NCT DOYOUNG FANFIC // Love was the Language I Didn't Know

Guilt

C H A P T E R 2 1

*AUTHORNOTEAUTHORNOTEAUTHORNOTE:

HOLY SSSSSSS IM SOO SORRY!! First iwant to ythank yall for not dropping th sub count lmao i thought i would have 0 again by thhe time i came back

secon d omglllll im so sorry. I said one month but it turned out to be idk 4 lmao?? Actually lmao im actually so sorry for just dipping on this fic. I have soo much work and i even did extra credit physics in the summer and it was just. Great, i go home study and sleep because of my workload. But still getting msgs and comments of support make me want to write again and finish this fic man(lol its almost done btw). Im just so happy taht yall liked this and i felt bad that i kinda just left but i just really couldnt do anything about it. Ill try and make it up by writing better and longer lmao just tysm and im so sorry

CHERRY BOMB WAS SO LIT TOO omg taeil looks so good in this comebak and mark finally has normal hair but styll where are winwin and yuta and johnny lines cmon sm i also like running 2 u 1111!! I think last eras album was better tho dkm

AND DAT NEW DREAM COMEBACK THO sm is really treating us nctzens wel BUT WHEN IS NCT U COMING BACK DAMIT and i wonder when a new unit will be dropping too ? hmmHM

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"Minmin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I missed you!!!"

"You've said this for the seventh time. I know you missed me and we already established that we are dearly contented to see eachother."

"Fine.. but I really did miss you, you know... ANYWAYS I forgot to ask how Korea was?! How was NCT!!!!!????"

"WELL... Korea was amazing!! Everyone was so kind to me beyond words. Even now I kinda miss some of them..."

"WELL HMph! YOU LEFT FOR A YEAR AND ...and you've been gone for a day and you miss them?! ...okay...OKAY!"

"Leiyahhhhhh!! you know I love youu!! Come here!"

"I was just messing...You are definitely telling me everything about Korea right now though!! Go!!"

"Well...before that..I kinda...kinda need some advice."

"What!!!??"

"Well... I kind of..need some dating advice."

"--D-d-DATING! YOU GOT YOURSELF A BOY WITHOUT TELLING ME!"

"I ....couldn't tell anyone...... But we've broken up now, if that helps."

"WHAAA----WHY!!"

"Well...I broke up with him. I thought he was too nice to other girls."

"WHA-WHAA.. HOW?! You know Minlee, from what I've learned myself, sometimes, boys are just unable to tell the difference between being polite or being too nice....ehhh or maybe it's the girls that can't see that fact properly."

"Wait...what!! Girls!? As in - ME?! yOU'RE saying it could be MY fault instead of his??!"

"Minmin..yes I am saying that. Maybe he's in a position where he has to interact with girls, so he just treats them like normal friends. Or maybe he has no choice to, whether he likes it or not. I mean, lots of idols are in relationships amidst treating their fans very kindly."

"...."

"Wait...you'RE NOT POSSIBLY...DATING AN IDOL RIGHT!??? NOT TRUE, RIGHT!!??"

I nodded quietly.

"WH-WHATTTTTT!!!!????? ,,.OK..BEFORE YOU DISH ON WHO IT IS...DONT TELL ME THAT WAS THE REASON?!! TOO NICE TO HIS FANS?!??"

I nodded again, feeling slightly resentful of my previous decisions.

"MINLEE!! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT!! HE'S AN IDOL!! YOU MADE HIM CHOOSE BETWEEN YOU AND HIS DREAM!!? HOW COULD YOU?!"

"Okay..Okay look! You're making me feel terrible! Of course when you put it like that I look so bad and feel so guilty!!! But it's hard for me too, okay??!! He lets those fangirls do and say anything to him and doesn't even bat an eye!! He might keep doing this forever without any of them ever knowing that he was taken all along!!!!"

"Minlee...stop overreacting. You're feeling guilty because you realize what you did wrong was an overreaction itself! Just think about it.... Why were you so jealous anyways? Did he ever treat his fans - in a two-second interaction - better than you?! And not only that..you broke up with him?!?! Minmin....I think you're in the wrong, but it was your choice anyways."

"....maybe..you sound right Leiyah..seriously.. But it still can't be all me!! Or..maybe it can. I feel bad now, but I really felt bad then too. I don't know, maybe I wasn't ready for a commitment. Or maybe I didn't trust him enough. I wonder how he feels.."

"You can fix everything as soon as you get to Korea! You can spend.. the minimal time you have here to figure your heart out."

"I guess I have no other choice but to.." I need to be sure of myself the next time I see Doyoung.

-

"Minlee!!! How was the exam??!!"

"Soft..ehehe"

"Ah..as expected from you of course. How much longer are you here for??!"

"Just another two days! Ah...Leiyah and I are going out for ice-cream!! Would you like to join us?!"

"Me? Ah...I already promised my boyfriend I'd see a movie with him today. His exam isn't over yet, so that's why I'm still here at school."

"Boyfriend?!! Wow...looks like people have been busy while I left.. Sooo... how is he?!?!"

"Well..I have time..do you have time? I might start gushing out for a while."

"Go ahead!! Ahh how I love cheesy romance.."

"Well....ahhh he's amazing!!! How did it start... Ahh yes! One winter day on the bus after school, I completely dropped dead asleep! I was awaken by him shaking me, and I realized that he had let me sleep on his shoulder! He even blanketed his jacket around me to keep me warM!! The butterflies from that day just kept getting larger! He always bought be a chocolate milk box at lunch, and we would always walk home together everyday. His confession...ahh!!!"

"AHH!! So cute!! What did he do?!"

"He...He kissed me!! I was so shy I could barely do anything..but he kissed me and it felt amazing!!! And..well..we've been dating ever since..hehehhe"

"Aww..that's so cu-"

"OH! There he is!! Minlee, you're here tomorrow too right?! I'll talk to you and tell you more then!! bYE BYE!!"

"Ah..yes okay bye!!" Wow..she must really love her boyfriend..

What she had said reminded me of how I used to feel as well...when I was with Doyoung..

I remember how happy I felt whenever I saw him..and whenever he would care for me and pay extra attention to me..

I remember how much I used to smile whenever I received clingy text messages from him..

I remember how much my heart used to beat when we kissed and went on dates..

And I remember the jealousy and pain I felt when I saw him without me..

I remember how much I really liked Doyoung..

My heart started to heart..

But it wasn't hurting because of how much I used to like Doyoung.

It was hurting because of how much I still like Doyoung. And how much I regret hurting him, and ruining our relationship.

My heart started to hurt because of how much I miss Doyoung right now.