Looking For The Stars

Chapter 2

Pudge Halter's POV-

"Okay, champ. Here we are, Culver Creek," Dad said as our car rolled to a stop outside of the school. "Oh! My little boy's gonna be a senior!" Mom exclaimed. She twisted around in her seat and cupped my jawline in her long, rose-painted fingers and placed a plump kiss on my cheek, marking me as her son with her lipstick. "Now, now, honey. He's not a boy. Ever since Speaker Day last year he's a man," Dad proclaimed proudly.

I rolled my eyes at that statement. "That's right, most boys go hunting or have a Bar Mitzvah to become a man. But in the Halter house, you have to hire a male stripper," I said, sarcasm oozing from my tone. I tried to run the lipstick stain on my cheek but Mom licked her finger and rubbed it away, leaving a wet spot on my cheek. "Mom!" I groaned. I lifted up the collar of my t-shirt to dry my cheek off. "I'm your mother, I'll be wiping things off of your face with my spit when your 30," she countered.

My t-shirt dropped back down and I examined my cheek in the mirror to make sure all of the lipstick residue was gone. "That doesn't make it any less disgusting," I argued. I sat back in my seat and waited for the sentimental goodbyes my Mom and Dad just looked back at me with concern in their eyes. "Miles, are you sure you're going to be okay this year?" Dad asked. "She died almost 6 months ago. I'm going to be fine," I reassured.

On the day I got home, Mom and Dad finally realized the audacity of my sadness because of Alaska's death. They almost didn't let me come back because they were convinced that the memory riddled campus would subject me to panic attacks or something. Mom sighed. "Alright. But if you ever need to talk, go straight to the payphone. Here, I'll give you some change just to make sure you have some," Mom urged. She dug her hand into her purse and retrieved a handful of loose change and dropped it into my hands. "Thanks?" I said and transferred them into the pocket of my shorts.

"Promise to call us?" Dad said. "Every Sunday," I promised. Before we got into the car and endured a 10 hour road trip from Florida, they both hugged me, for just a little bit too long, I might add, and that took care of the physical representation of affection. "You know we love you, Miles," Mom and Dad said in sync, taking care of the verbal representation which all parents find life-threateningly necessary. "And I love you guys too, I guess," I answered. I had already gotten out of the car and rounded to the open trunk. I took out my suitcases and closed the trunk. I walked up to my Mom's open window to give them my last goodbye's.

"Remember, no drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes," Dad warned. Well I can promise you no drugs, I thought. It was almost impossible to hide my cigarette habit which has only grown stronger after her death. I've been close to getting caught more than once, key word: close. Now I only have to worry about the Eagle catching me. "Got it. I'll be the example every parents can only dream their children to be," I said. They both smiled and Mom mouthed one more time: I love you. I returned it with a lopsided smile and gave a pensive wave goodbye as they drove away. Mom pressed her hand against her lips and blew an imaginary kiss to my cheek while Dad gave me a thumbs up.

Once the car was out of sight, I began to amble down the campus, observing the familiar buildings. I would say that I missed this place, but that would be lying. I missed the people in it. The Colonel, Takumi, Lara, Alaska. No, Pudge! You will not start off your year with some pathetic nostalgia over her. She wouldn't want you to waste your life away sulking about her, I told myself. I took a deep breath and stuck my chin up and tried to ignore the heat. "I go to seek a great perhaps," I told myself as I stepped through the doors of my dorm building. I walked down the halls to my room. The door was already slightly ajar, I couldn't compress the goofy smile already easing up on my face.

"Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm wearing clothes this time," I said as I kicked the door open with my foot. The Colonel was stretching one of those base sheets lined with elastic across his vinyl mattress, but he stopped to look up at me. "Damn it, I was looking forward to seeing your flat, skinny stomach," he swore. He let go of the sheet and his current progress snapped together like a huge rubber band and landed in a limp heap on the floor.

We did that awkward man-greeting where you fasten together your fingers and briskly hit their stomachs against yours. I've only seen the Colonel in person twice over the Summer, I drove up there and stayed with him and Ms. Martin for a couple days and he did the same with mine. Although we called each other constantly, it's not the same as having the one and only Colonel besides you in the flesh. "You still can, but it will cost you," I joked. The Colonel mockingly punched my arm. "Some other time, I don't have any singles on me," he replied. I smiled and brought my bags fully in. I set them next to my bed and unzipped them, decided to start with making my bed.

"Is it me, or is it hotter than usual here?" I inquired. The Colonel began to redo his sheets as he answered, "Oh shut up, you don't have to be here during the Summer. And when you came to my home, the sky was covered in clouds, like God smiled upon you. Speaking of home, Mom made some cookies and told me to give them to ya." He reached into his bag and brought out a plastic bag full of peanut butter cookies. He tossed them to me and I caught them and eagerly tore into them. I took a bite into the cookie and moaned because of the food orgasm taking place in my mouth, it's not everyday you get to have a cookie made my Ms. Martin, possibly the epitome of all cooks.

"I swear after you left my Mom looked at me and pretended I was you. Why do you have to be so damn lovable?" the Colonel asked to no one in particular. "Are you suggesting that you love me?" I said with a sly smile. The Colonel threw a pillow at my face. "They say the most common forms of flirting is teasing or being mean to your crush. So go ahead and admit that you're indisputably attracted to me," I dragged. "Boy you better shut that goddamn mouth of yours before I come over there a shut it for ya," he threatened. I knew he would do it, too, so I didn't say anything else but a smile was still present on my face.

After I made my bed, I pinned up the map of the world on the wall, trying to make this room look as much like it did last year as possible. The torn up couch and and box with "coffee table" labeling it in tape was already there. "Another girl has already moved into Alaska's room," the Colonel stated. A slightly desolate cloud covered out room with his words, because we knew that this year would never be able to touch last year without her. And the thought of someone else inhabiting the room where we always bought our cigarettes and drank Strawberry Hill and the girl I'm still in love with delayed her labyrinth with her own little dreams horrified me.

I hadn't realized that the Colonel already left the room, but he stuck his head back in and said, "Well are you coming to meet her, or what?" I caught up with him and we started to walk to Alaska's room. "Are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, can't we just let this girl live in her own room in peace?" I asked, wanting to dive in a pit of lions rather than go to Alaska's room where the ghost of her memory still lingered. "Can you honestly say that the curiosity isn't killing you right now? Besides, she might be hot," he said. She's probably just some snobby Weekday Warrior who spends the majority of her time curling her extensions and painting her nails and planning which extravagant party she's going to go to next, disregarding any thought of what memories have taken place in her room and the life of the girl who lived there before. Whoever she is, she's probably going to be just like everyone else.