Call of the Night

Part 14

Before the sun hid behind the mountains we've reached the cliff the overlook the village. Though we almost reached our destination, we didn't go trough. Instead Diao Chan carried me all the way at the edge. I was greeted by a pile of rocks, stock together. I was unsure of it but inside something broke and a excruciating pain emerges in the back of my head.

Carefully Diao Chan settles me to the ground, not far from the rocks. 

"This is?" I finally spoke as I grit my teeth, braking the silence that hover over us. I kept my eyes on the rocks and not sparing a glimpse at Diao Chan, who retreated.

"...It's father..." she says and sniffs the air.

As if I was enlightened, memories flooded before my eyes. Memories that is so dear yet I've completely forgotten. The murky face of my beloved is now very clear.

...Xi Guang... My Xi Guang... 

The father that I once knew was actually Xi Guang ---the man I so love with all my heart--- my betrothed. 

...

I am not a Mogwai.

I am not human

I am not a seventeen year little girl

I am not Diao Chan

No, I am not...

My real name is Shuiyu meaning "Water Jade". I have lived long enough to witness the great war of King Zhong Zui and Gai Zhen because I was there. I watched it occurred at a young age. I was there, watching my own father's death. I was born between Gai Zhen --a spirit demon-- and a siren, Princess Yu --- daughter of General Songdi of the 3rd Level of hell under the reefs--- .

After the war I swear vengeance against King Zhong Zui, the previous emperor. He killed my father before me and banished my poor pregnant mother. I was furious at him for having no mercy on us yet I could not blame him for the death of my father but I could not forgive him for the grief of my mother, which slowly killed her after giving birth. I gathered an army to go against him. Sadly I was not me who took his life but his illness. I turned to his successor instead, who is worst than his father's tyranny but ones again it was not I, who ended him but his brother Knight. 

Time passed and my anger against the royal family settled. I was a leader of the rebellion but a number of my army deserted me. They did not see the current king as a threat but instead worshipped him. Soon, I realize that there's no point of fighting when there is no reason to defy the king. I was traitor to my own realm and on top of list of criminals, there is no turning back. I walked the mortal realm with no meaning, I was dead inside.

During my aimless wonder, a village welcomed me in my pitiful form. They are a hardworking village and they came to me for comfort through my voice. I was a freak yet they did not fear me. 

One human man even loved me for what I am and I loved him back, Xi Guang. I thought it was a pleasant place to settle down and forget my past. I asked a priest to seal my power and make me forget the demon that I was so I can be with Xi Guang. Even though my power is sealed, I was still immortal. 

What went wrong? My Xi Guang has left me. Now I am once again left with nothing.

...

The kitchen was quiet when Diao Chan and I entered. The woman that I thought was my mother sat quietly by the table watching the fire dance in the table. 

"So you've come back" her voice was stone cold and she did not turn to look at me nor appreciate that I was there.

I crept in closer and sat at the opposite side of the table, in front of her. My eyes followed her gaze towards the fire. Diao Chan left us and shut the sliding door behind her.

"Should I still call you mother?" I said.

She flinched at the sound of my voice and said "That's no longer necessary. Call me by my name if you wish" 

"Then Meilin" I said.

"I'm sure yo have a lot in your mind" she says.

"Too many to count but first. Do you know who I am?" I say.

"Shuiyu" she replied.

"You are Xi Guang's wife" the words were torn in my throat.

She let out a painful chuckle "How wonderful that would've been if it's true but it is only by name"

"And Diao Chan is Xi Guang's child?" I said.

Mei stayed quiet. Every second that passed slowly kills me. How I would love to have Xi Guang's child with all my heart.

"No. He is my child with a shadow demon" she says. A relief escaped my fangs. she must've heard it "but Xi Guang thought of him as his son. Our child" there was a hint of irritation.

"Son? Diao Chan is a boy?" I blinked and look at her.

"Yes, he is my son. That's not even his real name" she says. She clenches her fist in the table

"Why is he pretending to be a girl?" I ask.

"Because of you, so all the men in the village will turn their attention away from you. Incase you did not notice your voice attracts attention" she closes her eyes.

I didn't know what to say to her. I was not sure if I had a right to comfort her.

"I really hated you, you know" she continues "If only you weren't here I thought maybe, just maybe Xi Guang would look at me. Why must you make him suffer? Do you know how much pain you've brought him? When you were asleep from being sealed after 30 years you did not even recognize him. Everyday he grew old and here you are young and healthy as wither away. How could you? He would have been happier with me."

Inside I grieved painfully but I tried my best to keep my composure. I shouldn't have made a promise with him.

I'm sorry Xi Guang....

Meilin stood and headed towards the door saying "you must be tired, we'll talk tomorrow"

I was left sitting there watching the fire as it become deemer. The night is cold. Diao Chan returned. He sat where his mother used to be. As I look at him I see it now. He is a man not a woman. When he met my gaze he looks away. Slowly I raised my hand towards him. The touch of my fingers in his skin made him flinched. Softly I turned his face to look at me.

I wonder if he'd look like you if I had a son with Xi Guang.

I swallowed the dream that is wasted away by time.

I may be asking for too much but if this child is Xi Guang's child then he is also mine. I will protect them Xi Guang. Both of them. Rest in peace my love.