So, Why Are You In Here? *ON HOLD*

Chapter four: Barely Breathing

Day seven:

They took my diary away yesterday, something about a check up. I didn't pay much attention. Isabel is with me a lot more now, says I need good care.

My back rested against the fluffy white pillows on my bed, my neck craned in an awkward position and my right leg was crossed over my left. The separation anxiety was beginning to creep up on me, I just wanted to go home. I wanted to go see my little brother and my aunty.

It was 4:00pm and I finished all my programs for the day so I decided to go for a walk along the beach. Every clients room was on the beach so all I had to do was open the door and welcome the warm breeze, littered with sand and tiny droplets of water. I slipped off my flimsy shoes and pushed my toes deep into the sand. I always loved that feeling, each grain settle between my toes and all the grains together massaging my feet as I walked. We weren't allowed to go into the water without our carers, which is understandable.

I trudged over to the damp line of sand where the water washed up to before tucking under itself and rolling back into the ocean. Before thinking, I let my whole body drop into the sand. Every muscle and limb felt like jelly, and the warm sand felt comforting against my skin. I laid down on my back and starred up at the sky. Bright white stars were beginning to sprinkle the darkening sky. My heavy eye lids shut and I focused on the waves.

The body work teacher made us meditate after we had done our yoga. She said something about breathing, letting go, feeling air in your fingers..

Concentrate on your breathing,

Shut your eyes and breathe into the back of your eyes..

And out through your eye lids.

Crazy how I could actually feel the oxygen moving behind my eyes.

Roll your shoulders back into the ground and put your hands at your sides, palms facing the sky.

Focus on the tension leaving your body, through your fingers and your toes.

I wiggled my body deeper into the sand, not caring about it getting in my clothes.

Now breathe in for four seconds,

And breathe out for eight.

Feel the air flowing out of your lungs.

"Are you dead?"

I flung up from my little bed in the sand, flinging grains left and right. Logan stood above me, smirking as usual.

"No, I'm meditating. It's supposed to cleanse the body and get rid of negative energy." I emphasised the word 'negative'. How long will it take him to get the hint that I want to be left alone?

He shifted a little and just as I thought he was about to leave, he plopped himself down right next to me. More sand spilled over onto my clothes as he dug himself a little bed like mine. I angrily brushed the sand off, purposely flicking it onto him. He didn't seem to notice. He just rested back against the sand, arms behind his head, gazing at the stars. The moon cast shadows over his face, hiding the rash-like acne over his neck and jawline.

I laid on the sand, filled with a tense silence while I could actually feel the comfortableness radiating off him beside me. The loud, infuriating noise of him breathing took over the calming sound of the waves lapping at the sand, also earing a frustrated groan from me. He seemed to be totally oblivious to me, of course.

"My fear is of going back home."

I shot up, leaning back on my palms, and studied his features for any sign of lying or trying to mess with me. "Huh?"