'Vacation'

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I wanted to spring over the balcony. I imagined myself landing swiftly, like a cat jumping from a branch. I'd stand up, brush the dust off my shoulders, and run across the hard pavement, catapulting myself over the fence and throwing myself into the crashing waves that billowed into darkness. That's what I wanted to do.

Yet I knew that was impossible.

I sat on the corner of the balcony, curled up against the wind. It was warm out, but the breeze brought just enough cold for me to wear a sweatshirt. I was wearing adidas pants that smelled like a certain type of cologne. A friend had given them to me. Looking up from my phone, I caught the eyes of my dad lounging on the bed inside the hotel room. My eyes snapped back to my phone and I instinctively pulled my hat down further over my face. Our relationship had been strained ever since the divorce. I won't get into that though.. it's not important. I paused, listening to the rhythmic chirping of crickets and loud rumbling of a heater. There was a mumbling above me and a click of a door as people crept out into the night with their friends.

Fuck it.

The lights clicked off in the hotel room and suddenly I was hanging off the balcony, my feet dangling, searching for a foothold. A railing came to my rescue and I was down. The earth under my bare feet felt so good- I broke into a sprint. Putting my training to good use, I easily scaled the white fence and ran down the boardwalk along the side of the ocean. 

My phone rested on the balcony, so my dad couldn't track me. 

I stopped at the edge of the water. It was as dark as ink and just wild enough to be pulled into.. I imagined blurred hands reaching from the sea and grasping at my ankles. I took a step back. Something about the endlessness of the ocean thrilled me, but horrified me nonetheless.  It would be so easy to disappear without a trace.