Perfection|| BTS fanfic

Chapter 5|| Forbidden Love

WARNING: this chapter (and the following two) contains mention of homosexual Love ( just romantic) if you have a problem with this then please skip to chapter 8. and don't comment saying that this is in any way wrong or disgusting. Don't like? Don't read.

For the others: have fun reading ^^

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Namjoons POV

I enter the mrs lees office, i can't believe I need advice...from a therapist...

It's been so long since I've been here, yet nothing has changed in that time, the walls are still tall and white, patients going in the therapists offices depressed and coming out depressed.

"Mr Kim Namjoon please come to room 6" a female voice could be heard through the loudspeaker system of the waiting room, making me sit up and leave my current room.

I knock on the door labelled with an incraved 6 and wait for an answer.

"Come in" mrs lee said through the door and I obey, letting my slender fingers turn around the door handle and push it down without hesitation.

Mrs Lee was seated on her usual spot, the white leather chair standing close to the wall. She stared at me with a slight smile showing on her lips.

"Good morning, Mr. Kim" I smile at her lightly, here goes nothing , i'm really doing this.

"Hello, mrs Lee" I take a seat on the white couch, being careful since I don't want to break anything...again.

"What brought you here today?"  She took a pen and paper from the little table next to her, on which also a package of chewing gum and a cup of coffee were neatly placed.

I leaned back in my seat, the couch wasn't exactly the most comfortable thing to be sitting on, but it's not like I have a choice.

"Well... It's a bit... It's probably something I shouldn't come to you with, but I could really use some advice."

"It's okay, just say what's bothering you." She said, not looking up from the paper in front of her.

"Well...urm... As you already know i'm ...well I'm gay. Totally gay. And I've been slowly falling for someone in the group."

"Do you want to say who?" She looked up at me with an unreadable expression playing on her face, eyes looking blankly at him and mouth sitting in an straight line.

"It's Jin hyung" I replied without hesitation.

"I don't see the problem. Isn't it great to be in love?" She asked, slightly furrowing her eyebrows in confusion and tapping her pen on top of her thigh, which was covered by her white dress.

"Yes..." I chuckled dryly." But what isn't great is the fact that I'll never be able to be with him."

"Why?" She wrote something down.

"Well...even if Seokjin hyung responded the feelings, as an idol we can't just come out of the closet like: 'HEY! I'M GAY!' It would ruin my career...and BTS." I folded my hands and laid them in my lap, gaze glued on the ground.

"Hm." Mrs Lee was busy writing down what I said.

"And as Jungkook was missing a few days ago, Jin was so out of his mind, panicking. I felt so bad seeing him like that, I just wanted to hug him tight and calm him down...never let him go...But that would have been wrong, and we were in public after all." I explained, tears building up in the corners of my eyes, making my sight blurry.[I was listening to crybaby from melanie martinez while writing this lol sry]

"I don't know what to do... " I whispered, but still loud enough for her to hear, as I wipe the tears out of my eyes.

"Well...you shouldn't keep it for yourself, or else it will eat you up from the inside, so atleast come out as gay in front of the other members." She looked deeply at me while talking slowly and I slightly nodded once she finished .

"But... What if they don't accept me anymore?" I looked terrified at her, making eyecontact with her, which she immediatly abruptly stopped cause she looked back at the notes she took.

"If they are good friends, they'll understand and even if not, it's still better than keeping it for yourself."

"Hm..." I replied, still not really convinced, but she's a doctor she must know best, also my time with her is almost up.

"Anything else?" Dr Lee asks while impatiently looking at her watch.

"No...I'll just gonna go, thanks Dr." I stand up and bow at her before walking towards the door.

"Have a nice day, Mr Kim"

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I hope I made it clear enough that Namjoon and yoongi have the same therapist, Mrs/ Dr Lee.

Btw I left my room for once and am at the beach right now~ and I kinda got used to the heat, yayyyy

~Lil