The Badboy and The Jailbird

Chapter 17 "Only beauty like this in dreams"

After a 45 minute drive, I pull up to the building, brown dust in the air settling around me. I can barely make out Mt. Hood on the horizon. There is a gloomy fog in the sky making all the stars invisible which makes me sad because this is one of the best places to see them.

 Walking up to the old saloon, I pull out on the door until it comes loose. Dusting off my hands I step inside, immediately being enveloped in the smell of the cedar wood furniture and dusty concrete floor.

There is a brick fireplace to my left that still had half-burnt wood in it, probably from over 15 years ago, with a set of couches and seats surrounding it. Towards the back of the rustic brown building is an old pool table, around 40 years old. 

To the right, there is a long bar with broken bottles and beer behind it. Next to this a door to the bathrooms which are older than me, and a hell of a lot dirtier. All the way at the back of the large room is a door like a stereotypical saloon, with two swinging arched slats. This leads to the kitchen where I go first.

Once I have gone through the doors, I immediately know where to head. There is a large cabinet with one door hanging down, broken. Inside though, about 100 different kinds of chili, 60 different canned fruit, 25 different kinds of beans, 2 different enchilada fillings, and 4 different kinds of canned bread.

I smile knowing that its all still here. But almost a second after that smile turns to a scowl, and the memories come flooding back. 

-

A younger me is crying and running. Jessie is chasing after me but he is too tired to catch up and collapses to the ground. I am still in the black dress my mother got for me to wear on the sad occasion. 

Eventually, my lungs burn too much and I fall to my knees, the sobs overwhelming me. I look up with blurry vision and see headlights; then the bus pulls up next to me. As I stand up, I take note of the bench and bus stop sign. 

The skinny man opens the bus doors and asks where I'm going. I remember a small town my mother used to talk about where she grew up. 

Climbing the steps, I confidently walk up to the man and say 'Dufur, please.' He nods and holds out his hand. The confusion must have shown on my small face so he clarified. 'That will be $4.' 

I dropped my head and whispered quietly, 'I don't have money.' A pitiful look appeared on his face, and he used the outstretched hand to rub his neck. A heavy sigh escaped him and he nodded his head. 'Well go take your seat then.' I thanked him and walked past 2 people before I sat down. 

It was late, probably 11:40, and I was tired. Soon I fell asleep, only to be woken up by someone shaking me.

A middle-aged lady with dyed red hair looked down at me, and startled, I jumped back.

'Honey, it's ok. Rick said you wanted to go to Dufur? Well, we are here.' Her kind face eased my nerves and I nodded, getting out of my seat. She followed me to the door but sat in the driver's seat instead. 

The doors opened and I stepped out into the cold air. In front of me was an old building; it kind of looked like a saloon. I walked through the dirt while the bus drove off behind me. I couldn't get the door open so I climbed through a broken window. Inside was too dark to see anything, except the outline of a couch. 

I stumbled over, crying as my head touched the dusty cushions. That night I dreamt about all my memories of her, our time playing in the grass behind my house, and when Jessie would take us for ice cream at Georgie's Diner.

I stayed here for three days following her funeral, exploring, making old canned food on the old stove, and crying. A lot of crying.

Finally, I missed my mother and Jessie. I waited at the bus stop again. It took 20 minutes for one to show up.

Thankfully the driver was the same guy who picked me up the first time. I walked up the steps and he looked at me hopefully. 'You know, they've been looking for you.' I nod. 'Would you like to go home?' I nod again and take a seat in the empty bus.

I stare at the window until I finally see some familiar scenery. When I see my house, I tap the man on the shoulder and he lets me off. As the bus leaves, my house comes into view across the street. Jessie and my mother are sitting on the porch. Sheila comes out with glasses of water in her hands but then she sees me. 

Dropping everything she runs to me. When Jessie and mom see what she's running towards they break into sprints. I am engulfed in a huge group hug. No one talks or asks me where I was. We just stand there on the sidewalk for what seems like forever. 

And all I think of is, Now what?

-

I sigh as a few tears run down my face. Grabbing a can of chili with one hand, I wipe tears with the other. The pot I put it in is quite modern. When I came here a few years ago, I stocked up with everything I thought I might need in case I needed to run away again. 

The stove gives me problems but I eventually get it on. 

My waiting for it to heat up, I text my mom and Taylor.

To: Mother

- Spending the night at Maxine's. Don't worry. Love you.

It sends after a few minutes because reception is bad but then I text Taylor.

To: The Asshole

- In Dufur tonight. Told my mom I'm at Maxine's tho

- Where did you go after we talked?

I set my phone on the coffee table and walk back to the kitchen. I stir the chili and grab a bowl, dumping a healthy serving into it. 

There is a record player behind the bar that I turn on. 

The Beatles - Greatest Hits plays.

Twist and Shout  becomes background music.

I pour myself a Whiskey sour with old alcohol behind the bar, and sit and eat my chili.

"Well Shake it up Baby now, Shake it u-" My singing is interrupted when my phone beeps twice. It's Taylor.

From: The Asshole

- Why the hell r u in Dufur?

- Nvrmd. I'll call u

Less then 10 seconds later, he calls.

"What?" I answer.

"Hi to you too." He chuckles. "Why are you in Dufur?"

I groan. "Because I got bored."

He chuckles again. "You took a 45-minute ride to Dufur at 10:30 at night, because you were bored? I mean where are you anyway?"

"At an abandoned saloon. And yes." I smile smugly even though he can't see me. Now Strawberry Fields plays in the background.

"Are you playing the Beatles?"

"Yeah, why?"

He doesn't answer my question, but says, "I'm coming to you. Send me your location."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes!"

"Fine."

I hang up and send him my location. My stomach does a few flips at the thought of someone else finding my secret place but I try and forget it, taking a few more sips of my drink.

Shit. I realize I forgot to ask him where he went.

Oh well, he's coming anyway.

I spend the time till he gets there, singing and dancing, eating chili, and drinking more whiskey sours.