Junior's loud cries woke me up from my sleep that I didn't even know I was in. I sighed and dragged myself up the stairs and into his room. It had been a month and whoever said that it would get easier had to be lying. They just had to be because I swear that these past few days my son hated me.
I had to put a stop to all the visits and had my phone turned off half of the time because I didn't want to talk to or see anybody. Before doing that I got on Facebook since news seems to travel faster that way and let everyone know we were fine. Like, I was a new mom so let me and the baby rest and stay to ourselves for at least six weeks.
The smell hit me before I had reached his crib. Fuck my life! Don handled all the poopy diapers and I didn't have time to yell for him because even in my presence Junior continued to cry. I wasn't going to leave my baby on the changing table while I went to find his father so I had to suck it up.
"Okay baby, I'm moving as fast as I can." I said scooping him up with the diaper and wipes already on the changing table. No wonder he was crying. His mess was sliding out of the diaper and up his back. "Shit." I cursed under my breath. Pulling some wipes out I wiped him off and pulled his onesie off and we made our way to the bathroom where I ran water into his baby bathtub.
He had settled down with the crying until I pulled him from the tub and dressed him. "Oh my goodness Junior what's the problem?" I asked him as if he could answer me as I attempted to feed him the milk in his bottle. He didn't want the milk.
I tried rocking him and singing to him. Nothing worked. Where the hell was Adonis? After dressing myself and pulling my hair into a ponytail I placed Junior in his car seat and we left the house. I circled the block in the car a few times and after a while, Junior just fell asleep. I looked at the dashboard and saw that I was low on gas so I pulled back into the driveway.
When the car stopped rolling the crying started back up. I hit my head on the steering wheel and we got out and into the house. Don was still nowhere to be found. I entered the kitchen with Junior in my arms and placed him in his swing. He was going to continue crying because I wasn't planning on getting back in that car. I had no choice but to tune the crying out while just making sure that he was alright swinging.
Once I had my dinner of sautéed chicken breast, broccoli and cheese with rice almost finished Don came strolling into the kitchen. He went straight to our crying son. "Do you not hear him crying Britni? What the hell." He has some nerve. "I heard him, I heard him all day. I tried getting him to be quiet for the past four hours." I said in a dry tone.
"Well why is he quiet now that I have him?" Don asked as I looked to see Junior sleep and quiet. "I don't know." I mumbled lowly while turning back to the food.
How could he disappear and be gone all day and then come in mad that the baby was crying? Doesn't he know I tried everything that I could to get him quiet? It was clear that he just wanted Don. I couldn't help but to feel angry and upset that I was unsuccessful at keeping my son calm today. Not knowing where Don was didn't make it any better.
"Britni." Don said coming back into the kitchen placing the baby monitor on the counter. "Adonis." I said back. "Come here." He sat down and patted his lap. I walked to him and stood there playing with my fingers. Don pulled me onto his lap. "I'm sorry for talking to you the way that I did when I came in." He apologized.
"Okay." I said. "What happened to you saying you accept?" I gave him the same twisted look that he was giving me before he cracked a smile. "Gimme a kiss." I leaned in and gave him a quick kiss on the lips before getting up to make our plates. "That's all the kisses that I get?" "Yup." I said not turning around.
I placed our plates on the table and grabbed two glasses and the pitcher of sweet tea. "Are you okay?" Don asked not bothering to touch his food but staring at me instead. "No I'm not okay if you want me to be honest." He watched me before tasting his food.
