gasping for breath after a minute, I lean my head away. "Jake, Jake... We need to go upstairs."

Once in my bedroom, he pushes me gently onto the bed and unzips his jeans. Suddenly, everything is just like two summers ago... and it's obvious that Jake has felt hungry for it ever since.

-----

A few days later, I run into Taylor while walking in town.

"Hey," he says, stopping as he reaches me.

"Hey." I smile even though I'm still annoyed at him. The truth is, he'll never be able to stop me from seeing Jake, especially now. But eventually whatever I'm doing with Jake will end, while I'll always have Taylor. "I don't want to fight anymore."

He smirks. "Me neither, but I still think you're being reckless."

I roll my eyes. "Let's not talk about it anymore, okay?"

"Alright... We're all just worried about you."

"I know." I'm sure there's a lot more that he wants to say, but I don't want to get into it again. "Everything's fine. I'll see you at school."

Taylor nods and we part ways.

The last thing he needs is to know is what my relationship with Jake is again... not that this kind of "relationship" is definable.

I don't know how I feel about it. I mean... it's casual. It's fun. It's an adrenaline rush, but I know it's probably not the best idea.

I'm cool with it as long as he doesn't start being an ass at school again.

It'll be fine as long as I hide it from Taylor. It would be great if I could keep it from Jude, too. He'd never look at me the same way if he knew.

I sigh to myself as I walk. Maybe if he knew I had someone else, he wouldn't feel weird about me almost kissing him. He hasn't said anything about that, though.

I decide to bring it up one day anyway, while we walk home on a Monday afternoon.

"I'm glad things haven't changed between us," I say carefully.

He nods.

"You're not uncomfortable, right?"

"Of course not."

"Good." I laugh to lighten the mood. "I guess I was just caught in the moment. I mean, you are straight, right?"

"Yeah."

For some reason, I feel disappointed. The feeling catches me off guard. It's not like Jude would actually want someone like me anyway, not as more than a friend. I force a chuckle. "Of course." I continue to smile and change the subject. "I was thinking we could stop at the diner, if you want. I'm craving some spicy fries."

My phone buzzes a few times as we walk, but I ignore it. Once we're seated at the diner and order some fries, I realize that my mother is the one who's been calling me. "Sorry, it's my mom. I have to take this."

Jude watches me as I get up and leave the diner.

I call her back because if I don't she'll just keep calling.

"It's about time," she says when she answers, sounding frustrated. "Why do you always ignore my calls?"

"I was busy. I'm out to eat. What do you need?"

She sighs. "My boyfriend is coming over for dinner next week."

"Okay?"

"Make sure you're home on Wednesday night, alright? He wants to get to know you better."

I frown to myself. "Uh... seriously?"

"Yes, Ross. Don't bother protesting. Now, I have to go. Don't be home late." She hangs up before I can say anything else.

I roll my eyes and head back into the diner, annoyed, but I still smile when I see Jude's face light up at my return.

———
Author's note: Sometimes I just want to smack Ross for being like this lol. I hope my writing gets across his complex feelings about the whole situation. It's hard for me to tell sometimes if I'm explaining it the right way. Thanks for reading!