and i felt life for the very first time.
i felt the paradox of emotion for the first time in forever.
when i got home, on the day that changed my life, my emotions lost all their chromosomes and they didn't know what to do.
whether to be happy, sad, embarrassed, nervous or whether to go back to my numb state of being.
after all, i don't even know this stranger's real name, so how embarrassing could talking to him be?
but,
i felt life for the very first time,
with the sun evaporating my melanin of gold and numbness into thin air, and then being soaked up by a cloud which precipitated emotions back onto me.
this demon in the dark had only muttered two sentences to me and i'm acting as if he resurrected my dead soul of bugs and beetles into a beautiful constellation of eridanus.
and i felt life for the very first time,
i stretched my hand all the way into the picture frame of god's clay room, and dipped my fingertips into the heartbeats of the wildest beasts in the deepest slumber.
and i felt life for the very first time,
i more than just felt it,
i fondled the living soul out of the embodiment of life and my breathes have never made me feel more worthy of them than at this very moment.
it wasn't the fact that i talked to this radiant stranger, it was the fact that talking to this radiant stranger released emotions in me which I hadn't felt in quite a while.
i felt as if i were doing the dance of death in a technicolor beat.
i felt like the sound of tsunami waves crashing against the screaming bodies.
i felt like a paradox.
even though i had emotion, they were quite unknown.
but i was unbothered, i felt something.
i felt life for the very first time.
//
chapter 1.1
