As much as I'd love to go on and on about how I feel, I must tell the secret. I have been living in fear too long! The darkness may as well consume me know! This is in no way an easy secret to explain... just bare with me. Here goes nothing. I had never seen such gruesome things in my life but had discovered a new passion. I had seen this lustful action occur. But now that I'm trying to be truthful I might as well admit. I hadn't seen the lustful action, I had done the lustful action. Such sin dripped from my blood but in my mind I had not cared. I wanted to feel this sensation and not just see it in films. I had fallen in lust not love. This tiresome act that many are comfortable admitting felt wrong afterward. I had thought it was nothing that all the people my age had done so. Then why was I feeling as though I had broken my purity. Was it was I was taught, what I knew was wrong but did anyway. I assume I must be going to hell now. How did my life turn so sideways? I never thought that this action would continue after a day. It indeed became a career of mine. I never had thought to tell anyone! I was so ashamed! I thought I would be ridiculed! I had to make money to live off of and yet it would cost me eternity in hell. How could surviving mean doing something so, so, so unclean! I had thought about my life as a whole and seen that more and more people had become distant from me. Had my secret come out!? This burning fantasy that made my every part feel right but wrong! Who could have told? Was it the one I trusted? I looked beyond what I saw and knew someone had known my awful secret!
