Bloom (Malec)

Love is All In

It's getting late by the time we head home. It's apparent straight away that neither of us wants to go home, that we feel like foreigners, like we aren't welcome, or don't belong. But we have no other choice.

The sky's begun to darken and the headlights are imperative to making our way back down the rough road to the city.

Magnus' hand in mine feels like home in so many ways that it hurts a little bit. In such a short time, in barely a month, he's managed to change my life, to change me in ways I never imagined.

And maybe he made my life more difficult, maybe he caused some hiccups in my rather regular life, but he made it worth living. And I don't think there is any way to repay him for that.

I notice he slows down as we head toward my house, as if he's prolonging the inevitable, as if he's trying to stretch time for us to be together.

All the lights are off, and I know there will be hell to pay tomorrow when I see my parents, but right now, none of that matters.

"Why don't you come inside?" I offer softly over the quiet hum of the engine. Magnus shoots me a quick glance before looking out the windshield again. His warm amber eyes look perplexed, but I force myself to stay calm.

"You mother would have both of our heads, Alexander," he reasons, pulling into the curb out front and cutting the engine. The silence and darkness engulf us, but it's anything but uncomfortable. Magnus could make the middle of a haunted house feel like heaven just by being there.

"We'll sneak in. Jace always used to, there's a trellis that leads right up to the window in the upstairs hallway. He used to sneak in and out all the time, sometimes still does. We can sneak in that way." I explain, unbuckling my seatbelt and glancing at him. His normally perfect hair has begun to fall into his eyes, and his eyeliner is slightly smudged, signs of a hard emotional day for him, something I wish to wash away.

"Are you sure? If we get caught-"

"It'll be worth it. Come on," I slide out of the car, closing the door carefully so it doesn't make a loud bang. Magnus does the same before I lead him around the back, over the carefully worn footpath to the backyard. We quietly make our way to the trellis and I look over it. It's covered with a thin layer of vines and foliage, just enough to make it look pleasingly old, something my mother strangely strives for. I never understood it. I grin brightly at Magnus and press my lips to his cheek quickly before hooking my hands into the open spaces.

Slowly, I pull myself up, slotting my feet into the empty holes and carefully reaching toward the window. When I feel steady, I quietly pull it open, glancing into the dark shrouded hallway before beginning to lift myself in. Once my feet are planted, I lean back out to watch Magnus as he ascends.

He makes it look easy, graceful even, as he always does. He could be tripping over his own feet and it'd still look like he choreographed it that way. It's just in the way he carries himself.

I take his hands and help him through the pane, listening to the barely audible thump his feet make on the floor. I quietly shut the window and guide him through the black hallway to my bedroom.

Once we're safely inside, I slide my shoes off and smile at him.

"Our bedrooms are soundproof, something about a phase Jace and I went through when we wanted to learn to play instruments when we were younger. About a week into Jace owning a drum set and our parents soundproofed all of our rooms," Magnus chuckles sweetly and pushes his hair up, smiling beautifully at me. I can't help but smile back as I shrug my coat off and make a move to hang it up.

Magnus' hand on my wrist stops me.

"Don't," he commands softly. I furrow my brows until he nods at the coat in my hand. "This room looks like no one lives here, you know? Here," he takes my coat from where it's folded over my arm and carelessly tosses it over the back of my desk chair.

It's such a small thing, you know? So simple, a jacket left out, but it's the point that gets me. It's the smallest form of rebellion, and we both know it, but it's a tiny step, a tiny victory that I celebrate with a tiny smile. Magnus shirks his own jacket and leaves it on the seat of the chair, untying his black boots and leaving them by the doorway.

"Do you want to shower?" I ask him, earning a grateful nod in return. I show him the bathroom and leave him with a pair of my joggers and a towel. I shower myself, in the bathroom across the hall, thankfully still out of earshot from my parents, and when I'm clad in grey joggers and damp hair, I make my way back to my room.

Magnus exits the bathroom in my joggers that hang dangerously low on him, his normally up-styled hair hanging down on his forehead, damp, glitter free, and messy. His eyes are clear and open, free of all makeup, and he has a soft, natural look to him. He looks handsome, yet vulnerable. It's a side of Magnus you'd never expect to look at him.

He greets me with a warm smile that I've coined as my own, one I never see him give to anyone else, and it makes my heart pound a little bit harder.

"Your father," I begin gently as I pad over to my bed. Magnus hums, acknowledging that I spoke, as he follows me. "He really doesn't like you dating me, does he?" I ask, knowing it's a sensitive topic, yet wanting to know more, wanting to talk to Magnus while he's in this soft, pliable state. He sinks next to me on the bed, cross-legged, and folds his hand in his lap.

"You could say that, I guess. Like I said, he wishes I could just fall in love with a girl and that would be that. Make him proud of biological grandchildren and a white picket fence, but it's just not me, you know?" I nod in understanding but don't speak, afraid to interrupt when he's only now opening up to me.

"I just can't ever see myself falling in love with anyone else when I'm already falling in love with you."

I swear, in this moment, everything stops. Time doesn't exist, my sleeping family and my screwed up relationship with my parents don't matter, Magnus' father, the impending end of summer, the fear of losing what we have, none of it can touch me. I'm invincible because, in one sentence, Magnus has fixed everything.

The world could end right now, and I'd be at peace because he loves me.

And nothing else could ever come close to touching that.

It's silent for a moment while I wrap my head around that, the words ricocheting in my mind, filling my chest with this sudden rush of warmth, making my heart bloom like wildflowers. Despite everything that stands in our way, I feel like we can fight through it all now.

"Alexander?" He asks after I've been quiet a moment too long. His brows are knit together worriedly over his perfect eyes when I look at him. My hand reaches out to brush my fingertips along his cheekbone and I can't fight the smile, I don't want to.

"I love you, Magnus, I love you too."

The words feel like a prayer coming from my lips. They leave them tingling and warm, and I feel serene like finally, everything is alright. His answering smile is enough to make my heart thunder so loud I fear he can hear it, but I don't care.

When his lips meet mine, it's gentle. There's no rushing, time doesn't exist for us right now. We move in languid softness, lips barely pressing against each other, but it's absolutely perfect.

We pull away too soon, his eyes warm, like liquid honey as he smiles crookedly at me and takes my hand, tugging me into bed. He turns the lamp out and I'm suddenly wrapped up in his arms, breathing in his floral scent that has become a reminder of home to me, because right here, in his arms, is where I find my forever.

And I can't imagine the world now where we aren't together, I don't want to. Magnus doesn't know just how much he has me. Because now more than ever, I'm all in.