My Best Friend's Baby

I

           

I laid quietly holding a little stick, shock sinking in.  I was angry, at myself mostly, at him more so, but also at the world.  I am only nineteen, and not in college, or in a place to be able to handle this news.  Stuck in a dead-end job.  How was I supposed to tell him this? Ruin both of our lives?

As I lie there thinking about calling my phone started ringing, I answered without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?"
"Hey, Amy... Do you got a moment to talk?" his voice filled with questioned.
"Oh...hey Caleb, sure what is up?"

The line went quiet for a few moments before Caleb cleared his throat, "So... I asked Karynn to be my girlfriend..." he continued to talk, but I tuned him out. Now how was I supposed to tell him?  I cut him off before he could give me too many more details that I really couldn't handle.

"Awesome, that is cool.  I got to go," I stated too quick and ended the call. 

I stayed in bed the rest of the week and then on Monday called Planned Parenthood during my lunch break which I skillfully dodged Caleb.  I made an appointment for the next Friday, and when I told my boss he told me that was fine because I also head the next week off.

Before I knew it, Friday morning was here and I couldn't feel any worse.  I drug myself out of bed and to work with very little energy.  When I walked in my boss told me that I had a meeting with him and his boss before I could leave for my appointment.

A few hours later, I was in the meeting, and it was the second time in less than a week that I received horrible news.

"Amy, I am sorry to inform you, but we are terminating your position.   As of December 31st, you will not be working here any longer." 

I sat quietly as they continued to talk, "We just need a signature on this form that just states that we have explained everything, feel free to read it and let me know if you have any questions.  We are ready to answer anything that you may need to know."

I looked over the paper and then quickly signed where I needed to sign.  They both asked if I had any questions.

"Can I go ahead and leave for the rest of the day to get to my appointment?"

They looked concerned, but nodded and said yes.  I stood up and started to walk out, stopped and turned back around, "Also can we keep this quiet?  There are specific people I would like to tell on my own."

They agreed, and I made my way out as quick as I could.  I was walking quick enough that I ran into Caleb who was looking for our boss.

"Opps, sorry." I said with a shaking voice. 

"Nah, it's fine...but what...are you okay?" Concern thick in his voice when he saw that I was trying so hard not to lose my cool. 

I nodded quickly and pushed past him to get my things and leave.  I was now grateful for the week off.

Once in my truck I started it up, and pulled out of the parking lot quicker than I normally would, and made my way to find out the options I had.

Half an hour later I pulled into the parking lot of Planned Parenthood when my phone started to ring with the Caleb's ring tone.

"Can I help you?" I answered coldly.
"Amy...what is going on with you?  Why do you keep blowing me off?"
"Caleb, I am busy right now...I need to go. Sorry," I hung up the phone and walked into the building.

After what felt like an entire week of waiting in a waiting room that looked like what I would imagine a prison to look like, and filing out way too much paperwork; I was taken back into a very dim lighten hallway that led to a small bathroom where I peed in a cup and then waited a bit longer before I was led back to a room with a hard-plastic chair and a more comfortable chair.  I sat in the hard plastic one, I was already uncomfortable, why not continue?

I waited until an older lady walked in looking sad, "Was this your first pregnancy test?"
I shook my head no, "I took one last weekend."

The lady nodded, "Well only way to be one hundred percent sure that you are pregnant is a blood test, but the test we did today is just the same as the ones that you can buy at the store that also has the week estimator, and as quick as the positive popped up it says about three to four weeks..."

The conversation continued and she asked if I knew who the dad was, and of course I did, but I also explained I wasn't sure if he would be in the picture. When I finally left I was given the number of a doctor that helped with younger patients that would take my insurance, but still didn't charge a whole lot.

Once in my truck I called and made an appointment for an hour later.  Luckily, they had a last moment cancellation and I could get in so by Monday I would have a solid answer.  Then, I looked at my text, and had a few unread ones from Caleb.

'Why can't he take a hint' I wondered. 

---Why did you leave work early: Caleb
---Boss man said you had a doctor's appointment: Caleb
---Don't die lol, but really what is going on: Caleb
---Answer me please?  Call...we are still friends...at least I hope: Caleb

I rolled my eyes and drove back towards home, back towards my new doctor's office.  Sitting in traffic I started wondering if I could do what was needed to be a mother.  How would I tell Caleb? Just blurt it out, or ease into the news? How would my family react?

After my doctor's appointment, nothing else happened.  I went home, changed into sweats, and debated calling Caleb, but knew that I wouldn't tell him anything until I knew one hundred percent. 

Monday morning, I was woken up at about 9am with a call from the doctor, the results of my blood test said that I was four weeks pregnant.  The doctor said that he had some paperwork if I could come into the office he would be able to talk to me within the next hour.  I told him I would be in and hung up so I could get dressed. 

An hour later I was sitting on a comfortable chair with the doctor looking through some paperwork.

"So, I have a few papers for you.  I have a whole bundle of papers for help for you to keep the baby.  I also have information on adoption, and I have some on abortion if you want to go that route."

He started handing me a bunch of papers and continued, "Obviously I cannot tell you that you have to keep the baby, or that you have to tell the father, but I do know that you are going to need help.  You need someone to lean on."

"I have my best friends.  I should be good.  Thank you for the information.  I will look over everything and see what I want to do.  I will let you know as soon as possible." 

He nodded and I left without any more of an idea of how I was going to tell Caleb that I was pregnant and it was his baby.  All I knew at that point is that I wanted to go home and cry, and that is exactly what I did.