love in the 21st century//jancy

19.

friend, please...

"Mike? Mike!" Nancy tumbled through the bathroom door, pushing past a man who was standing at the sink washing his hands and startling another man at the urinal so badly that he almost fell over.

"Hey, lady!" the man at the sink shouted. "You can't be in here!"

"Have you seen my brother?" she asked, wild-eyed and frantic. Her hands were shaking, and she could hardly get control over her breathing. Every thought in her mind made her feel like she should prepare for the worst. "He's about two inches taller than me, same facial features, lots of freckles, black hair-"

They both shook their heads. "You should call the police. I'll tell the barista." They both walked out, and Nancy felt like she had swallowed a whole package of nails. Jonathan and Will came crashing in after her, dragging Holly behind them. Holly. God, Nancy had been so intent on finding Mike that she'd forgotten her little sister. She was the worst big sister in the entire world. This was all her fault. All of it. She should never have brought them here.

"There's his phone," Will said, pointing to a small, black rectangle resting on the broken tiles.

Nancy did not hesitate. She rushed to grab it, noting that the screen was broken, as if it had fallen out of his pocket...or he had tossed it down on purpose. She tapped the screen and was surprised to see that it was not locked. As soon as she entered into the phone, she wished that she hadn't. A notepad entry was pulled up with a message typed out and addressed to her.

Nancy,
I'm sorry. I didn't want it to be like this, but I just can't stand it anymore. I've tried to fight it, but it's like a monster dragging me down, and I'm powerless against it. I love you and Holly and Mom and Dad, but I'm tired. I don't know how to explain it. Just don't think bad of me. And don't come looking for me. It'll be too late.

With all my love,
Mike

Her hands were shaking so badly that she dropped the phone on the floor again. Jonathan reached out to her, and her legs gave out. She sank to the floor, burying her face in her hands and letting out the first week sob from her body. No. Nonononono. She could not let Holly see her crumple like this. Jonathan stuck his hand out to her, trying to help her up, but she knew she had to get up on her own.

"Something was really wrong," she said, wiping away her tears. Her breathing was still shallow, but she was forcing herself to stay strong, to think. "I don't think it was just with our parents. Mike was acting just like himself before we got here, and then...I don't know." She grabbed Holly's hands in hers and squeezed them tightly, then pressed them up against her lips and kissed them gently.

"What's wrong with Mike, Holly?" she asked, but she was more so talking to herself than her little sister.

But Holly answered. "He was sad."

Nancy stared at her sister, shocked. Holly was never much for words. For the first couple of years of her life, they were afraid she might be mute, but then she finally spoke, and ever since then, they had just decided she didn't much like talking. But she was observant. More observant than Nancy was.

She shook her head, fighting back tears that were trying to spill over, and gazed up at Jonathan. "What do we do? He could be anywhere by now! This is such a big city. I don't even know -"

"Hey." Jonathan crouched down in front of her, at first just staring into her eyes, but then  hesitantly, he grabbed her hands in his. They were warm and soothing, and Nancy couldn't help but feel a rush of relief ripple through her. "We've got an open window, so that's a good place to start. He crawled out from there, and then ran. We can trace him, Nance. All we have to do is take it one step at a time. We're gonna get to him, okay? But I need you to stay with me. I need you to stay calm. Just breathe. And stay focused. Can you do that?"

She closed her eyes, soaking in his words. It was hard to remain calm, but his words put her a little at ease. At least enough to clear her mind of all the bad things that could have happened already. She made herself believe that it was not too late.

"Should we split up?" she asked.

He looked just as unsure as she felt. "Maybe...we could cover more ground that way. You and Holly could go left, and Will and I'll go right?"

Nancy swallowed the hard lump in her throat and forced herself to nod. "Yeah...and you can call if you find anything. Just...if you find him...as soon as you do..."

"I'll call."

"Stop him."

Jonathan's dark eyes met hers, and he nodded and released her hands. Without another word, he grabbed his brother and dragged him out of the bathroom, and Nancy did the same with Holly.

Nancy could not tell if Holly was panicked; the child was pretty good at hiding her emotions. Nancy wasn't even sure if Holly fully understood what was going on. She did not want to explain it, not until she had to...

No, she did not want to think like that. The very thought of finding Mike hurt...or worse...or maybe not finding him at all...

She wiped at her eyes again and grabbed Holly's hand tighter as she pulled her out onto the street.

She should have talked to Mike more. She should have asked him more about how he was feeling. Instead, she stayed at college until the very last minute. And even when she had come home, she had allowed Mike too much alone time in his room with his thoughts. What else was going on in his life? The bullying had stopped, hadn't it? He had his friends?

Slowly, with trembling fingers, she opened Mike's phone again. She did not have answers to the questions that plagued her mind. But she knew where to start.

She went into Mike's contacts and dialed Lucas Sinclair's number.