Lance's Funeral

Vol 4 / part 2: You And Me

Why are the things that I want to say
Just aren't coming out right?
I'm tripping on words
You got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

~Lifehouse / You And Me

***

Keith scanned his song selections.

The next day, as well as the ones following, Keith analyzed his songs and their meanings; the story they told with both their sound and lyrics, and picked the ones that stood out the most. Keith wasn't one for words, but he knew a thing or two about music. He wished he could find that one, perfect song to portray his feelings. The way his heart buzzed like an electric shock the moment he touched - or, hell - looked at Lance. But, no matter how long and far he searched, none was quite so powerful. Perhaps the emotion was simply too complex for the English language to comprehend. Music on the other hand; music was universal.

Hiding his phone from Lance's view, Keith checked and double checked his playlist which was labeled, Lance's Funeral. He wasn't sure why, but he couldn't bring himself to title it Lance's playlist, or just Lance, or anything that made a resemblance of sense. He thought back to the day he first found Lance - the dead Lance. They were at his funeral - his absurd funeral - and Keith remembered not knowing how to feel. That's the same way he felt listening to the playlist on repeat. Was is sad? Sweet? Angry? Honestly, it was like that but so much more.

On the way to the Christmas dinner at the McClain's house Keith could feel his hands jittering in his pockets. His thumb ran up and down the side of his phone, adjusting and readjusting the volume of his music. Not only was he supposed to meet Lance's entire family, but he was also being let into their home. Lance's place was sacred. Restricted. It felt wrong. After all the years of being Lance's friend/rival Keith never imagined his first visit to his place panning out in such a way. Walking to his home with a ghost boy on his tail. But not just any ghost boy, no, the one this family was mourning over. Everything inside Keith was screaming: "Turn around now!"

But he continued. He continued down the sidewalk, past homes and stores, and all the way to 452 Sanders Way; aka: the forbidden realm. When he knocked on the door, Mrs. McClain answered with a bright smile. "Ah! Welcome!" She greeted in her thick, Cuban accent. "And you must be... um... Lance's friend?"

"Keith." He stuttered back, looked down at her thick curls and round features, heart stumbling in his chest. "Keith Kogane."

"Ah, yes, of course." She opened the door further, giving enough room for Keith to pass. "Nice to meet you."

Keith entered and Lance followed. The entire time Lance's eyes stayed focused on his mother's, expression unreadable.

Keith immediately noticed something. This house... it was a chaotic hell hole. Kids, teens, adults, and even elders ran from one point of the room to the other, their faces saying they knew where they were going, but their movements suggesting otherwise. Keith couldn't hear a word spoken though most everyone was shouting. All the conversations merged, and therefore drained of understanding.

Keith hated it. He fumbled for his earbuds, put them in, and focused his attention on his laces. If he honed into one, unmoving spot his head would stop spinning... hopefully. He used this tactic many times in crowded areas such as school and the mall. But this? This was nothing like Keith had ever seen. The sheer discord of it all was driving Keith to the brink of shouting. He wanted to get away and quick. All of this was a mistake. He should have never come.