Dear Ryder

Letter 1

Dear Ryder,

I saw you today. It was probably the highlight of my day. The sound of my name on your lips is the best thing I've ever heard. You stood there, in your white pants and black shirt, tall and so- oh God- so beautiful.

But I only ended up getting hurt, like I always do when it comes to you. I don't know why I leave myself open so much hurt and disappointment when it comes to you, but I only know that you're worth it.

When you love someone, you are ready to face the world for them. You are ready to fight anything and everything for them. Why? Because love is a promise. It is a promise that will bring a lot of negative vibes your way, a lot of disappointments your way. But love is keeping that promise anyway.

And even though it's just me, I will keep that promise. Because I love you no matter what, and to me, you're worth it.

But when I saw you laughing with her today, one of your hands in hers and the other on her waist, I wanted to be the one you touched. I wanted to be the one who made you laugh. I wanted to be the one you looked at like that: with love.

I couldn't help it when the tears rose. My vision was blurring, and I almost cried. And you most certainly would have known if you had looked at me. But you didn't. You looked at her, only her.

And I walked away.

I didn't want to. Oh God, I just wanted to stay and wrap my arms around you; to bury my head in your chest and let the world rush past and not care if the world ended and I wanted to never be afraid if losing you.

Which is funny, I can't lose you because you were never mine. You don't even find me pretty; don't deny it, you told me yourself.

I shouldn't have let that comment get under my skin, but love is raw. It strips down your guard and exposes every single part of you to that one person you would give everything for.

You are that person to me, and you have no idea how raw and insecure and horribly incomplete I felt.

I turned my heel and tried not to run away. I walked away because I didn't want you to see me cry. I walked away because I couldn't see you with someone else.

And someone so much better than me in so many different ways. Thinking about it now, I get why you want her. She's beautiful. She's smart. She makes you laugh. She's got everything that I don't have.

Honestly, I don't even know why I expected you to want me. I don't know why I thought that you might fall for me. I wanna hate you. I wanna hate you for making me fall in love with you and not loving me back.

But I guess this is karma. I couldn't love someone who loved me, and I fell in love with the person who doesn't love me.

It was ripping me apart as I took the back roads home, I couldn't see anything clearly because I was crying so hard.

I love you. You'll never read these letters, you'll never know how much I love you.

Loving you, Ryder Grayson, is madness. And it's the best kind of madness I've ever known.

Yours, Brooklyn.

******

A/N: Hey guys! So first chapter's up! Hopefully, you guys didn't hate it😂

Anyways, don't forget to vote and comment what you think!

Bye for now ❤

xx Brooke