Scattered Sanity (Sanvers)

Day Six.

Minutes felt like hours as they dragged along, extending the time Alex spent in each waking moment. The reality of her situation had settled in, and after six days spent away from the people that she cared about, without a single glimmer of hope or a sign that they were still investigating to find her, made her outlook bleak. Her arms remained suspended above her, though her wrists were bloody from relentless struggling, the crimson streaks weaving down her forearms and leaving stains in their wake. While her lower half was, thankfully, clothed again, she had received no shirt to replace the tattered one that lay on the ground, collecting dust, so her stomach was still completely visible. Every time Alex caught even the slightest glimpse of her ruined shirt, bile rose in her throat, bringing her back to the mere two days ago, when she had experienced the worst emotional trauma of her life. She was disgusted in many aspects, of which included her resenting herself for showing so much weakness to an enemy. Alex had undergone training for a hostage situation before, and even if she wasn't prepared to face this kind of assault, she didn't take it as an excuse to let the opponent gain leverage over her. It was haunting.

Alex had noticed that every evening, Rick disappeared out of her line of vision, and then he would reappear in the morning. His visits were mainly composed of beatings and routinely asking her who she loved. She hadn't succumbed to him yet, and she didn't plan to, ever.

As if on cue, Rick strolled in lazily, his arms folded and a smug grin on his face. "Good morning, Alex!" He cooed.

The redhead scowled up at her captor. "Rick." She spat venomously, a fiery rage igniting her words as they sprang from her vocal chords.

"Now, now, what's with the attitude?" He chided mockingly. "I found something that you might appreciate. Would you like to find out what it is?"

"I'd like you to go to hell." Alex snarled.

Rick shrugged. "Guess you won't get to hear what your precious Maggie Sawyer wanted to talk to you about, given her twenty missed calls. Seems a little possessive to me."

Alex jerked her head up, intrigued. "What did you say about Maggie?"

Rick laughed. "I thought that might interest you." He sighed, reaching for his pocket and pulling out a familiar-looking phone. Alex's phone. "I confiscated your phone when you were unconscious, and honestly, your friend -"

"Girlfriend." Alex corrected.

"Don't interrupt me. Anyways, she would not stop calling you. It was quite irritating, frankly. I almost blocked her, but I figured that I could use these against you."

"How so?"

"Oh, please. I've seen you around her, Alex. I know how much you think you care for her. The second you hear her voice, you'll completely break. Face it, she's your Kryptonite."

Alex's face settled grimly, unresponsive.

"Let's play one from four days ago, shall we?" Rick proposed, tapping the screen of Alex's phone and turning up the volume.

Maggie's voice instantly flowed out of the speakers, cushioned with mild static, but loud and clear enough for Alex to hear everything she was saying.

"Baby, everyone here at the DEO is working hard to find you, and we will, I promise. Just hold on for me, okay? We'll be there in no time." A short laugh. "I don't even know if you can hear me. I might be talking to no one right now. Just, please, hang on. I will be there."

"Aw, how sweet." Rick jeered. "Too bad she wasn't true to her word. How about another two?"

"Hey, this is a lot harder than we anticipated, and we are having some trouble gaining ground on how to get you back. But I wanted you to know that we are definitely coming, and that you should have faith in us and hang on. I'll be there before you know it, Alex."

"Alex, we only have a few hours left, and whoever is behind this has hidden you well, because we haven't been able to find anything. We're trying our very best, but no one can seem to get any leads. Kara's tried everything, she's flown all over National City and done her best to X-Ray vision as much as possible, but she has her limits, too. I want you to know that I'm not going to give up on you, no matter what." Her voice was broken by a sniffle and a shaky breath. "I can't lose you. I can't. Please, hold on."

Rick snickered. "I think we have time for one more. Oh, and this one is long."

"Alex, we have a few minutes to spare, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but we're at a dead end. There's not enough time, and the situation seems impossible. I don't want this to be goodbye. I don't, and I won't let it be that. I won't give up until I find you, but there are things I need to say.

"Alex Danvers, you have changed my life forever. From the moment I met you, I was drawn in by your captivating presence. You are strong, incredibly so, and the most badass woman on this planet. I don't know what I'd do without you by my side, and I don't want to even imagine that. I feel like I'm being robbed. I truly wanted to spend my life by you. I wanted to have a lifetime of firsts with you as my girlfriend, I wanted us to move into a little house together and argue about how to do the dishes and adopt a dog. There are so many things I have never had the courage to tell you, because I was so afraid that you would reject me. Now I regret not having that bravery. But I have to tell you this now, whether you will hear this or not.

    "Alex, I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone in my entire life. I have given up my heart to you completely, something I've never been able to do since my parents kicked me out." She sobs, so remorsely that it sounds like her heart is splitting in two. "I love you, and I'm sorry that I never told you. And I don't care what this stupid clock says, I am going to find you."

Tears trickled down Alex's bruised face, and she took in short gulps of air, her head hanging in defeat. Listening to how resigned her girlfriend sounded was worse than anything she had experienced up to that point. She wanted to run to Maggie and scoop her up in a ginormous hug, tightening her arms around her torso and never letting go. She wanted to hold Maggie close, running her hands through her brunette waves, pushing pieces of hair behind her ears and cradling her face before kissing her. She missed everything about Maggie, from the way her breath would always smell of bubblegum because she hated mint toothpaste, how she could never win a game of pool, how her eyes lit up when she saw a cool gun, to the sound of her laugh, which resembled a ripple of sunshine. Alex felt so lost without her. "I love you too, Maggie." She choked out hoarsely, though she was only speaking to a voicemail. "I do, I really do. I love you."

Her sentiments were cut off by a sharp slap across the face. "No, you don't love her, you're delusional." Rick stated. "And you're never going to see her again, so you might as well start believing it now."