The next morning, Harry awoke to the sound of Ron cursing at something, but he was rather surprised to see him cursing at an owl.
"Goddamit just hand that bloody thing over to me !" he shouted, while trying to take the letter, but he kept missing the owl, and when Harry got up, the owl made a jerk into his direction, landing on his shoulder. Carefully, Harry took the letter, in fear the owl could attack him, and opened.
"So who send that bloody thing ?" Ron asked, "whoever it is, that person really didn't want anybody else to open it".
"It's... it's from Snape ?" Harry answered confused. Considering Snape's hatred towards him, he wouldn't have expected him to send a letter to him. Usually, Snape loved to embarrass him in front of the whole class, so he was rather surprised to be messaged like this. He opened the letter, but when he read it he felt his heart drop. Snape wanted to talk to him about the incedent.
"So what does he want ?" Ron questioned, as he tried to sneak up on Harry to read the letter.
"N-nothing !" Harry answered, quickly stuffing the letter in his pocket "it's just a note about my detention, I already expected it since it was him who found me". Harry laughed nervously as he replied, and Ron just shrugged his shoulders and left. "Again... that weird reaction", he thought. Harry wondered if Ron was suspicious of him. "Technically",he thought."I didn't even lie, did I ? But if he and Hermione are suspecting something I better be more careful. I don't want to get in trouble after all, and Hermione'd be the first to tell Dumbledore and Ron would totally let it slip to the other students. I can't risk that, my reputation is already bad enough." Harry sighed, put on his uniform and left the room, heading towards the grand hall. When he arrived he instantly spotted Hermione and Ron quietly exchanging words. Taking a deep breath, Harry cleared his throat, Hermine and Ron instantly separating. "Oh ho harry", Hermione said, laughing nervously, followed by Ron, who murmured a silent "'morning", looking down. "so", Harry started, ignoring the awkward silence "finally back at Hogwarts I guess, and I already got myself into trouble haha". Even thought Harry tried to sound as normal, happy and cheering as he used to, the silence remained. "I guess you'll have to survive Quidditch without me for the first weeks or so Ron", Harry tried again "you are planning to go aren't you ?". Finally Ron looked up, gladly answering "of course ! I've been waiting to join forever !". "It would be better if you concentrated on school Ronald", Hermione added in a snarky manor to which Ron groaned in response. Harry laughed at the situation, relieved to ease into the light conversation. He let his eyes wander around, fixating on Snape who was watching him intensely. What did this man want from him ? And why would he care to make sure only he could read the message ? What is he planning on doing today ?
"right Harry ?" - Harry's head turned around and he hastily answered with a short "yes sure" not even knowing what was being discussed at the moment. To avoid any more awkwardness, Harry excused himself and quickly left the table. As soon as he had left the grand hall, he headed towards the sleeping chambers, in order to have some time alone, he still had 30 minutes before he needed to go to his first class, which was, oh the irony, potions. As he arrived in at the fat lady, he was surprised to see the door open. He entered the room, somewhat suspicious, and looked around when he heard a sharp voice calling him by his last name. "Potter !" It was Professor McGonagall "I was informed by some Gryffindors, that there is something bothering you. Mrs Weasley further ensured me, that you are trying to hide something from her, so I came to check on you". "oh me ? I'm quite alright, don't worry professor", Harry said, as neutral as possible. "Oh really", the teacher replied, eying him suspiciously "your friends think otherwise"."Oh well, I just needed some time after...", Harry broke off, looking down trying to keep his neutral facade. Professor McGonagall sighed sadly, putting her hand on his shoulder "I know it's been a tuff summer Harry. But you know, Sirius dead wasn't useless, he died saving you. Theres no need for you to feel guilty, it wasn't your fault Potter. Right now you are our biggest hope, and everybody would've done the same" Harry looked up, thanking her for her support, but on the inside he was boiling with anger. He was sick of hearing how Sirius's death wasn't for no reason, because he saved him. As soon as McGonagall had left the room, he kicked against one of the chairs, not even caring for the pain in his toe. Nobody seemed to understand him. He didn't care whether he was the chosen one or not, it didn't matter ! How could everyone just ignore, that Sirius was dead ? How dare they all sugarcoat it ? How dare they think telling him to "remember it was okay since he was saved" would be any good ? Harry kicked the chair again, this time hard enough to make it fall. His toe throbbed, but he didn't care, this pain was nothing compared to the anger he felt right now. He continued kicking the chair violently, cursing it and releasing all the anger he felt right now. About his so-called friends, who betrayed him, about Mrs Weasley and McGonagall, all the anger he had felt since the new school year started. "fuck, Fuck, FUCK !" he shouted at the chair only stopping when he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Hermiones. "Easy there Harry", she said in a shaking voice, but he instantly shrugged her hand off. "Leave", he demanded, not facing here. "But Harry...", she tried- "Leave !", Harry repeated in a louder voice. "Mate we were only trying to help yo- "LEAVE !", Harry shouted at Ron. He turned around, looking at both of them in anger "I'd rather not talk to you, after this delightful chat I just had with Mrs McGonagall, who told me that "some Gryffindors" informed her that there's something wrong with me. Are you for real ? You can't even talk to me about something that bothers you ? And you dare to call yourselves my friends ? Just leave already, leave me alone ! I'm really relieved I didn't talk to you about anything, because it seems you can be trusted at all ! I really expected more from you, after all you were my best friends !" "But..but Harry", Hermione tried "no Hermione don't even try to explain. You two can just leave you know ? I'm better off without you if I can't trust you !" "Oh you can't trust us ?", Ron asked furiously, "after everything We've done for you ? " "Well you don't have to be angry anymore Ron, you won't ever have to do anything for me again. I'll gladly remove this "burden" from you" , Harry answered. Before anyone else could say something, Harry grabbed his bag and left, too angry to care what would happen now. "Oh no you won't !", Ron said, grabbing his shoulder "this isn't over !" "get your hands off me !", Harry shouted, "and leave me alone ! I'm fine on my own, and I don't need you !" "Oh really ? OH REALLY ?", Ron shouted even louder than Harry himself. It seems Harry had hit a nerve "Well you won't have any problems being alone, theres no one left anyway" , Ron snorted. Harry stepped back"good", he replied, his voice shaking "I'll be off then if you don't mind". Harry ran away as quickly as possible, tears filling his eyes. He heard Ron shout something behind him, but he was already to far away to hear him. Harry just ran, down the stairs, through the already empty halls and right into professor Snape's arms. Snape, confused and shocked looked down on Harry. Harry Potter, the boy he hated the most, was had run into him, and slowly fell back. Harry was already prepared to feel the concrete floor when two strong arms grabbed him, and pulled him into a tight embrace. Harry, too confused to figure out anything that was happening right now, tightly clung to his professor, crying into his shoulder. Even Snape himself just held the young boy in his arms, all the feelings of hatred and antipathy vanishing. Right now nothing of that mattered, then only thing that mattered right now was this sobbing young boy, who reminded him so much of himself.
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So, I'm still alive I guess... I'm really sorry it took me son long but school has been keeping me busy. I hope you liked the chapter ! I hope I'm not going to fast on the snarry part but I couldn't surprise myself any longer I guess so I thought "just a bit.... just a bit...". I hope you still enjoyed it ! As always thank you for all the support, your comments really motivate me ! See you in the next chapter
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Enlightenment in my Darkness ~ snarry
Romance"Hold me, save me, don't leave me !" It's his sixth year in Hogwarts, and Harry is struggling with the loss of his godfather Sirius. He doesn't know how to handle the pain, and feels guilty. He doesn't know who to talk to, as it seems, that nobody q...
