I Wanna Be Yours

Chapter 10

If love is what you want
Then girl, I think you're lost
But if I've done what you crave
Then I'm right here for you, babe

'Cause I don't wanna get caught up in something
If I can't see it through, oh no
I know you wanna see something deep
But I'll end up blinding you, oh no
~Dangerous - James Reid

Leah watched Clark down his third tequila shot. She slowly sipped her vodka and tonic. She had slowed down on drinking once she realized that Clark's aim was to get himself as drunk as possible. At least one of them had to keep their head tonight.

"You know, I'm starting to think that real love...romantic love doesn't exist." Clark gestured with his empty shot glass.

"Sobra ka naman," Leah said.

"Well, it doesn't last forever. Scotch on the rocks," he told the bartender.

"Hindi ah. May forever. Ang Tatang ko mahal na mahal niya ang Nanang ko. Kahit higit sampung taon na patay ang Nanang ko, hindi nag-asawa ulit ang Tatang ko. Hindi nagka-girlfriend, hindi man lang nag-date. 'Yan ang loyal," Leah said proudly.

"So you really believe that?" Clark asked. "You should love one person forever?"

"Oo." Leah took a sip of her drink.

"But what if the person you love doesn't love you back?"

"Kung totoong mahal mo, masaya ka kung saan siya masaya."

"Okay, so what if your ex meets another girl, falls in love with her and then marries her in a month? You'll just be happy because he's happy?"

Leah glared at him. "Huwag ka naman ganyan, o."

"What if you fall in love with someone and you think they love you back...pero hindi mo alam, may ibang pamilya na siya. Nagmamahalan kayo pero hindi mo alam, nakakasira ka ng buhay."

She stared at Clark's slouched form over the bar counter. His hypothetical scenario sounded deeply personal and she wondered who he was talking about.

"Bakit ba kasi puro tragedy ang iniisip mo? Ang dami naman love stories na may happy ending!" She argued.

"What happy ending?" Clark scoffed.

"'Yung magpapakasal sila, magkakaanak, tatanda sila na magkasama..."

"And then one of them dies. If they don't separate first."

Leah glared at him. "Ang nega nito."

Clark laughed. "What? That's life! Even if you do find your 'soulmate' or whatever, one of you is gonna die first and the other person's life will be shit because they completely revolved it around this person that's now gone. Is that a happy ending? Maybe for the person that died first."

There were tears in Leah's eyes and she hated it. She hated that Clark's words could affect her. "Alam mo, hindi ka nakakatuwa."

She jumped off the barstool, calculating in her head how much a taxi might cost. Clark grabbed her arm.

"Wait. Leah, wait. I'm sorry."

"Ang hirap mong kausap."

"I'm sorry. Don't leave, please," he begged. "Let's just change the topic, okay? I'm sorry for upsetting you."

There was no reason that Leah should stay. It was late, they've had a lot to drink, she had already skipped an entire day's work just to indulge Clark. But when she looked into his pleading eyes...Leah couldn't walk away. She sat back down on the stool.