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WHEN WILL I TELL BAZZ NO

I felt asleep. Like I wasn't in reality like i I was still in a dream. I was in booty shorts with a crop top sand converse. Then BAZZ said baby you wanna go out. I said sure becuase he was my boyfriend and thats what we do. I had 3 hours to get ready so Alex helped me get ready. He was weirdly good at hair and picking out the perfect outfit. Alex  picked out a blue dress  and blue cons. For the hair he did  a braided crown with a bun on the top. Bazz asked if 7 was a good time I said yes even though I was filming my newest video. At the restraunt Bazz asked me to pay so I'd did. Then he got down in his knees and said lauren will you marry me. Alex was a waiter and walked bye and stoped. " bazz  i love you I truly do but i think I love Alex and all of this is really hard. As much as I love and as much as i care im willing to say no and instead say goodbye bazz". I felt really guilty but then said " ALEX will you go out with me." YES LAUREN YES." BAZZ screamed  " ALEX I'M GONNA KILL YOU LIKE NO TOMMAROW." Alex and i ignored that and went along on a date. I told Alex tjat i dont want anybody to know what happend happens and to know i was dating after a breakup. No vloging,no words, no social media.