Living In Fear

Chapter 2

Imad stood outside the room as his mum checked over my head. She wiped away all the blood and gave me some painkillers as she took a closer look. "You got beautiful hair, Hasna. There is a bump on your head and I would like it if you come here in two days to just let me check over your head. What happened to you was cruel and should never happn again. Have you told your head about this?" 

"He kicked me out. We talked for two whole hours about how I was treated and then he said he wanted the locker key back." 

"Immy dropped out because of the same reason aswell. People were just so judgemental." 

"Hasna, your phone is ringing," Imad called from behind the door. "It's your mum. She said she wants to talk to you." Imad's mum open the door just enough for her hand to fit through to get my phone. As soon as I put the phone to my ear I heard the commotion in the back. 

"Amma?" 

"Are you okay, Hasna? I've been worried sick, you were meant to call me after your lesson. I called and Imad told me what happened. I told you to go to your head about this!" 

"I did, Amma. He kicked me out and there is no way I can find anothr unniversity to attend because it's so close to the exams. I'm sorry I let you down, Amma. This was meant to get me a job and everything! Now the deal with the company is gonna be off because I can't sit the papers to pass them!" 

"Look, I'm not dissappointed in you! You're my daughter and I'm proud of you. We don't need another job. Your dad earns more than enough. Anyways, now you can think about getting married again and finally start a family." 

"Amma, can I talk about this later? I need to do a few things before I come home, is that okay?" 

"Be home by eight, max." I frowned as I put the phone down on the table. Imad's mum looked at me and said, "Married again?" 

I ignored her and started to do my hijab. Once I put the last pin through the scarf I looked over at her and sadly smiled. "Aunty, it isn't what you think. I...My mum got me married at fifteen and me and him got divorced after a year because I wouldn't have...you know!" 

"Fifteen?" 

"She's very cultural. Now she's saying that maybe I should focus on having children." 

We slowly walked out and Imad popped his head out from the another room. "You going?" 

"Yes. Thank you for today. And Aunty, thank you for checking me over." 

"Hasna, wanna stay for lunch? You'll feel better and maybe the headache will go." 

"Aunty, I don't want to trouble you." 

"Boiling pasta is not so hard. It's Imad's father's turn to cook today." 

"Aunty-" 

"Stay. Please?" I nodded my head and she smiled. She pushed me into the sitting room and took my bag off me. "I'll put this at the front." 

Imad nervously looked around and then cleared his throat several times. "Ask me the question." 

"What? Huh...Urm, were you actually married?" 

"Once." 

"How old are you?" 

"Twenty-one." Imad's eyes widened. I laughed at him and then looked around the room. It felt...homey. 

"I'm twenty-three and haven't even left the country," he muttered. 

"You act like a kid. You got so happy when I told you, you could drive. Not that you gave me much choice." 

"I think my examiner was scared of me. He knew I was a Muslim and whenever I drove, he would always push himself against the door and whenver  I even moved my arm for the park thing, he would always start screaming. I don't think he wanted me wih him anymore." 

"Your mum and dad won't let you get a car?" 

"According to them, I am not that good. What did you think?" 

"You could have crashed my car and I wouldn't have noticed. I was busy thinking about something. Is it haram to step into a guy's house and then stay for lunch?" 

"Is that what you're worried about?" I shook my head and sat down on the sofa that was furthest away from him. "Do you have a child?" 

"No. We got divorced because of that." 

"You were fifteen!" 

"You were so listening to our conversation! How could you?!" 

"Hasna, I'm really sorry. I was just gonna call you guys to come and eat and I just heard. I didn't mean to." 

"And you answered my phone..." 

"Sorry...?" He reached into his pocket and took out my lisence. "You dropped it again." He carefully handed it over to me. Imad's mum walked back into the room and pulled me to the kitchen. She pushed me down onto the chair and put a plate of pasta in front of me. "Ommy, I'm hungry." 

"You and your dad are going into the sitting room. Go!" 

Imad's mum sat opposite me and started to eat. "I'm sorry I had to seperate your family like this...It looks like you all eat together and I just sent you guys apart." 

"It's okay, Hasna. You just need to come back into a day or two to let me check your head over. What course were you taking?"

"I was doing medical and some history on the side."

"If you want, I can get you a job at a clinic or at the hospital I'm working in."

"Aunty, I have troubled you enough and I thank you for your kindness but if I find a job, then I want to do it my own way. If you get me a job then I'm going to be taking a place who might really need the job." We ate the rest of the meal in silence. When she got up I spoke again. "Aunty, I hope I haven't offended you." 

"No, no. You haven't, Hasna. You are a very kind woman." I smiled at her and then began to wash my plate. "Hasna, let me do it, you're a guest." I shook my head and smiled again. 

"No, Aunty, let me. Let me do something back for your help." 

"Ommy, you done?!" Imad called from the other room. Aunty rolled her eyes and ignored him. "Ommy!" 

"Immy, we're finished!" Imad came in a few seconds later. Or maybe it was his dad. I was facing the garden and doing the dishes. "Jaan, what is it?" It was his father. 

"No, nothing. Have you seen the tape, I feel like shutting Immy up. That guy is always talking about something. I spent the whole meal listening to why does a hand have to have five fingers or how a whale may look inside and if you get trapped, can you come out from the top hole." I smiled and then carried on washing up. I dried my hand on the towel and Imad came in with my phone. 

"Imad! Again?!" 

"No...The azaan went off and it's magrib time now..." 

"Oh, sorry. Aunty, is it okay if I pray before I leave?" 

"Of course. Let me show you to the bathroom." After I prayed, I waited for Aunty finish so I can stand up. "You need to come back. I keep saying it but you need to remember." 

"I will, Aunty." I walked downstairs and saw Imad holding my phone, again. "Imad!" 

"It was ringing! Don't Imad me!" I frowned when he shoved me the phone and marched up the stairs. After saying goodbye to Aunty, I walked out the house, leaving Aunty my number. As I drove home, I thought about that everything that happened today. These things happened to me everyday and it was so common that I expet being thrown to the floor. Why couldn't people just understand that just because one person does something bad, it doesn't mean the whole religion is bad? What if I called them rapist or murderers? They wouldn't like that. Why couldn't they just understand?