Shawn Mendes Imagines

22. Running Low

Y/N's perspective

It was a lazy day for me today. I just wached some TV and checked my phone all day. I can't wait for Shawn to come back from work, I'm getting so bored. Shawn has been working really hard for the next leg of his world tour which is starting in a few days. He has to make it perfect for his fans. He wants to make it perfect for his fans.

It's currently 9.00 PM, and I'm fucking craving his kisses, his scent, and simply him. It's hard sometimes not to see him as much as I'd like to... After a hard day of work like this one, he usually feels tired, and I can clearly see it because of his lazy eye that is more noticeable than on a regular day.

Even if all that tiredness could make him feel grumpy or rude, he never acts like that. He has never failed to make me smile when he passes the door of the living room and kisses my neck softly from behind, or when he buys me flowers or just my favourite ice cream after going to the gym. He's so caring and loving.

These thoughts make me get butterflies in my stomach, and I'm now even more excited for Shawn to come home.

A good 30 minutes later, I hear a noise of keys in the lock of the front door. My mind goes crazy at the thought of the love of my life standing right behind the door. He then appears in the hallway, and I raise from the couch and walk to him. He looks so exhausted, more than the usual...

"Hey, baby." I say softly, no wanting to seem too brisk.

"Hey..." He sighs in response.

I find that a bit weird from him not to have more emotions in his voice, but I don't raise it because I know he's already really stressed with the tour. He doesn't need to argue now.

I simply wrap my arms around his waist and pull him closer to me, my head pressing against his torso. I stand on tip-toe to reach his lips, but he doesn't kiss me back. I'm a bit surprise and decide to pull away and let him go.

Something's wrong today...

I try to make eye contact with him, but it's impossible since he's looking at the ground and doesn't want to lift his head up.

"Babe, are you ok ?" I ask.

"Y-Yeah, just a rough day..." He mumbles.

I furrow my eyebrows, still looking at him closely.

"Shawn... Don't lie to me. What's happening ? Did something happen with the guys ? Bad news from Andrew or... ?" I say, now extremely worried.

"Y/N, I promise all is fine with my job." He answers harshly.

The lack of pet names hurts me because he usually calls me with cute nicknames instead of my first name. "Y/N" sounds so weird said like that...

He notices he hurt me and tries to come up with an excuse but only stutters instead.

"I-I just..." He runs his hand through his hair and tugs at it slightly.

"What, Shawn ? Please tell me. I'm here to support you, I will always be there." I force him a bit to finish his sentence.

"I don't know how to say this, Y/N..." He begins but stops for a second.

My heart starts to beat faster and faster, I know it won't be good news. He takes a deep breath and opens his mouth again, hesitating.

"I c-can't keep up with our relationship... I-I want to stop this here." His eyes are stuck on the ground, but I can clearly see they are watering slowly.

My heart breaks as I watch him speak, and tears are making their way down my cheek.

"I-I don't manage to make you happy and focus on my career at the same time. I know you suffer when I'm not at home and when I'm touring, but... it's my dream and there's no second chance in this industry..." He confesses. "I love you, and I don't want you to get hurt even more because of me. My tour starts in 2 days, and I know us... We won't be able to bear the distance, and the lack of seeing each other everyday. I want to end this up now."

A crying mess, that's what I am right now. The most important man in my life wants to leave me.

"N-No, Shawn. You can't do that."

"Y/N... Please, don't make it harder than it is."

"No, no, no ! I-I love you so much, I can't stand to lose you. I need you." I cry and gasp for air afterwards.

"Y/N, just know that it's for the best. You'll find someone else. Someone who can make you happy and treat you like the real princess you are. Someone who will give you the time I didn't give to you. I'm not that person, and it hurts me every time I think about it. You deserve so much more than I can give you. I'm sorry."

"NO, SHAWN, NO !" I yell, my hands shaking. "You're the one I want and love. You make me feel beautiful every time you lay your eyes on me, every time you touch me. You make me smile when I'm not in the right mood, and you make me laugh when I'm angry. You're all what I've ever wished for. I don't care if you go on tour for 3 months, 6 months or one year. I'll wait. Even through the phone, when I hear your raspy morning voice, I feel like I'm the happiest girl in the world. We will face that, distance doesn't matter."

A tear finally rolls down his cheek and drops on the floor.

"You can't do this to me, Shawn..." I add and look at his swollen eyes and red cheeks.

"I'm sorry, Y/N." I hear him say before his large hands cup my face, and his lips meet mine one last time.

He then pulls away and climbs upstairs. I stay here, in the middle of the hallway, my chest rising and falling quickly. My hands tugging at my hair, and tears running my face. I'm going crazy.

I hear the stairs cracking a few moments later, and I see his large figure standing in front of me, holding a bag with his clothes and other stuff in it.

"Shawn..." I whisper.

He opens the door and glances once at me before shutting it behind him.

Not even a "goodbye" or a "I wish you the best".

My heart's broken into a million pieces.

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I get goosebumps every time Shawn sings "Use somebody". This cover is life.